Where is the Peace for Women?

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Tanzania may enjoy peace throughout its communities and society in general, but within intimate partner relations, violence is abundant. Having researched and analyzed policies and programs on violence against women in this country for the past several years, I am well aware that prevalence of physical and sexual violence that women experience at the hands of their partner is quite high, at around 40 percent.

But witnessing these acts of violence--as I did the other night--is quite another thing.

I was out having dinner with new Tanzanian female friends in a nice neighborhood of Dar, enjoying the discussion. They were telling me that young women these days exchange sex for gifts or money so that they can buy fancy phones, clothes and cars--a phenomenon called transational sex in the HIV field--thus, driving the HIV epidemic.

Still, a lot of our discussion made me optimistic about the development of Tanzania. These women were strong, educated women--one with a PhD and leading the health program of the Tanzanian branch of one of the largest development NGOs in the world; another an investment banker, and one with an MBA and recently the director of a student exchange and development program in Tanzania. One spoke candidly about insisting on a new partner being tested for HIV before she has sex with him. Another told me that she quickly became a top seller at a cold-calling gig she picked up while studying in London. The other spoke with conviction about the influx of investment and foreign companies or organizations in Tanzania, which has driven up the price of real estate and making so much housing unaffordable to Tanzanians.

Their bravado was encouragng to me. Until I saw it completely deflated, along with my own, by a single act of violence.

Satiated with food and wine, all of a sudden we heard a commotion at a table behind us. We turned to see a man yanking a woman by the hair and demanding that he leave with her. Everyone around us, including ourselves, stared in wonder. We stood and looked around to see if anyone would come to her help. We marveled and proclaimed it unbelievable that not one of her friends sitting with her tried to protect her. Finally, we became irate when it took at least a full five minutes before the staff of the hotel tried pullng the violent man away from the then crying, disheveled and surely bruised women. And this was only after he fully started hitting her in the face.

These are the very isseus I came to Tanzania to work on. Yet, there I was, feeling helpless. I kept looking around for a bouncer or the police. But this is Tanzania, I remembered. The acceptance of violence against women is quite the norm--not unlike many other places. I was later told that people probably thought it was their "private" business, or that she was a prostitute. Somehow, that made it right?

I wanted to step in mysefl, but I was sure I would get punched, too. If I were a man or bigger, would I think differently? Maybe not. So, should I have used my kickboxing skills to take him down? I'm really not sure. For now, I continue with designing media and training programs to change social norms that support the acceptance of violence.

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Comments

[Donavan]

Common thing
Even though I feel bad for the woman, violence against woman is not only prevalent in TZ but in the Caribbean too. I've witnessed it on many occasions while growing up in Jamaica. I've always wonder if violence against woman is more prevalent in former colonial countries b/c of the powerlessness men have experienced in those countries during colonial rule. And although these countries are "free", the effects of colonialism still exist and affect the every day life of people. Sad to say, b/c men feel powerless in these societies, the only way they can regain their power is within their home and violence against woman is just their way of regaining their power. Is it right? No! But you have to get to this deeper issue.