Exchange in Thailand #4: One Last Month

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Sometimes I forget that I am in a land that was once foreign to me. As my life here getting more routinized, the strangeness disappeared. I have accepted who I am to this place. To general people I am the foreigner whose Thai language skill comparable to a 3 year old kid. To the street food vendors I am the guy who eats soup noodles with no pig organs. To the security guard at my apartment, I am the guy who stay awake until 7am in the morning. I have gotten used to this routine and am comfortable with my lifestyle here, I do not know at which point I will feel bored of it. But I know that I will never get the chance to feel bored because I only have a month time left in this country before I continue school in another country. The fact that there is little time left for me to enjoy what it has to offer makes me cherish my time here even more.

I have been here for almost 4 months. There have been some changes on how I feel about the things around me. My favourite class has turned into one of my least anticipated class. The least favourite class at the beginning turns out to the one I made most friends and enjoy the most. Not all days here are filled with sunshine and rainbows, in terms of my mood. I do get bored, excited, depressed and calm in the span of one day. I have been feeling this wide range of emotions probably because my time here has not been fully occupied with productivity. I feel like a loser most of the time when I am not busy working. What kind of human I have evolved to become that feels depressed when not working.

I wonder if the rotty vendor or 7-11 employees will ever wonder where I go when I am gone, they see me almost daily but never know my name and what I do here. I am just an insignificant passerby in the neighbourhood, they are the busy people who earn honest money with their hard labours. who have time to care about where I disappear to?

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