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Published: March 24th 2011
24 hours of comfort
Our transport from Vientiane to Hanoi(N) The abuse began before we even left Laos. We were shoved in a very un-Lao manner onto a bus that did not remotely resemble the expensive VIP sleeping bus we had booked to Hanoi. After deciding against paying $270 for flights, we had paid extra for a bit of comfort during the 27-hour bus journey and were sufficiently shocked to find we we faced the trip in a local bus with no toilets on board. We got rather angry – we have no problem travelling on local transport, but then we want to pay local transport prices. But we found ourselves in a classic scam, where those responsible conveniently stopped speaking English and we were at their mercy for getting us to our destination. We were ignored, pushed and shouted at by the bus drivers; some poor souls were actually manhandled into leaving their assigned seats for Vietnamese late arrivals and had to sit in the back on non-reclining chairs. The driving was no less aggressive. My mind was transported right back to Malawi, and I was digging my fingernails into Matt’s hand the first time we overtook two lorries at a time on a village road at 110 km/h.
All the time, horns were honked furiously and continuously and we got no sleep until we pulled in at the border post at 1.30am.
The next morning we were woken up at 6.30 with more shouting /pulling of sleeves and ordered in Vietnamese: “Get your sorry asses to immigration – NOW!!!” I’m sure that’s what they said anyway. Then there were the charming border officials who imposed a 1 dollar charge for stamping (western) foreign passports, despite us being in procession of a valid one month visa which had already cost us a whopping 50 bucks. My attempts at avoiding the bribe “Oh... a processing fee! I understand.... can we have a receipt?” were met by furious shaking of heads, followed by a clear message: “No dollar, no stamp, no Vietnam!!” So, what can you do? Pay up and bear it. After a gruelling 24 hours on the bus, the drivers then wanted to drop us in a dusty parking lot 10 kilometres outside Hanoi and offloaded all the luggage belonging to foreigners. “The bus stops here”, we were told, while the Vietnamese passengers remained seated. Thanks to a collective uprising, we eventually argued our way back on the
bus and onto our final destination.
During our first 24 hours, I hated Vietnam. Never had I met ruder or more shameless people, and this was especially harsh coming from lovely, sleepy Laos. Our minds were already set to a don’t-trust-anyone mode and we were feeling rather gloomy. But thankfully, Hanoi was brilliant. There were more scams to come, doctored taxi meters and the like, but the good (and the crazy!) most definitely outweighed the ugly. We stayed in Hanoi’s hugely atmospheric Old Quarter, made up of narrow traditional merchants’ houses, food and flower stalls, and a sprinkling of old French colonial buildings. Every road is decorated with lanterns, Vietnamese flags and red propaganda banners, apparently desperate to hold on to the city’s former socialist glory. And then there are millions of motorbikes. I mean, millions. It’s all you see at first, an army of motorbikes coming from all directions, going to all directions at the same time, in disregard of all traffic rules but strangely fluid, like a highway of marching ants. Crossing the road for the first time was terrifying - traffic lights and zebra crossings are ignored by motorbikes; we waited for a gap in the
traffic but there wasn't one. So we did what the locals do: stride confidently into the traffic and walk across with purposeful steps and a determined attitude – and the motorbikes avoid you! After a while, we considered it a sport and enjoyed it hugely.
Having established how to get from A to B, we embarked upon a tour of the city and its sights. We paid a visit to the hugely interesting War Remnants Museum, where old US tanks and shot down planes neighbour left-wing propaganda posters and proclamations of international support for Ho Chi Minh’s army from seemingly every corner of the world. In one part, a shocking exhibition teaches about the effects of chemical agents like Agent Orange, used by the US during the war on the Vietnamese population; and we were going to see them first hand during the rest of our trip through Vietnam. We also visited the Military Museum and took in a Water Puppetry show, which was, though touristy, nice. The absolute highlight however, was the mausoleum of Ho Chi Minh, set in an imposing complex with large squares and sinister grey Soviet-style structures – it was fabulous. It takes quite some
time to get to the actual mausoleum, as hundreds (thousands??) of Vietnamese line up every day to pay respect to their late hero. So we joined the sombre queue and after having deposited our camera and been told to “behave appropriately” (no photos or smiles allowed), we walked the red carpet towards Uncle Ho’s final resting place, a square, dark room where his embalmed body lies displayed in a glass coffin. I got goosebumps all over when I stepped into the room – it was cold, silent and heavy with the weight of history. It’s quite something to see such an icon in the (if cold) flesh... you could cut the atmosphere with a knife. Sadly with so many visitors there was no time to linger. Guards with serious expressions swiftly ordered us to march on, ensuring that everyone gets their 15 seconds of Ho. “Looking good, the ol’ chap,” remarked Matt upon leaving. “Peaceful,” I replied, thinking how great it is that the Vietnamese worhip their hero in such a grand and respectful way. Then we learned that Ho Chi Minh’s last will was to be cremated... err... well... Anything for the Party!
