Francy pants

---

Woke up in my cozy coffin as the train pulled into Paris this morning. I really enjoyed the sleeper train, though I think other members of my party were expecting a little more room and comfort and bathrooms.

From the train station we took a taxi to our apartment that my parents have rented for a week. My parents did a lot of research to pick a good spot to stay, so it was disturbing to receive an email the day before saying the location had been moved due to flood damage. The new location is several blocks farther from the Seine river, but still in the heart of the Marais district. The Marais is defined thusly: Le Marais ("The Marsh") is a historic district in Paris, France. Long the aristocratic district of Paris, it hosts many outstanding buildings of historic and architectural importance. It spreads across parts of the 3rd and 4th arrondissements in Paris (on the Rive Droite, or Right Bank, of the Seine). In 1240 the Order of the Temple built its fortified church just outside Paris's walls, in the northern part of the Marais. The Temple turned the district into an attractive area, and many religious institutions were built nearby: the des Blancs-Manteaux, de Sainte-Croix-de-la-Bretonnerie and des Carmes-Billettes convents, as well as the church of Sainte-Catherine-du-Val-des-Écoliers.

During the mid-13th century, Charles I of Anjou, King of Naples and Sicily, and brother of King Louis IX of France built his residence near the current n°7 rue de Sévigné. In 1361 the King Charles V built a mansion known as the Hôtel Saint-Pol in which the Royal Court settled during his reign as well as his son's.

From that time to the 17th century and especially after the Royal Square (Place Royale, current place des Vosges) was designed under King Henri IV in 1605, the Marais was the French nobility's favorite place of residence. French nobles built their urban mansions there such as the Hôtel de Sens, the Hôtel de Sully, the Hôtel de Beauvais, the Hôtel Carnavalet, the Hôtel de Guénégaud, and the Hôtel de Soubise.

After the nobility started to move to the Faubourg Saint-Germain, the district became a popular and active commercial area, hosting one of Paris' main Jewish communities. But, during World War II the Jewish community was targeted by the Nazis who were occupying France. The rue des Rosiers is still a major centre of the Paris Jewish community, which has made a renewal since the 1990s. Public notices announce Jewish events, bookshops specialize in Jewish books, and numerous restaurants and other outlets sell kosher food.

By the 1950s, the district had become a working-class area and most of its architectural masterpieces were in bad state of repair. In 1964, General de Gaulle's Culture Minister Andre Malraux made the Marais the first secteur sauvegardé (literally secured area). These were meant to protect and conserve places of special cultural significance. The following decades, the government and the Parisian municipality have led an active restoration and Rehabilitation Policy.

The main Hôtels particuliers have been restored and turned into museums: the Hôtel Salé hosts the Picasso Museum, the Hôtel Carnavalet hosts the Paris Historical Museum, the Hôtel Donon hosts the Cognac-Jay Museum etc. The Marais is now one of Paris' main localities for art galleries. Following its rehabilitation, the Marais has become a fashionable district, home to many trendy restaurants, fashion houses, and hype galleries. The neighbourhood has experienced a growing gay presence since the 1980s, as evidenced by the existence of many gay cafés, nightclubs, cabarets and shops. Other features of the neighbourhood include the Musée Picasso, the house of Nicolas Flamel, the Musée Cognacq-Jay, the Musée Carnavalet and the new and very popular Café Charlot.

While we waited to meet the contact for the appartment to show us the ropes and hand over the keys, we had a big hearty breakfast at the cafe at the end of our street. Much like in Montreal, I attempt to speak French to the servers in restaurants and more ikely than not they answer in English. The fellow who served our breakfast was nice about it though. My mother and I both had croque Madame, which is a grilled ham and cheese sandwich with a fried egg on top and is absolutely delicious.

We met Sonia, who has pretty good English, and she took us up the floor flights of crooked stars to our funny, crooked little apartment, with a best of Dolly Parton vinyl record displayed on the bookcase. We have a bathroom, a little kitchen, a bedroom and a pull out couch for me that is identical to the one my parents bought from Ikea for us to use in Vancouver when Braedon and I visit for Christmas.

We went for a big walk to the visitors center over by the louvre to pick up our Paris passes, which give us admission to everything in the city. The walk along the seine river was very pretty. Paris is full of scents, jasmine, fresh bread, hot pavement, and frequent extremely pungent wafts of urine.

We walked past Norte dame, which is crawling with tourists, and we took a photo of me standing in front of it with "happy 29th birthday Cam!!!" written on it, since it is my brother in law's birthday today, and I'm missing it for about the fifth year in a row. We'll go into Norte dame another time, first thing in the morning when it isn't so busy. We crossed many beautiful old bridges, and I could see the tiny distant Eiffel tower. The louvre is absolutely enormous and for some reason patrolled by soldiers in desert camouflage and machine guns.

Some things I have learned so far about the French:

- they are a performing people. We saw several street performances today, including a group of three young men doing an acrobatic routine in the weirdest square in Paris, a group of acapella singers performing 50's pop hits, and evening street singers with plumes of red hair and charisma to match

- they like their mustard ("moutard" in French, which has always been the nail in the coffin for my brother believing french is a reasonable language). With both meals yesterday we were provided with a little pot of mustard

- they are very fashionable. I think. I've seen some really weird fashion in Paris, including the return of a sort of hipster harem pants. These pants are high wasted and tight, except for a very long crotch almost to their knees, and then from the knees down they are very tight.

- their urine is extra potent. I have never smelled urine like the french urine.

I have synthesized these points into a hypothesis. All that mustard gives French people incredibly potent urine, which constantly leaks out of them, interrupting their performances. To cope with this, they must wear diapers, but these were painfully obvious in skinny jeans. The designers in Paris cried, "I know! I will lower ze crotch of ze pants, and zen the diaper will be concealed and za moutard urine will be collected rather zan steenk up za street!"



For dinner we went to a very pedestrian looking crepe and wifi (?) place. My parents had the duck special, which they really enjoyed, and I had my first savory crepe, the "rustique" which had chicken, potatoes and onions and was delicious.

Tomorrow we're...I'm not sure what we're up to. We have lots of sights to see but I'm unsure of the order. I know I get to have a pastry though!

---