Spain 43 - San Lorenzo El Escorial/The pudidero /a monastery, a basilica, a chapel and a palace

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Today we had to traverse Madrid again using its network of ring roads. M25/M1 and M6 all rolled into one. To make it worse it was rush hour and the morning traffic was awful. Nose to nose all along the route. The Spanish are impatient drivers weaving in and out of the traffic at impossible angles and doing excessive speed. The route is stop . start as other roads join us or our road leaves the motorway. It feels as if we are getting nowhere fast. We even see our first car accidents. We had commented that we had seen none this trip and then true to form once one came along another followed pretty closely. Both the same. A driver travelling too fast . Perhaps using a mobile phone or not concentrating. The car in front brakes and before they know it the back car shunts into the rear of the one in front. One car suffers damage to its boot. Its boot is now on its back seat. The other has no engine to speak of. It is now in the front drivers seat. It didn't look as if anyone was hurt but hard to say as there were ambulances on site, recovery vehicles and fire engines. Everyday it must happen in downtown Madrid.

We eventally left the city outskirts and found our way into the mountains and to the Valle de los Caidos or the Valley of the Fallen. This is a catholic basilica and monumental memorial in the municipality of San Lorenzo de El Escorial .It lies within the Sierra de Guadarrama. and was raised by Spanish general Francisco Franco to honour and bury those who fell fighting for his "Glorious Crusade", during the Spanish Civil War. Franco claimed that the monument was meant to be a "national act of atonement" and reconciliation. The Valley of the Fallen, as a surviving monument of Franco's rule, and its Catholic basilica remain controversial, in part since 10% of the construction workforce consisted of convicts, some of whom were Spanish Republican political prisoners. It was one of those places you feel you should visit but on the other hand you are not quite sure about.

We could see the cross from miles away. It absolutely dominates the skyline and the mountainside. The basilica beneath is less easy to see as it lies low in the landscape and blends in more. The nearer you get the easier it is to be seen.

Franco is buried there and that is another reason the place has developed a reputation of being built by a dictator and glorifying what was just like a Nazi concentration camp. We made the decision not to visit.

Our next stop was the town of El Escorial. A bit difficult to find parking places. We expected huge spaces due to the interest in the place. We did spot a sign but failed to find the car park. A second attempt found another sign but no a clue where the parking was. We were later to find out they were all underground which would have caused us endless problems getting Suzy in. She is too high, too wide, too everything to get in. By a stroke of good luck we did fall upon a street out of the way with off street parking. With no sign of a meter we parked up, took a photo of the calle name and headed off down to the playa mayor.

The monastery is huge. Seriously huge. Big, bulky, grey and quite ugly. A brutal building with no ornamentation. Some buildings you can take to. This one is just downright ugly . It has been in the past a monastery, a basilica, a royal palace and the Pantheon Real. As we approached we noticed the queues it did not open until 10 and exactly on 10 a big bell in the square bonged into life and doors slowly opened . We did not get far as we were subject to airport style security. I got out my 10 euros entrance fee for me and my 5 for senior Glenn but then realised I had not brought the passports. Sometimes we get a jobsworth who will not let us in without the passport. Other times we are lucky and they let us in without them. Today I got a no you are not coming in for reducted rate even if I can see you are over 65. When we got in we walked what seemed like miles of empty grey corridors that went nowhere. Sadly we had no guide book. Nor did we have a plan and because I wea hearing aids I cannot use the headsets they provide. It was as dark inside as it was outside and to make matters worse - yes you guessed it no photographs.

After a little while we emerged into the light and tried to go in a chapel . There are security guards everywhere. He raised his hands, raised his voice and said "NO " pointing emphatically across the courtyard and shouted loudly at us "THE BIBLIOTHEQUE". Ok we thought - the library it is. We took a few outdoor photos whilst we had the chance. The library was one long gallery with a painted ceiling , wooden globes down the middle and books in cases along the walls. Now the books were something else . In each corner a tiny painting of medieval farm life. The farmer tending his sheep, the woodsman cutting logs and the farm workers bringing in the harvest . We got to the end and crossed the courtyard again trying vainly for the chapels . Our route was barred again. "NO" he screamed - "THE BIBLIOTHEQUE". This time Mrs Nasty emerged - I have been to the ******* bibliotheque I dont ******** want to go again . It must have worked as he let us in to the tiny chapel with its altar, its 16th century light oak pews and paintings . Nothing special we thought. And then we got to it the sign to the pantheon. Our visit truly begins

