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Published: July 19th 2006
Hidden Gem
A waterfall near the town of Mito."Go-Go Gadget Bitch Slap!" screams our protagonist, Captain James T. Kirk* as a hand extends from the top of his head to deliver a downward, open-palm smack across the face of his evil landlord neighbour, Mr. Stinkydickface**. The slap sends him reeling backwards, crashing hard into his computer (which was later found to contain vast amounts of child pornography and stolen credit card numbers).
"Shoulda bought a muzzle, bitch." lectures Capt. Kirk to his arch-nemesis, as he motions for the enraged mob of sleep-deprived citizens awaiting outside to enter the premises and lynch the irritating dog that has been waking them up at 5:00am again.
The mob tears through the house, breaking through rice paper walls to get at the incessantly barking animal. The dog, sensing impending doom, transforms into a space ship and blasts off, escaping through the roof before the crowd can reach him.
In the home, Mr. Stinkydickface was dealt with very harshly, in a manner that defies the Geneva Convention. Suffice to say, all is silence again in Masuda.
Note: The preceding was a somewhat accurate recollection of events loosely based on fact that occurred in Masuda recently.
*All names were changed
Coastal
Along the Sea of Japan coast near Hagi, where all the surfers like to hang out. to protect the anonymity of the parties involved, and all conversations were translated for your reading convenience.*
**Mr. Stinkydickface is, in fact, his real name.**
In other news...
On the north-eastern outskirts of the city is an area that has a couple of nice beaches suitable for swimming. Denise and I have been spending lots of time there lately, playing in the surf and getting sunburned. But the other day we noticed a few jellyfish floating near shore, and were too chicken to go in the water. That is, until a couple of 4-year-old children ran past wearing water wings...so we decided to stop acting like sissies and eventually waded in after them.
With the summer weather starting to roll in, we've been trying to make the most of our weekends by taking off to some unknown town with an obscure landmark attraction. It's a little hit-and-miss at the moment as the rain seems to persist on the weekends, but we can usually salvage one good day. But considering Shimane is in the midst of record-setting rainfall and rather severe flooding (and other such natural disasters that follow wet weather) it's usually pretty nice during the
Serenity
Even mermaids like to float on tubes every now and then. daytime.
Denise is in the middle of re-contracting woes as her employer is trying to switch schools on her; but she's standing firm and refusing to give up her postings (contractually, she's not obliged to, either). And me...well, I'm not up to much really (as you may have noticed). I hope to be venturing out on my own soon on a few day trips, once the skies clear up a bit. For now I'm just happy to get a good nights sleep. That dog next door has been awfully quiet lately...
Camille & Denise
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Feiko
non-member comment
Are you sure your getting enough sleep?
Man... I laughed for a good bit after the rant at the beginning. I can't really tell... is the dog bothering you? and by the way.. I'd be scared of jelly fish too!