Traveling alone in Southeast Asia

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A lot of people ask what it's like to travel alone here, and I can say that I have enjoyed it for the most part. I do, however, think that Southeast Asia can be a little tougher for a solo traveler than some other parts of the world I've traveled in, such as Latin America and Europe, just because of the way that accommodations are set up. In Latin America and Europe (and Australia/New Zealand, from what I understand) there are backpacker hostels everywhere that often have dorm rooms and common hangout spaces and/or bars and restaurants right there. That is sometimes the case here, especially in particular backpacker havens like Vang Vieng, but usually you are in a guesthouse or a little hotel that doesn't really have common spaces and so you don't automatically meet people where you are staying. You sometimes have to put a bit more effort into it-- seeking out company at a restaurant or a bar in a way that you probably wouldn't ever find yourself doing at home.

I don't mind eating some meals on my own and I often actually prefer to do sightseeing by myself because then I can go at my own sweet pace (but that also explains why I don't have too many pictures of myself), but if I feel like going out at night and have just gotten to a place, then I need to make the effort to meet people more than I would if the hostel was full of backpackers. There's a bit of a game with it. Sometimes I sort of pass by a bunch of restaurants looking for people that seem "joinable" and or other solo travelers. I usually bring a book, though, too, just in case, because ify you don't find someone to join for a meal it can be a little boring to sit there staring at the table before the food comes. But you also don't want to seem 'unavailable' for conversation should the chance present itself. The other night in Hue I sat down at a restaurant because I was really hungry, but right away I surveyed the situation at the other tables. I spotted a girl 2 tables over who appeared to be by herself. I double-checked that there was just one drink on the table (no boyfriend or travel buddy in the bathroom, e.g.). I sent a few exploratory looks in her direction and she reciprocated and so we quickly joined forces and began the usual introductory dialogue: "Where are you from? How long have you been traveling? What countries are you going to? Where do you go next?" Often, I've found, we even forget to introduce ourselves properly in the first 10 minutes or so and I have developed the admittedly bad habit of forgetting peoples' names almost immediately and only putting them in my memory if we hang out more than once. After a few minutes, a solo guy appeared and we invited him over to the table. So we had quickly developed a triumvirate for the evening, which ended up entailing dinner and some drinks and a few games of Jenga later on.

I've met some great couples along the way who've invited me over to join their tables. I spent a couple days in Hoi An with one such couple, Wendy and Rob from San Diego, after they invited me to join their table at breakfast one day, and coincidentally we are on the same flight back to Thailand from Saigon, so I will see them again in a few days! I find that groups of 3 or more are usually pretty insulated and hard to get into, though the group I met on the boat on Halong Bay and then hung out with again in Hoi An was a group of 3. The easiest thing to do is to meet other solo travelers, of which there tend to be more male than female, but there are still a good number of females out there. Anyone who has traveled on their own before is usually a good bet and tend to be most welcoming. Another method that has worked well for me a couple of times is to find someone you met somewhere along the way at one point or another. This method worked for me one night in Luang Prabang, when I bumped into 2 American girls had met in Vang Vieng and another time in Hoi An when I bumped into an English guy I'd also met, though very briefly, in Laos. Company for the evening taken care of!

Addendum:
After I published this blog, I made my way back over to the beaches in the south of Thailand where almost everyone is really open and laid-back and friendly. I flew from Saigon to Bangkok to Krabi and made my way right to Tonsai Beach and it was like arriving at friendly paradise. It was so easy to meet people and I spent several days there with lovely people. After that I made my way to Ko Phi Phi and stayed in the hostel there called The Rock. Again, hostels as such aren't really as common in SE Asia, but when you come across them, they are just the same as hostels everywhere-- filled to the brim with backpackers and very social. At The Rock it was always either to get a group together to go eat or go out for the evening. It was a good time!

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