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Published: August 10th 2007
Please, let me carry that bowling ball
Another happy scene from ancient Egypt, Philae temple, AswanAfter a thoroughly uncomfortable, frustrating, and disheartening morning (just being honest!) we had to quickly regain some sight seeing energy. Believe me, it was the last thing we felt like doing! But with a bit of grace, we put our bags into our room at our hotel in Aswan and jumped onto a minibus, together with 2 Colombians and 2 Spaniards, to set off on our tour of Aswan.
Our first stop was the High Dam, built right across the Nile. It was built partly to regulate the unpredictable flooding of the Nile, and at the same time provide huge amounts of lovely hydroelectricity to Egypt (and causes several environmental problems upstream as well!) It's an impressive engineering feat, but not much of a tourist attraction. The view from the top of the dam isn't all that impressive, and I'm not sure at all why it was included in our tour! But after our first few days of trying circumstances, we were happy just to go along with whatever was offered, as long as we weren't being ripped off (unknowingly) or having things stolen! Our 4 companions were equally cruisy, walking slowly, speaking in Spanish amongst themselves, and chain smoking.
Pharoah's bed
Philae temple, Aswan Next stop was the Isis temple at Philae, which was much more exciting. The entire temple complex was originally located nearby it's current site, but spent most of it's time underwater! Tourists would take boats and look down through the Nile at the temple. That would have been pretty cool! But with water levels rising from the dam, Unesco organised to dismantle the entire thing and reassemble it on a nearby island (above water). Cool, eh? We took a little motor boat out to the island across the Nile, and it was nice being next to the water when the ambient temperatures were around 40 degrees. Still, our Egyptian guide insisted (as most Egyptians seemed to in blistering hot weather) that this was a "good" day, and not a "hot" one.
We had a quick tour from our guide (not too many comprehensible phrases from him) and were left to wander around for a few minutes. The buildings on the island are from as early as 300 BC, and seem remarkably intact for something that spent a lot of it's time submerged. It was very picturesque - the sandy, weathered stone, clear blue sky and aqua blue of
Bougainvillea
Philae temple, Aswan the Nile. Beautiful.
We were glad to get back to the hotel for a bit of head space. The next morning we were leaving at 3:30am (and this is supposed to be a holiday!) to take a bus to Abu Simbel which, after the recommendations of Kit and Dave (sis and bro in-law), was highly anticipated. That night we went to a nearby pizza restaurant, and tucked into some good Egyptian style pizza, including a sweet pizza, stuffed with coconut and sultanas, and covered with glaceed cherries, peanuts, pistachios... lots of high GI energy!
Well, I had an awful sleep that night. I spent a good deal of time tossing and turning, as you do when you know you have to get a good night's sleep. By the time 2:30am came around, I had probably not slept more than a couple of hours, but up we got, packed our bags quickly, and stumbled downstairs to pick up our breakfast box and wait for the bus to arrive. In the foyer we bumped into some Kiwis who turned out to be Christians, and something about finding two people who shared what is most important to Elle and I, early
that morning, far away from home, was really encouraging.
I forgot to mention that during the night I was up (at least once... hazy memory now) making friends with the toilet bowl with some very soft stool... diarrhoea. Sorry if you didn't want to know that, but it is important for the next part of the story. Sitting in the foyer looking into my breakfast box, I decided to play it safe and just drink water. I think it was a good idea to avoid the boiled egg.
The bus was late, but in we climbed, together with our 2 Colombian compadres. It was a 15-seater minibus - can I emphasise "mini"? In the back two rows was an Indian family - mum, dad, 2 kids, and granddad. Our next stop was a hotel by the Nile to pick up the 2 cruisy Spaniards from the day before, as well as 2 others. And this, my friends, is where the drama began, and the worst bus trip of my life commenced!
When we stopped off at this hotel, the dad from the family at the back began piping up about how unhappy he was with the bus
arrangement. Apparently he had organised with a fella from Amigo tours (our tour company) to have a private bus for him and his family. As it was, they were sharing a bus with 10 others, and as he mentioned quite audibly to the rest of us, one of them was a fat woman! It was the kind of situation you know was going to be a funny story the next day, but in the moment, was cringe material. We were stopped at that hotel for about 20 minutes as he demanded to speak to the man who had sold him the bus ride. "Sorry, he's 30 minutes away" he was told, "speak to him on the phone." "No! I will not speak to him on the phone! Tell him to get over here right now!" This barrage persisted between a very rude and angry man and 3 Egyptians from Amigo tours, while the rest of us watched on in silence. I'm not sure how it ever got resolved, but we eventually headed off - and drove for about 5 minutes before stopping with a massive group of buses to wait for the convoy to get going.
