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"Give a man a fish, feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, feed him for a lifetime."
i am not fully sure how to describe the events that took place yesterday.. i only wish i had my camera..
the day started as most days in kathmandu seem to slightly bored of the place, strolling around the streets iv walked many times during my short stay, when, semi-expectantly i see a man iv spoken to on several occasions, Raksh, a local shoe shine who frequents the thamel area in search of shoes to shine and people to speak english with..
i met Rakesh on my first full day in nepal, at that stage i did not understand the nepali people, it caught me by surprise that when i declined a shoeshine, he asked if he could walk with me for a few minutes and we could speak English.. i accepted his request and we spoke for around 5 minutes before he continued on his way gratefully thanking me for the jaunted difficult conversation..
the next day i met Rakesh wandering the streets again, he greeted me with a massive smile and we repeated the process of
walking and chatting before he went back to trying to find work..
on my second day back in Kathmandu after 12days in the Everest region, i again saw him on the street, he greeted me as a long lost friend and asked if i remembered him, i told him i did and we stood, making small talk..
this process was repeated almost every day for the next 9 days..
when i spoke to Rakesh on the 10th day, yesterday, he was quick to excitedly ask me if i would come with him to see a temple he often goes to, Swayambhunath, it is near his home and is very famous then after that he insisted we go back to his home so i could meet his family and take tea..
before this encounter id come to the conclusion that nepali men genuinely want to bring their 'new friends' to their home so they can meet their family and share a meal with you.. they are incredibly proud of their family, and welcome you warmly and show generosity which, honestly, they are generally not in a situation which allows them to do so.. nether the less they
insist..
i agree to let Rakesh act as tour guide and host..
we start walking out of thamel, the tourist area where i am staying in kathmandu, as we walk past a person selling berries on the side of the road, i ask him what they are and before i could react he had ran over and purchased a small newspaper cup full.. they werent particularly nice, quite bitter and were mostly seed, but he was excited to get them and said he rarely buys such treats..
eventually make it to a microbus stop.. i really didnt feel like going a long way away but it was too late to change my mind now without offending and confusing him..
catching a nepali microbus is a whole experience in its self, your first sight of a bus coming reveals a guy leaning half from his waist out the window of a 12 seater bus yelling constantly the destination of the bus while banging his hand against the side of the van.. if the bus is going your way you flag it, the bus slows to walking pace and you jump on..
it is approximately this stage when you realise the
full extent of what a sardine experiences when they are squashed into a can..
when i first hopped in the bus there were, including Rakesh, the driver, the money guy and myself, 22 people on the bus (a 12 seater bus).. my seat was the 15cm isle gap between two chairs (luckily my bum was wide enough to get a bit on each seat).. as Rakesh and myself took the last two sitting positions i assumed the bus would keep going until some people hopped off..
i was wrong.. the guy kept yelling and banging the bus, and we stopped to allow 3 more people onto the bus.. they clambered aboard and stood in the door way, hunched over in positions not the slightest bit comfortable, nor practice.. being inside a 12seater bus with 24 other people was definitely an experience..
after about a 40minute bus ride rakesh signaled me and we clambered out.. it was nice to move and breath again..
we then walked around the temple which was quite impressive.. and he told me all sorts of information about it, mostly in very broken English, i came away little the wiser..
we then started the walk to his house, he told me of his two daughters who were at school, one of which it was their first day of school and his two younger sons who were at home with his wife..
the walk to his house took as to an area tucked away behind the larger buildings that lined the main streets..
nothing could have prepared me for rounding the corner of the fence which obscured the view overlooking a paddock where a shanty town had been built.. as we continued down the small hill towards the shacks i was lost for words.. i have seen pictures and videos of such places, but being there, was like nothing iv ever seen before..
Rakesh took me to his house, i was not expecting this, a small structure with split bamboo lattice making the frame with no wall coverings, several overlapping layers of different plastic materials lining the roof.. the total area was possibly 5mx5m, in this space was 2 wooden platforms, beds for him, his wife and his 4 children.. a small fireplace for cooking over, small shelves containing a few bottles of spices for cooking, some pots, pans and plates and beside it a stack of timber..
inside was his wife and two boys, they all greeted me with a warm 'namaste' pressing their hands together and bowing their heads slightly (nepali greeting)..
i was invited to sit on a bed platform and make my self comfortable, i was informed that his home is my home while he fussed over me until i finally convinced him that i was comfortable.. when he ran off and returned with a glass of water, i was forced to decline and informed him that as im not used to drinking the water here it would make me very sick..
within minutes of sitting down 5 or 6 adults and about 15 children had come to his house to say "namaste" to me and then carried on their way..
his children were extremely cute and happy, running around as young children do, one of them was quick to latch onto me claiming me as his friend and not leaving my side during my stay.
at one point i had let the boy wear my sunglasses when another visitor took them, put them on and jokingly said goodbye the small boy got really worried and upset that he was leaving with my glasses protesting loudly and trying to hit the man..
