THAILAND

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I’ve just arrived back in the former British colony of India after 3 glorious weeks in Thailand...It's clear that these guys are still extremely bitter about our former history…as I had major visa problems in the Indian embassy getting back over here…In the end they gave me a 1 entry 3 month visa and not multiple entry (and was planning on a nipping over to Nepal …bugger bugger bo***cks… ) It felt like the embassy was preparing me for the hardship of coming back to India. I can’t even describe the culture shock I’m feeling at the moment. I arrived back to more train station nightmares (see previous blog) and when arriving at the small pilgrim town of Triplicate (where I missed my connecting train and was forced to spend the night in somewhere as clean as the street) a very strange shaven headed lunatic dressed in orange accosted me and wouldn’t leave me alone. Luckily 2 bystanders eventually came to my aid and restrained him so I could get away as my shouts of ‘f**k off’ didn’t seem to work.
I was seriously wondering why I left lovely Thailand for this shit. Then I somehow managed to see the funny side of it all and even shared my crackers with all the Indians that came up and stared at me in the train station early the next morning (I was actually taking the piss to get them to piss off, but that concept was lost on them) Awww bless em….crazy peoples…
Anyway I’m on a 3 day journey to get across from the East coast of India (Chennai) to the West coast of India (Mumbai) to pick up my bezzie mate April from the airport for an indefinite amount of travel and frolics. (She’s taken the plunge, quit her job, packed her bag and has her ticket booked to OZ with me in November…no backing out now!) I’m stopping off enroute to Mumbai via the ancient ruin city of Hampi…hippy’s paradise…can’t wait…am spending the 10 hour train ride thinking about how much fun I had in Thailand and how I’m planning my next trip back already.

I only had 3 weeks in all…got straight onto the visa thing on arrival to get it out the way. Staying in the backpacker district of Bangkok (Kho San Road and its vicinity) was like a 1 stop backpacker paradise…I wondered in to a small tourist office (which doubled as cheap music/movie download and i-pod store) and they agreed to process my visa for me. They gave me the lowdown on island hopping and sold me a ticket to the island of Koh Tao, just off the East Coast and next to the islands Ko Phangnan (full moon party island)and Koh Samui (used to be great but now over commercialized and expensive luxury retreats). Koh Tao was described as small, beautiful, lively, inexpensive, with lots of scuba diving and adventure sports…sounded right up my street…It was everything it promised and more….If I ever go to a shrink and they ask me to go to my happy place…I would imagine lying on a Thai cushion on the beach at night …sea lapping at my feet….great ambient chill out music playing, with a glass of wine. It’s a place you can walk around barefoot in a bikini at any time of day or night and no one thinks its weird….god why did I leave???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
Anyway, I was doing just that…and taking in diving, yoga, hanging out with new friends. All good…I kept looking 4 the catch and was stressed to find there was none, until I got a phonecall from the tourist office - the Indian embassy wanted to have a chat with me…NOOOOOO it was Thursday and the weekend was looming when they’d be shut for 2 days…Christ, I had to leave now! Packed my stuff in a whirlwind and managed to get the afternoon bus and boat. 11 hours later was back in Bangkok, got a bit of shut eye then in the embassy first thing Friday morning. When I got there I was asked why I wanted to go back to India after being there already for 3 months. I replied ‘because I do’ and they said 'oh okay'…and stamped it…Come and collect it in 4 days time. I explained I was going back to the islands and could I come get it in a couple of weeks…’Sure no problem’ they said. Hahaha…don’t make me laugh…..
So anyway, it wasn’t all bad, it meant I had an unexpected extra weekend in Bangkok (yay!!) can’t complain about that…hedonism and cool shopping…picked myself up an underwater camera case, hard drive and techy gadgets from the amazing and wonderful Prantip Plaza shopping mall (this place puts computer plaza in Dubai to shame) went to the world of MBK shopping mall (7 floors of cheap amazing things you never thought you needed….) xtra amount of fun on kho San Road then 11 hours back on the bus and boat. I started to really like that journey...met loads of cool people...you have enough time to know people's life stories in that journey time...met some characters...1 was a really cool ex Vietnam veteran from NZ...he told me all about his experiences fighting in Malaysia with a crazy Scottish battallion...he'd managed to avoid a lot of the serious fighting, but had learnt enough to know that he liked the Thai things in life, and spent 6 months here and 6 months back in NZ (much to the annoyance of his family he told me.) Another, Maya, an English gal with similar Indian visa problems, we bonded instantly in a shell service station late 1 evening...she was going back to help street kids and finish learning Hindi...I hope we meet up in India over the next few months...They say the journey is as important as the destination and in this case they would be right....Actually every1 I got talking to on that journey (4 times in total) was a really cool person. Beers were cracked open at strange times in the morning on top deck of the boat and the weather and scenery was all good...could have been a party cruise.

