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So we arrived in Japan following 2 days on the boat from Shanghai. A boat built to carry hundreds carrying no more than 30. Six or seven of whom were not Chinese of which four or five were nationals of the UK or Eire. As we were leaving Shanghai we met Dave and Jo out on the deck and stood in a glaring Chinese sun for three hours discussing the things you discuss when you meet people doing a similar journey to yourselves. By the time we stopped talking Vik was well and truly burnt despite the factor 40, and I was slightly delusional from sun stroke.

Unfortunately Vik missed the highlight of the trip - a karaoke bar with four sea-sick Chinese singers churning out toneless, depressing Chinese elevator ballads to an empty bar (except for a collection of 4 bemused Westerners too stingy to pay 50p to attempt Wuthering Heights or anything by Sisters of Mercy (there you go Dave - they got a mention!)

We'd already decided that having been through every major city en-route to Japan, when we did finally make it to the Land of Neon we were heading straight for the fresh air of the Japanese Alps and the seclusion of Hakuba. It was a cracking decision.

After seven hours on the amazing Japanese trains, we arrived at K's Hostel in Hakuba to find that we were two of only three people staying there. During our five day stay the number of residents never topped five. (Other than an entire baseball team who arrived so late and left so early that we only heard them and saw their shoes.) The hostel is ultra-modern with exceptionally good facilities for a hostel and the two staff were superb, doing everything they could to make sure we enjoyed our stay and could plan the rest of our stay in Japan. It was an excellent introduction to Japan.

The girl at reception mentioned to me and fellow guest Will that there was a Thanks Giving dinner one night that her friend was throwing - would we like to go? Both Will and I had visions of a traditional Japanese meal with only the three of us being treated as guests in some old Japanese ladies house. We loved the idea and jumped at the chance.
Will is a little like me - we are both lead by our stomachs and both jump at the chance to try anything that sounds remotely "traditional". So we were both initially a little miffed that our Japanese experience turned out to be a Canadian Thanks Giving dinner hosted by a Kiwi in another local hostel. I don't think either of us even realised that Canada had a Thanks Giving! The dinner was served at a long table and about fifty people, consisting mainly of Westerners who are living in Japan but who had come to Hakuba as a weekend break, tucked into a dinner of turkey, cranberry jelly, mashed potato and pasta (?).

We were half way through the meal, conversation flowing much the same as the wine, when Will leaned over to me and whispered, "Am I imaging it or are there quite a large number of lesbians in here?". I looked around me and realised that, indeed, there did seem to be a large number of female couples. We were to later find out that a 30 strong lesbian party had arrived from Tokyo that day. This in a tiny place where we thought we were the only Westerners for miles. As it turned out, fate had smiled on us and the whole thing was obviously meant to be as one of the girls suggested that Vikki and I go to a town called Nikko to see traditional Japan. When we arrived in Nikko some days later there happened to be an annual festival on... but that's for another blog.

Having only been in the country a day, our Lesbian Canadian Thanks Giving was our first introduction to life in Japan.
Actually, before that meal, Vik, Will and I had decided that despite the rain (it rained solidly for the first four days we were in Hakuba) we would attempt to walk to the top of the nearest mountain. We had been told that there was some sort of Mushroom Festival taking place at the cable car station half way up the mountain so (bearing in mind our shared passion for food and the touristy need to see all things "traditionally" Japanese, this seemed like too good an opportunity to miss. So we took the cable car to the station and found a canteen with a few soaked walkers tucking into bowls of free mushroom soup. Again it wasn't quite what we'd imagined. However, rather bizarrely, next to the vat of mushroom soup there was an eletronic roulette machine and we were each invited to press the button and win a prize. Vik and Will both won apples and I won a bag of rice. The whole thing was a bit weird.

The first thing that I noticed about Japan and something that is still a constant source of amusement for me is the vending machines. These things are everywhere. On every street corner, outside people's homes, in cities, in the countryside, vending machines are an ever present constant in Japan. I want to know who is servicing these machines? There are millions of them! Who has the job of refilling them? I just don't get it...

Lastly, since this blog has been so factual and verging on the point of being like a normal adult minds diary entry, I'd like to talk about toilets and monkey poo.

The toilets here are superb. I remember watching Blue Peter or Tomorrow's World or something as a kid and seeing these toilets with a button panel on them that allows you to adjust the seat temperature, allows you to send a jet of water towards your unmentionables and has an electronic flush noise. I thought that was all just the stuff of myth. The sort of thing that didn't really exist except in the conceptual mind of some lunatic in some far off country. Well lo and behold, this magnificent machine does exist and is everywhere in Japan! The sensation of a warm seat takes some getting used to but it is strangely comforting. You could spend a lot of time there. My advice to any travellers thinking of experimenting with the "Spray" or "Bidet" options - check the temperature and pressure settings before activating... My first venture was... indescribable... as some bugger had set the temperature to a little more than warm and the presssure to fire hose levels. I don't think I need to say anymore!

On the subject of toilets - as you will see from our pictures we went to see the Bathing Monkeys near Nagano. These very cute creatures are clever enough to copy humans and now actually take baths in the hot springs. But while they have mastered the bathing element of bathroom life, I think they need to work on the lavatory side of things. Its amazing that such small, cute creatures can produce such a large, highly smelly (someone should check their diet) amount of poo. My proudest moment of the trip so far was slipping in Monkey Poo. For all the new world experiences we're having, the idea that my shoe is covered in Monkey Poo is by far the most amusing to me. Its a personal thing. Vik found it amusing for a minute or two - it keeps me constantly entertained. I'm laughing just thinking about it.

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