Rakeshs' wife set to brewing us some milk masala tea..
during my travels i have become aware that every shoeshine/shoe repair man carry's a box, this box contains everything they need to carry out repairs to, as well as clean shoes.. Rakesh however carried an old backpack containing 2 brushes and two tins of polish..
i ask him why he does not have a box? he is hesitant to answer.. after a bit of prompting i finally got him talking, he told me that he used to have a box, and business was very good.. he used to setup outside of temples and was able to earn a good wage which allowed him to send his children to school, feed the family every day, and pay rent for his shanti as well as save what was left.. he told me he could earn as much as 600nepal rupees per day (about $8)..
i started promoting him to tell me what had happened that changed this.. he was clearly embarrassed by his current situation.. eventually i got him to open up and he informed me that 3months ago his box had been stolen, he had to spend a big chunk of his savings on a 2 new brushes and 2 tins of polish which was the bare minimum he could work with.. his income instantly dropped from around 600rupee per day to 60rupee (about 80cents).. i asked how he survived on that.. he said he had already paid for his daughters to go to school, so they could still go, however, all his savings had gone to rent.. and he was living day to day, sometimes he could buy food for everyone, sometimes just the children, sometimes their neighbors helped them and gave them food.. (not that their neighbours were any better off..) he went on to tell me that within the community he lived in, everyone helped each other, when he was doing better he would often help other people with food and this was a common occurrence..
the masala tea was very delicious and his wife was very happy that i liked it.. they then insisted that i have lunch with them and she ran off to get some food.. saying no is not an option, the quicker you finally agree the less painful it is for everyone.. however it is always awkward when you KNOW they are not in a situation to afford themselves let alone feed you..
while lunch was being prepared i asked for a tour of the village.. there was possibly around 150 shantis in the paddock.. he took me to see the work some NGOs (non government organisations) had done in their area, including a block of 4 toilets and a room with a bucket for washing, before these had been built, he said, there was no option but to use the grass part of the paddock out in the open for both toilet and washing, which was in plain view of anyone and very degrading to everyone.. he also showed me some wells that the NGOs had put there, two clean water stations for the villagers to use for washing, cleaning, drinking etc..
on the tour i met the local school teacher, a guy who lived nearby who works in conjunction with the NGOs providing early education/daycare to children from the village who were too young for school..
on returning to Rakesh house, his wife had made us some incredibly deicious chapati bread for lunch..
it was about this time i started questioning why he had not got a new shoe shine box.. defeated, he told me his savings were gone to rent and living and a new box was very expensive.. i asked about second hand boxes.. they are available but also very expensive.. he said a new setup would be around 20000rupees ($280) and second hand 14000rupees ($200).. i was honestly shocked at how much they were.. he told me his best bet was one day to try and go to india where they were much cheaper and bring one back..
by this stage i had decided i wanted to help Rakesh and his family, how though? give him a months rent so he can have a chance to get some savings? his roof leaked massively and monsoon was coming.. perhaps new plastic for his roof? then i was remembered the saying "Give a man a fish, feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, feed him for a lifetime." it was clear i needed to help him with shoeshine equipment so then he had the means to help himself and his family on an ongoing basis..
after lunch i told him i wanted to help.. he was hesitant.. he is a proud man, but knew that he needed help and could not turn it down.. we set off to track down a supplier of shoe equipment.. we looked at many available options and the one which caught my eye was a complete second hand setup which had come from india, it consisted of two boxes with a large number of different polishes, colours, tools, laces and replacement soles shoe parts.. everything a shoeshine needs.. i talked price with the dealer and managed to agree that a fair price would be 10000rupee ($140) if i wanted it..
i was still hesitant.. a lot of money to give away, but then i started putting it in perspective, i have spent that in a drunken night out and only got a hangover in return.. i thought about it for a few minutes, a drunken nights expenses could provide an exceptionally nice and generous man a livelihood which he could in turn provide for his family.. the answer was obvious it was no longer even a question..
Rakesh understandably was lost for words.. his eyes were welling with tears..
by this stage it was late in the day and i had to get back to thamel, he escorted me back on the microbus, (again a wonderful experience..) the whole way back he sat silently.. he still had a disbelieving look on his face.. he told me he would come to thamel the next day to see me before i leave the day after, but after that he would go back to his old spot at the temple..
as we parted ways we shook hands, as i let go he threw his arms around me and gave me a massive hug smiled and then went on his way..
night time came, i was laying in bed thinking, and being the disgustingly logical person i am i had to evaluate all possibilities of the days events.. and the unfortunate thought came over me, what if, somehow, it had been a scam.. i pondered the question for some time.. and decided that i would have rather given $140 to a possible scammer than to have denied an honest person the chance to rebuild their life.. i was glad to sort that out and push that negative thought from my head..
this morning i came out of my guesthouse and saw Rakesh walking down the street.. he spotted me and his face lit up.. he was proudly sporting his box of equipment and looked like a new man.. he said he wanted to take me to breakfast.. so went down a narrow alley to where a lady had a small local kitchen setup and we had tea, omlet and chapati..
he said he still could not believe what had happened informed me that all his worries had been lifted..
he took something from his pocket.. he presented me with a tacky blue bead bracelet with the words "best friend"..
after breakfast we walked back to the area where my guest house was, i ran inside to get my camera, an old rain jacket i no longer wanted, an 'english basics' book i had got for him, as well as 2 colouring books and some crayons i had picked up for his boys..
i will never forget meeting Rakesh and him taking me into his life.. despite having nothing and not being able to feed himself he wanted to welcome me with tea and food showing generosity at a level i have never before experienced.. i still have no words to describe how i feel about what happened yesterday..
after writing this i saw Rakesh out on the street at the end of his first day with his new box.. he excited hurried over to me wearing the oversized raincoat i gave him he showed me his hands.. stained with polish he excitedly told me he had already made 500rupees, he invited me back to his house for dinner to celebrate, unfortunately i had to decline in order to organise my self to fly out tomorrow.. he again gave me an unexpected hug, we said our goodbyes and parted ways..
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I'm very proud of you, you are a wonderful man and you have helped a whole family hopefully for life.