Advertisement
Published: August 6th 2007
Edit Blog Post
Over twelve hours later, Gene and I woke up fully recharged and prepared to leave an impression on Phuket. We took an invigorating early morning swim and set out for our first bargain bonanza. Just minutes into our shopping spree, we came across a shoddy storefront advertising $400 Baht (approximately $12 USD) for a manicure and pedicure. Not minding an hour of pampering to start our day, we entered the makeshift day spa for a little indulgence.
Grinning at Gene as our feet were immersed into two bowls of lukewarm water, I tried to relax as the so-called nail artist doused the tools in alcohol. Expecting at least an amateur manicure and pedicure for the price, I grew tense in my seat as I watched the Asian girl buff the surface of my nails with a cheap emery board and sculpt the edges into the most uneven of shapes.
Several times throughout the next hour, I contemplated stopping the girl in the middle of her work to save what was left of my nails. Gene, who appeared content in the seat next to me, unknowingly dissuaded me from making a stink of the situation.
Afterward, as we made
reservations for two for the transvestite lip synching Cabaret, I could only imagine the scoffs I would receive from the girly boys if they caught a glimpse of my hands and feet. I was convinced that my five-year-old niece could have done a better job.
As always, you get what you pay for. Dolled up in my going-out attire, I wondered how may of the trannies would outshine me. While we knew that we were in for a show, we never anticipated the innumerous breast implants and flawless dance routines. The ease with which they moved across the floor in 3-inch heels was mind boggling. Then, there were those who enjoyed putting on the show for pure shock value, prancing about in their negligees and fishnet stockings, showing off their more feminine side. Little did we know, our show was nowhere near over at the end of the cabaret.
Gene and I headed for the main thoroughfare where thousands of people gathered to eat, drink and people watch. Lucky to grab a table from a group headed to their next bar, we copped a squat right in front of a platform of dancing girls, so I thought.
“Gene, look at that girl. That is the prettiest Asian that I’ve seen thus far,” I complimented, as another voice chimed in.
“Those are all dudes,” an Aussie accent informed me from the seat over.
“You’ve got to be kidding me?!? If that’s a dude, that’s the best looking dude I’ve ever seen!” I reciprocated.
As I observed with an inquiring eye, I grew more and more convinced of her true gender. Joining the Aussies and another Dutch couple, we gaped at the dancing queens and egged them on. Our jaws dropped as one of the girly boys flaunted her naked implants and pulled her panties aside to reveal her miracle surgery. Snap! “Too bad we can’t put that one in the blog,” I uttered.
Having had enough of the trannies to last a lifetime, we headed to the next bar with our new friends. We kept entertained as an Asian cocktail waitress hustled some tourists at a game of Connect Four at the bar. As I checked out my surroundings, I noticed the enormous bell hanging above my head. Without a moment’s hesitation, there I was obnoxiously ring-a-ling-a-linging the bell.
“Noooooooooooooooooooooo!” bellowed the
Aussie, pointing to the sign above the bar, which read in big block letters: “RING THE BELL AND BUY EVERYONE AT THE BAR A SHOT OR PAY $1000 BAHT.”
Oops! By the look on Gene’s face, I thought my vacation days were over. “I cannot f*ckin’ believe you just did that! I cannot f*ckin’ believe it!” he hollered.
“I didn’t see the sign,” I whimpered. “Just tell them that we don’t have any money,” I suggested as Gene was handing $1000 baht over the bar.
“That might be an option had I not just bought drinks two seconds ago,” Gene carped.
To my luck, the waitress brought over a round of shots for our group. “At least we got something out of it,” I argued. However, by that time, Gene was in no mood to down the blue concoction. Toasting the others with Gene sulking at my side, I apologized for my cranky husband and said my goodbyes.
Happy to be back in our own company, Gene proposed that we explore our surroundings. Catching sight of a mechanical bull, I darted toward the tent. Gene took a video as I struggled against my competitor, trying
my best to hold down my skirt -
another grand show that won’t make it into the blog. Determined to get the full Phuket experience, Gene and I decided to satisfy our curiosity at one of the local go-go clubs where several Thai girls danced in alternating black and white go-go boots along the L-shaped stage. We wondered what all the hype was about until the shift changed and three scantily dressed Asians climbed the stage and performed an erotic dance in sync. As Gene pulled out the camera, we were instantly reprimanded, “No photos!”
Yet another splendid affair that won’t make it into the blog.
Advertisement
Tot: 0.06s; Tpl: 0.01s; cc: 6; qc: 25; dbt: 0.0275s; 1; m:domysql w:travelblog (10.17.0.13); sld: 1;
; mem: 1.1mb
krankberg
non-member comment
woah
Are there any actual girls in Thailand or just trannies?