making atkins proud

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there is a restaurant in nairobi that is rated one of the top 50 in the world. it's called carnivore and it's famous for, you guessed it, meat.

vegetarians, read no further.

the meal starts off with soup and bread. who do they think they are dealing with? like i'm gonna be stupid enough to fill up on bread? i had a few spoons of soup to taste and waited.

next comes the two-tiered plate with sauces for the meat on top and salads on the bottom. on the middle of the top plate goes the flag. as long as the flag is up, they will keep serving you.

then, you wait again. over comes the first server with a big skewer of something. "what is it?" "spare ribs" "ok, one." he puts a rib on my plate and goes. yum. then another guy comes over. "what is it?" "chicken." no thanks. he goes to the next table. next. "camel." bring it on! not bad, a little tough. next. "crocodile. it goes with the garlic sauce." definitely. also pretty good. next. "beef." ok, a little of the red. (no spaghetti). next. "chicken liver with onion." ok, one. then, "chicken gizzard." one please.

and, it goes just on like this until you can't eat anymore and put down the flag. i tried most everything and made a list of everything i ate, just like i made a list on safari of every animal i saw. the three exotic meats on the menu that night were camel, ostrich and crocodile. there is a ban on hunting other animals because it is mating season.

most everything was good, but the king of all the meats was ostrich. it just melts in your mouth. it was prepared two ways, ostrich on a skewer and ostrich meatballs. the meatballs are made from wild ostrich that were hunted. their meat is very tough so they can't put it on a skewer. the skewered meat was from a farm. man, delish.

it's hard to describe the level of full you feel. it's like food is backed up all the way to your throat and you can't swallow anymore.

well, until they bring over the warm pineapple pie with ice cream.

i ate the whole thing...

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