Are you coming in with me? It is dark down there . Mind the steps . As our eyes adjust to the light we have entered a small space with courts of arms on the upper walls. They are the only colour in what is otherwise a pure white room. So white can you see it glistening? Marble everwhere. On both side are tombs . They are all the same. Uniform in shape, in size and the writing on them. If you look closely it is in Spanish sometimes and Latin others. In each of these tombs are buried a member of the royal family. The carvings are exquisite Even though each tomb looks like its neighbour they hold a fascination about an extended royal family. Let's leave this room and go to the next . Exactly the same - pure white - four coffins in marble sarcophagus on one side and the same facing. The same courts of arms above them; The same engraving. We have the place to ourselves . It is deathly silent down here. Now walk with me to the next room. This is the burial place of all the infant children of royalty. When you look at it what do you see? A blooming great wedding cake iced to perfection. The royal icing is pure white and shining just as good icing should be. The piping bag has been taken out and the decorated has gone made with flowers, and patterns, dots and all manner of pretty patterns. It is shaped like an old fashioned threepenny bit with about eight sides. Each side the same as its neighbour. In each part is the body of a tiny child .

Our next crypt holds an ornate altar and the sarcophagus of Don Juan dressed as knight in medieval armour. He lies on his own in a darkened niche. Lets leave the ladies and the babies and go into the piece de resistance the royal burial chamber . It is dark and gloomy with coffins lining the circular walls Look around you - all the coffins are dark marble gilded in gold. All identical . All the same size . A sort of one size fits all approach. EAch niche is the same size designed to hold one size coffin. Kings on one side three deep. Queens who have borne kings the other side three deep. Now where are they going to put any more I wonder as I look around.

Now do you want to hear the gory bit . Lets think about dying. Not a nice thought but it happens to all of us. Well if you are a king here in Spain then you have a special journey to go on after death. Not just any old hole in the ground for you. You have a place in this house of death but there is a journey to go through before you get there. The title in the blog gives a clue . El puditatry - it sounds like putrid in any language . So what happens to you . Well I guess first of all you have a ceremony , a service of thanksgiving and then the monks at the monastery take you away. Not to bury you but to take you to the Rotting house. Sorry we cannot go to the rotting house. No-one but a few monks are allowed in there. It is secret but it is behind the coffins in the niches apparently. The kings body is put into lime to help it break down and left in the rotting house for 20 years or more until the decaying process is over and all that is left are the kings bones. it is at this point that the scraping and cleaning starts. Once cleaned the bones are packed away in their ornate gold and brown coffin and placed in the appropriate niche. Apparently there are bodies of King Juan Carlos family in the rotting room decaying away but not quite ready for their final resting place .

All right enough of gruesome lets go and have a look at the rest of the palace of the Borbons. We see room after room that the King of Spain Philip II used . The room he said he wanted to rule the world on a piece of 2" paper. Look at the wall paper on the walls. The small room he died in. The bed he died in whilst looking at his own personal altar. His wifes room where she died looking at the same altar. His sedan chair . Walk with me through the long gallery the gallery of the battles . Along one wall a painting of all the successful battles Spain fought . Interesting but by the time we have walked half way it is becoming a bit the same . Now its how to find our way out . As coming in we walk endless corridors all grey all looking the same.

We come out near the bibliotheque . No way out there. Eventually we give up and ask and are shown how to escape the building. What a place . Not so much interesting as a building but worth the money to see the pantheon which must be the most beautiful I have ever been in. I hope you agree. But what about the Rotting room? Never been in one and guess never will but wouldnt that be a novel experience .

As we left we stopped off at a cafe for a well deserved coca cola and cold orange which we drank in the sun which was streaming now into the square . Strangely though it did nothing to liven up the otherwise dull grey of the fortress like El Escorial .

Tonight we are heading for the Basque country which means homeward bound .

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