XTREME LIVING

jumping off cliffs, snorkelling with sharks, diving with xtreme hangovers etc etc...It all went on in Koh Tao. The only problem was balancing burning the candle at both ends. The partying was just as good as the daytime...Even if you just nipped out to 7-11 for an energy nasal stick (the Thais have this glued to their nostrils) you'd end up bumping into some1 and staying out all night drinking Sam Sang buckets at beach parties and jumping in the sea...Thankfully the more yoga I did, the less sleep I needed. The yoga was great here...learnt a Tibetan form called Yin yoga which involved staying in postures for 5 minutes....involved heavy concentration and stamina...was amazing. This gave me plenty of energy and therfore spare time to do a massage and reflexology course, and an emergency responder 1st aid course (been meaning to do that 1 for years) Practiced my new massage skills on the beach to willing victims...wasn't hard to get a volunteer 4 that 1, haha...Managed to perfect it and pin it down over the 2 weeks. Didn't want to get the wrong spot in reflexology, might cause internal rupture of the spleen and bleeding through the eyes...at least I have my new 1st aid skills to help tho : ) I was thinking about my previous career as a bar/venue manager has caused so much ill health, now I must subconsciously be trying to make up 4 this with all these healing skills I'm picking up. Weird....but it feels good anyway....and is addictive....(I think I just like getting certificates lol)

24 HOUR PATTAYA PEOPLE

So was going to spend some time on Koh Phagnan...but spent 2 hours there and turned back...Hat Rin, the main area, was a shithole like the aftermath of a party...and not good vibes at all....Didn't even head back for the 1/2 moon party in the jungle the following week...Koh Tao was rocking enough. However I really wanted to take in another beach place in Thailand b4 heading back. I decided on Pattya, much to the horror form every1 I spoke to in Koh Tao. Koh Taoites are purists, and I can't blame them as they are in paradise (speak to many of the expats on the island and their story is similar...I came here backpacking 7 years ago and just stayed) ...but I wanted to see the dark side of Thailand I had heard so much about...Pattya had it all. I've also been getting right into my scuba diving, especially into the adventurous dives, and I knew there was a great dive school in Pattya that specialised in shipwreck dives...so off I went for my last 24 hours in Thailand. I didn't believe how full on the sex tourism was here....it is a full on Thai red light beach district where anything goes. Nuff said...check it out yourselves if you're interested. Met some cool people there in a short space of time. Mermaids diving school rocks! The instructors have a good balance of professionalism and being nutters (think the place attracts them.) The shipwreck dive was out of this world...was v. funny to see the hardcore advanced lot going back down and in the wreck during ridiculously strong currents later in the afternoon. Wot a buzz!!! Then went off with my new pal Rik and ate bugs for tea...wonderful dining companion he was too (hope we stay in touch)...cockroachhes were the best...meaty and full bodied, your 5 star insect...earthworm tastes like shit tho...will leave you spitting and dribbling for the next hour hahaha...

In the next edition....

about to get my travelling companion and off to the famous OSho ashram in Pune, b4 taking in the interntational yoga championships at the end of the month in Mysore. Meeting up with old friends and my guru... I hope the partying in Thailand hasn't affected my balance hahaha. Anyway, will give it my best shot...wish me luck

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