Memoirs of a WAG Bag

North America » United States » California » Whitney Portal
September 25th 2007

Published: September 28th 2007

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lindyblues

Say Cheese

Me and Thuan

Hi. My name is Wagner. I'm a Waste Alleviation and Gelling bag. For those of you who are unfamiliar with this, I was created along with thousands of others to keep some highly trafficked national forest lands clean by requiring backpackers to carry out all of their waste... and I do mean all of it. Anyhow, this is my story. Like my fellow wag bag brothers and sisters, I came off of an assembly line. We all then get shipped out to various locales. I must've done something pretty good in my previous life because I ended up at Mount Whitney and in the hands of that fine strapping fellow in the first picture.

Thuan arrived at the Mount Whitney Portal via Tioga pass in Yosemite where he and his friends ate at the Mobil Restaurant ... basically a 2-star dining area run by a 5-star chef. Mmmm mmmm for me too, if you know what I mean. Definitely, all wag baggers should try the fish tacos. My journey started at the Whitney portal with Thuan and his friends, Heather, Adam, and Heather's brother Aaron. Thuan's dear friend, Margy, could not make the trip due to some

On the way up

lame excuse about having strep, so Thuan decided to dedicate his wag bag usage to her.

Anyhow, the trail began innocently enough with the first 2000 vertical feet covering over 4 miles to the Outpost Camp. I was kept warm in Thuan's pocket. I was able to peak out now and then and caught some spectacular views. All through the hike, I was able to bond with Thuan because his hiking companions were in much better shape and raced ahead. In fact, one of them was even able to hike with her eyes closed. The next 2000 vertical feet took us to our camp for the evening at 12000 feet. The temperature quickly dropped as the sun sank behind the mountains. We quickly made dinner, pumped water, and sought warmth in our tents. I was so glad to be in Thuan's tent even though Aaron kept the other tent very warm with his flatulence. It even made a wag bag like me blush. I think I actually shed a tear for his wag bag.

The night was beautiful. I was able to peak out the tent when Thuan got up. I thought that it was time

Ahhh... full

for me to do my job, but he just went for a pee. The moon was shining over his silhouette as a steady stream arced over the side of the cliff. Boy, it really sounded like Thuan stayed well hydrated. I had a hard time getting some rest as Thuan kept tossing all night long in the 15 degree temperature. Finally, day break came. Heather made us some real oatmeal. (Translation... it took freakin' forever to make it... let's get the instant stuff next time... i won't notice the difference).

We began breaking camp. At this point, Thuan took me for a little walk off the trail. I really enjoy our alone time together. We ducked behind a big boulder where he placed me on the ground. It felt so warm there with the sun beating down on me. Wait... what the @!#$... where'd the sun go? Is it an eclipse or something? Argh... Oh yum... fish tacos. At this point all I could hear was the scream of, "Margy!!!!! This one's for you!!"

Anyhow, after our moment together, we got back to the business at hand of summiting Mt. Whitney. Today was the day of fabulous views.

Back home

We passed by a small frozen lake, our last water source and hit the section of the trail known as the 97 switch backs. Just awful, but the higher you got, the more spectacular the views became. Even though we were close to 13000 feet at this point, it was rather warm.

We finally made it to the trail crest and this is where our trip came to a close as the snow storm of the previous days have made the summit trail impassable. Still, the views from 13,600 feet are still ok. The trip back down was mostly uneventful. I flopped around in the back of Thuan's pack until we arrived at the original trailhead. There, Thuan dropped me off with my friends who I know back in our factory days. Boy, was it good to be home. Thanks Thuan for carrying me on a wonderful trip.

Additional photos below

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