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Published: July 30th 2006
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Silence is golden We have fled the stench and noise of Phnom Penh. Now we find ourselves in the relative tranquility of Laos. We arrived yesterday after another epic bus journey, and Laos is a refreshing change from the other countries we’ve visited so far. People seem to be warmer, more genuine and there is much less traffic. We love it!
Our travelling companions On Cambodian buses we had to endure an endless supply of awful pop music. The rail network is even worse than the roads, so buses are popular. Unfortunately, on any long-haul journey in Cambodge, the driver puts on a DVD of one of two things: slapstick comedy sketches, or a relentless chain of karaoke music videos from Cambodia’s answer to Robbie Williams. The former option cracks up the locals. The latter makes them nod along in quiet satisfaction. Indie and I found the music hilarious - not only were the videos extremely budget, not to mention cheesy, but the singer thought it was cool to chant random, nonsensical words in English. How about this for a chorus?
Oh what a pity pity
Do you happy happy?
Don’t cry, don’t cry! Total
gibberish. It was just noise. There was another song that we heard time and again - a romantic number: after singing mostly in Khmer, the guy claims:
“I love you, loving you
As the mouse so loves the rice
I miss you, missing you
As the mouse so loves the rice” Although most of the locals were completely oblivious to the meaning, they lapped it up!
On our frequent travels we have also noticed the following:
*When we missed a bus in one Cambodian city, we managed to get two places on a bootlegged ‘taxi’ operation, negotiated by a tout. He spoke good English and assured us that his uncle would be the driver. We asked his uncle’s name - “Mr Chay” apparently. He also warned us as the taxi was about to set off, in no uncertain terms, that his uncle “really didn’t like foreigners”.
*In Cambodia we travelled around 1,300 km.
*In many Asian countries drivers like to beep the horn incessantly. Apparently this is done ‘to warn other road users of their presence’. I struggle to comprehend this reasoning - surely other road users can SEE one another? I think it
actually has a different meaning, like - “this vehicle is in motion”.
*Yesterday we journeyed from the Cambodian border to the town of Pakse by pick-up truck. The driver obviously tries to cram as many people as possible on-board, as this is more profitable for him. Sadly yesterday we were joined by the world’s smelliest man. I know I wrote about a rank-smelling taxi driver last week, but that guy smelled like roses compared to...... FISHMAN! This man, and his wife and small children, were transporting a massive bucket of something truly hideous. I think it was a blend of dog turds, rotten vegetables, raw fish and sewage. Why they were carrying this, I don’t know. Although his children seemed comparatively clean, Fishman himself was revolting. To my horror, he disconcertingly decided to grab my leg while laughing heartily when we said hello. He did not seem to catch on to my non-verbal clues as I inched increasingly further away from him. Indeed, later he insisted on listening to my iPod. I thought it would be rude not to oblige. Fortunately he didn’t seem to like Coldplay’s “X&Y” so I was spared his awful proximity. When we finally waved
goodbye to Fishman’s pungent smells I was overjoyed.
A conspicuous lack of hygiene Fishman merely serves to confirm what I already suspected. Personal hygiene levels are shockingly low in this part of the world.
Now I know what you are thinking - come on Ian, have a heart - these countries are desperately poor so it’s not surprising that people view earning a living as more important that washing regularly and using soap.
But I say to you - that reasoning doesn’t cut it. When I was travelling through Latin America I saw many people living in abject poverty, none of whom smelled bad. In fact I don’t recall meeting anyone there who didn’t make an effort to dress well and appear respectable. In Colombia, people would shower three or four times a day.
Here, you go to a seemingly good restaurant and you find no soap in the bathroom. Not even at the kitchen sink. People will peel fruit and place it on a filthy work surface or a dirty bus seat, then eat it. Market traders will transport chopped raw meat and fish in the same containers on buses. In markets you
see raw chicken next to raw fish next to nuts that people eat as snacks. Now tell me if that’s hygienic.
Chancers Unfortunately we have had even more run-ins with chancers - people on the search for a quick buck. Methods of fishing for money are becoming increasingly ridiculous. At the Cambodian border post, the immigration officials stamped our passports with the departure confirmation. They then half-heartedly remarked “now you pay one dollar each”. When we asked why, given that we had already paid for both the Cambodian and Lao visas, they said “one dollar each for stamp fee”. When we politely declined, they smiled at each other, completely giving the game away. Some travellers must fall for this. On entering Laos we had to pay a $3 ‘overtime fee’ because it was a Saturday. Just two days earlier we had paid $50 for the Lao visa itself. You ask yourself where this $3 actually goes. I wonder...
I had hoped to upload photos of an ancient Khmer temple, a 100-metre high waterfall and some indigenous Lao communities. Unfortunately we couldn’t see any of the above cos it’s been raining almost constantly for the last 24
hours, so the tour we had planned on doing was cancelled this morning. Instead, I leave you with Indie’s images of our border crossing, and with his informed opinion on
education in China :
“What is education? I guess this is a question with many answers, none of which are simple. For me, education should encourage creative thought, self expression and all that crap... The Chinese education system is doing exactly the opposite. It is suppressing it’s youth into nothing but robots... mere machines... who are only able to regurgitate previously memorised information. Stand me in front of a class of 100 Chinese 18 year-olds who can’t tell you what they think or even how they feel about anything. This is one of the few things that takes my heart away.”
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Alex
non-member comment
Ian, I am very happy for you, as it seems you are enjoying while in South east Asia. Here in China we also have the song about the mouse (laoshu ai da mi = mouse loves big rice) but I am not sure about the origin. Disfruta tu viaje y hasta pronto, Alex