It's More Fun In The Philippines part 3

---

AUSTRALIAN EMBASSY:
It's an early start today. According to the advice of our sniveling Sycophant at PAL - I MUST go to the Australian Embassy in Makati. Whilst not that far away in terms of distance, in Monday morning traffic it takes almost 2 hours to get there and we arrive shortly after 8:00am.

Car is checked at the driveway by armed guards with mirrors to look under the chassis and the interior of the car and luggage are given the once over by a sniffer dog. After being dropped off at the front entrance, i go through two security checks with pat downs and metal detectors etc. only to be told that the Australian Embassy does not open until 8:30 and that I need to leave the building.

At 8:30 I tell the concierge downstairs I need to attend to my visa issues and after filling in a form and handing over my Victorian Driver's License I'm given a pass and allowed upstairs. When I get there - there's another security check and pat down and I have to hand over my Laptop and Mobile Phone before being allowed to approach a stick glass screen to talk to someone.

I explain my situation to a young Filipina lass, who immediately says that there's NOTHING they can do and that I must proceed to the Dept of Immigration in Intramuros (10 minutes around the corner from the hotel where the day started).

It's at this point when i start asking questions I notice a trend with Filipinos in 'difficult' situations. I don't know if it's a cultural thing or a bureaucratic thing, but they NEVER answer a question if they don't like the answer - they simply answer a question they make up themselves. (Come to think of it - Squish does that too when we're bluing).

But wait..... There's More. . . . .
Before I'm allowed to depart, I now have to fill out a form (a full foolscap page) with all my details and the reason for my visit - I put down - to get zero assistance from your staff.

N.B. Through out this entire misadventure - the only other Aussie in sight was on my side of the counter and it looked like he was having a similar degree of success with these people.

Bureau of Immigration:


We head back past the hotel and arrive at the BoI. There's no parking so Arthur heads off awaiting my call to pick me up.

The second i approach the front door the problems start. A guard stops me - points at my legs and a sign above the door. There is no entry to the building wearing shorts. I have no long pants in the country and trying to buy a pair in my size is going to be a challenge.

I turn away and am about to call Arthur to pick me up when a guy calls from off to the side.
"Excuse Sir. . . . . You rent?????"
He's holding up a pair of ultra bright cyan blue trackkie dacks . . . . . . . . 70pesos. Apparently these are more appropriate than the long shorts I'm wearing. So be it.

I get inside and there's a queue that stretches the length of the room. This queue is to enable you to get a number for a queue to see someone. Finally I get a form to fill out, but when I ask for a biro to fill it out - I'm told I have to BUY one from one of the vendors around the place.

Form is filled out and now I'm waiting for my number to get called - almost an hour. I hand the form over which gets stamped and I'm issued with 4040pesos in fines and fees. Upon paying this I hand over the receipts and my passport to another official and told to return in 45 minutes. On returning the receipts, a letter saying I'm not wanted for any wrong doing by the law and my passport stamped with a new exit date are handed back to me and I'm free to return to my exile in the Philippines.

Interestingly, in the section where i was supposed to put my exact address (number, street, town, province etc) I simply put Silang (a municipality) and that seemed to suffice - no questions asked.

All in all - I probably spoke three sentences to officials in this place the rest of the process was automatic and without any complications. Pity they couldn't have been like this at the airport.

After returning my lovely trackkie dacks and calling Arthur, we head back to Taal and Silang via a historic church in the Spanish Quarter. The similarities to Vigan were not lost on me.

It would be less than gracious of me not to acknowledge Arthur and Jojo at this point.

I've really got to say that Arthur and Jojo are real gems. I guess you kinda hope that family sticks by you and all that, but I've only met them once before two years ago, they couldn't do enough to help and make what was an intolerable situation just a little more tolerable. The night before - they both joined me a a pub for a few beers (Arthur doesn't drink but made an exception). To enable an early start, Jojo slept on the floor of my hotel room, whilst Arthur slept in the car as there simply wasn't enough space for two to sleep on the floor. At no stage did either of them complain about anything and they both did their best to keep me positive.

Maraming Salamat Arthur and Jojo.

---