Krakow

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On the train to Krakow, we were fortunate enough to make the aquaintance of one Johnny Small, a fellow traveller from Edinburgh. We had dinner with him at the station, and exchanged hilarious stories. And Jenna's mouth sort of exploded, which she called a mouth fart- Johnny was thrilled. We arranged to meet him in a pub later, and toddled off to our hostel.

Deco Hostel is the best by far. For very little monies we got hotel styley beds, sparkly bathrooms (mr muscle would be proud), a free washing service, a common room with bean bags and tv and xbox, breakfast and lunch, and 50's style deco. We were living like queens! We got a group together, and went to Singer, a bar that had singer sewing machines attached to every table. We found Johnny, who brought a friend who had a joint with him from Amsterdam. Luckily Kat and I had barely a sniff at it, because it was the strongest stuff. Johnny consequently lost it, we've never seen anyone so stoned! In between giggles, he demonstrated how the Scots roll a joint with a pint glass- "Half! Not even half, WITH tabacco. SPRINKLE! Roooooollllll , lick.". He also told us the funniest story we have ever heard.

So there's a friend of his, and she goes back to this guys flat. In the morning he gets up for work and tells her to let herself out. She writes a cute little note, saying how she had a great time and leaves it on the table. She then decides to go for a poo. Low and behold the toilet doens't flush, so she fishes out her poo with a plastic bag. SOMEHOW, she forgets about it in the process of leaving, and as she is shutting the door realises the poo in the plastic bag is on the kitchen table, neatly placed next to the note. He didn't call.

No one could top this. It almost got awkward, how do you follow that! So we all went home...

The next day we joined a free walking tour- hours we will never get back! The guide (who had the smallest body and the biggest head, how?) exaggerated everything, we felt as though everything should be taken with a pinch of salt. After an hour and a half we'd had enough, so ducked into an 'Alkohole' (off license) giggling like school girls, waited for the group to pass and then ran in the opposite direction. I think the adrenaline must have gone to Kat's head because she then suggested we get piercings (she's fraying at the edges!). So we went into a place called Rock'n'Ink. After Kat's initial shock over the blood on the curtain (actually paint, obviously there for a joke), and then after much persuasion ("nooo, noo, maybe, ummm do you numb it? Jen I'm scared") she manned up and got her nose pierced, and we were all very proud. Whilst comforting and persuading Kat, Jenna completely forgot she was getting one too, and then freaked a little. But also manned up- cartilage pierced. So we left and went for ice cream.

Later, we went to an awesome little pub in the Jewish Quarter called Alchemia. We met William Spencer and Victor through the couple we were with, and went on to Kitsch. Weirdest club. It was a late 80s, early 90s Europop surprise, the surprise being the persistent gropage on the dance floor. Unimpressed, we left after an hour or so of dancing within the safety of the group we were with. Kat got William Spencer's details- he explained them: "here's my name, add me on facebook, and that's a bee". Worst drawing of a bee ever!

In the morning, after the hangover had passed, we went to the salt mines. We were told by the tour guide, after we had parted with 54 zloty, not to expect much! She then asked us to refrain from licking the statues made of salt, but that we could eat a kilogram of salt if we wanted from the walls, floor or ceiling. This was another moment where we looked at each other saying "Where are we?!". 3 hours later, after some very beautiful carvings, an overdramatic light display, an hour of queueing and a ride on a ten person 'lift' (more like metal box of hell), we made it to the surface! Back in Krakow, we went to the Jewish Quarter and ate a Zapiekanka; google it, you'll want one. It was bigger than an arm! But we found room for ice cream...

After a food coma, we went out to a biker pub called Carpe Diem. We were outdone by Jessica, an American we met, who refused lager saying she only drank rum, and then pulled out a cigar- so hardcore! We then moved on to Frantic- another shit club! But we met some lovely French boys and had a good bop.

The next day, we did what we were dreading but knew was a must- we went to visit Auschwitz. It was as you would expect, incredibly moving, very upsetting but extremely informative. We found it very hard to return to normal, but recovered by the next day, and were glad we went.

Blog on Slovakian mountains and Bratislava to follow. Over and out

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