Eue De Cologne

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The Ruhr Area is huge. Cities merge together, to the extent it is impossible to determine which one you're in at the moment. This massive zone attracts lots of people. People in cars. Even though the German Autobahn is an impressive network of roads, traffic jams are inevitable. This is one of those places, where lots of people decided to take their cars out for a ride, all at the same time, resulting in a complete standstill. An indicator on the dashboard is going into red. Smoke is coming out of the engine. A broken radiator and a traffic jam - bad combination. Pulling on to the shoulder and let the car cool down is only a temporary solution. We have to take the first exit to the first town.

The town where nobody speaks English. The middle-aged car mechanics in the little garage on a side street politely but firmly deny any knowledge of any other language than German. "Eh...meine auto ist kaputt." Simple, but clear. "My car is broken", along with a sad face and some pointing, and I manager to convey the message. The guys at the garage decide take a look at it. Just when it seems like they have fixed the problem, I hear the words "Scheisse...Nicht gut". Means "Shit...Not good". I don't understand the technicalities of the problem, especially in a language where my knowledge is limited to ordering food or drinks. But it seems bad. They suggest that I dump the car in the forest and take the license plates off. We decide to test out luck and go against their professional advice, and pursue our trip to southern Spain...Not until later did we realize that the town where nobody spoke English was Köln/Cologne. For me the city where the hunt for water to the radiator throughout Europe began.

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