We washed the experience down
with a few “bia hoi” – home brewed beer from the keg served on little fold up tables for 25 cents a glass – and, spirits high, looked forward to our upcoming 2-day boat trip in Halong Bay. Unfortunately that trip was only memorable for being, as Matt aptly baptised it, a total dog show. There were delays, more rudeness and undelivered promises that ruined what should have been an experience of a very beautiful place. One week later, one of the boats we had been on, sank, drowning 12 people. We were shocked, but to be honest, not surprised.
Our Halong Bay experience was only saved by a) our visit to the spectacular Sung Sot cave and b) once again a bunch of great people who we met on the boat: Aaron from New York and three awesome girls from Canada who were even more mistreated than we were. We bonded over the bad experience, got drunk on the deck and saw the funny side of it. Back in Hanoi, we spent another great evening together, sampling the local cuisine, consuming more bia hoi, and ended up in a ueber funky bar called The Factory, which was so
rock'n'roll I temporarily considered leasing it and turning it into a music venue. We came across loads of cool bars like that – the Vietnamese have an amazing and quirky sense of style and design. If you exclude fake Luis Vuitton motorbike seat covers...
To sum it up – Hanoi was interesting, shambolic, charming, fascinating and entirely lovable. For our next destination, the former Vietnamese capital of Hue, it was always going to be a tough act to follow. We thought the city was dull and unattractive, and the citadel, which houses the remnants of the former Imperial City, entirely missable – the ruins have been over-restored, and in my opinion, it’s destroyed their charm. Then again, it was cold and raining and both Matt and I were sick, so perhaps our judgement was a little too harsh. We left Hue after one day and again felt distinctly unexcited about our remaining time in Vietnam, but - once again – we were completely surprised! In fact, our next stop marked the beginning of a little love affair with the country we had been so unsure about...
It all started it Hoi An, a city about half way down
the coast and a UNESCO World Cultural Heritage Site. It’s famous for an abundance of crumbling-but-beautiful French colonial houses, many of which house tailor shops, a monthly full-moon festival where locals place lotus-flower shaped lanterns into the river, and for its food... which makes my mouth water just thinking about it. Hoi An has its own cuisine different to ordinary Vietnamese food (which of course isn’t bad either!), and it is to date the best food we have had on our travels... we were so impressed that we promptly signed up for another cooking class, which was even better than the one we did in Chiang Mai. After each course we declared “this is the best, it can’t get any better” and were proven wrong. Fresh prawn spring rolls, deep fried wontons with tomato salsa, the Hoi An signature dish Mi Quang and Fish in Banana leaf are now all in our repertoire. Money well spent!
On Valentine’s Day, we went for a meal in a stunning restaurant and treated ourselves to a bottle of rather expensive red wine. The stuff is imported and therefore carries a hugely inflated price tag, but gosh it was worth it! When we
weren’t eating, we wandered down Hoi An’s little alleys, browsed the tailor shops, drank coffee gazing out over the river, or cycled through the surrounding countryside to the beaches. One day, we rented a scooter and rode out to the Marble Mountains, a group of five limestone and marble hills near Da Nang, which harbour a number of impressive caves and beautiful Buddhist temples. It was a really nice day trip and we were loving the scooter ride. On our last night in Hoi An, we were lucky enough to witness the city’s full moon celebrations. During the monthly festival, traffic is banned in the historic area surrounding the river to give to way to an array of traditional performers, and silk lanters provide the main source of light for the city... it was beautiful. We had such a nice four days in Hoi An, that Matt had to drag me out kicking and screaming – I could have happily stayed another week and munched my way through every other restaurant in the city!
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olivia
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hoi an
loved hoi an too! pity it rained the whole time we were there, but still an amazing place. we aslo took a cooking class but was shocked at the amount of salt and sugar they put in all the food!