Footnote - following
a few terrorist attacks aimed at tourists in Egypt, tourists must now travel in police convoy on the roads between Luxor, Aswan, and Abu Simbel. I'm not sure how many armed escorts there are, but there aren't many relative to the huge numbers of buses they are escorting. Rather than being protective, it certainly does seem to make it a lot easier for any attack to happen!
Anyway - after about 20 minutes, the convoy got going. Not long into the trip, I started feeling ill, and began breaking out in a fever. I was hot, but feeling cold, sweating, and light headed. So, cramped into the third row of the bus, I struggled to find a comfortable position on Elle's shoulder. And then the bus driver decided to pull out a cigarette, and within seconds, the family up the back was onto it. "Driver! Driver! Oi!" They got the attention of the passengers sitting next to the driver. "Tell that driver to put out that cigarette right now! That is disgusting! I am going to vomit! If you do not put that cigarette our right now I am going to vomit!" You can imagine, sitting in the back
Hotter than it looks
Temple of Hathor, Abu Simbel row, the volume required to transmit to the front row in an old minibus powering along an Egyptian highway. The Spaniard next to me, a gentle and relaxed guy, turned around, and offered "everyone in Egypt smokes." I winced, waiting for the inevitable outburst. "I don't care! I will vomit if he smokes. Do you want me to vomit over you?" Spaniard silenced. The driver apologised, put out the cigarette, and there was peace.
By the time we made it to Abu Simbel some three and a half hours later, Egypt was the last place I wanted to be. My joints were aching, and I was still running a fever. My bowels were also rumbling. I stumbled out of the bus, and went straight to the toilet. OK, let's do Abu Simbel! It felt as if I was sleepwalking, walking around a great mound (which looks a lot like Broken Hill) to the temple of Ramses II, which is on the other side of this mound, just by the Nile. I have to say I wasn't in the best shape to appreciate it, but it looking back at it now, it really is a stunning sight. The scale is
Great hypostyle hall
Karnak temple, Luxor grand and the setting is awesome. The artwork across every wall inside is incredible. It was Elle's favourite Egyptian sight. But while Elle walked around, I found a spot inside the temple, put my head against an ancient pylon, and did my best to fall asleep.
Elle came back, and with some gentle encouragement (what a wife!) took me on her own little guided tour of the temple. We moved on to the Temple of Hathor next door (not quite as impressive, but very cool still), and after a few minutes, I left Elle again to find a toilet. Bowels emptied, it was time to get back to the bus for the trip back. In 40-45 degree heat, in the same cramped conditions, with the same group of people, the air-conditioning broke down about 10 minutes into our trip. Again, there was a noisy barrage from the back, something about how the driver should stop the car and fix the air-con, but I felt too ill to care. I was again trying to find comfort on Elle's shoulder, and in my feverish state, making her very hot in the process!
I'm not sure what it was the next
time, but something else triggered another verbal attack from the back row, and this time our cruisy Colombian friend offered "would you stop screaming? We're trying to get some sleep here, but we can't because of your screaming." You can imagine the amicable response.
Well, it was as if every minute was an hour on the way back, and even once we got back into Aswan town, the trip to our hotel seemed to take forever. Two thoughts at this point - both trips on the bus were terrible, but with the air-con breakdown, the trip back takes the cake as the worst bus trip of my life (beating India, where I travelled for about five hours lying in the luggage compartment above the seats, and also beating a certain bus trip in Rwanda last year...). Second thought - I have to applaud the Indian granddad, who endured both trips in cramped conditions without a word of complaint! Hats off!
Nevertheless, getting out of that bus was one of the happiest moments of my life, and it was straight to the toilet for me again. It was after lunchtime, and all I wanted was to drink sweet stuff
Detail of column
Great hypostyle hall, Karnak temple and lie back in a chair, which is exactly what I did for the next few hours. That afternoon we caught a train to Luxor (three hours). The train itself was much better - the seats were big and reclined fully, the aircon was fierce, but my bowels weren't happy. You can imagine toilets on Egyptian trains aren't five star, and a few trips had my thighs working hard to support myself above the bowl. About the third time in there (and by no means done with business) I hear a knock on the door and Elle worriedly saying "Kev, this is our stop!" Not at all getting myself completely clean, I hurriedly finished up, and ran out the door. We got off at Luxor.
A chirpy fella called Mohammed (who loved to say "That's greeeeet" (great)) met us on the platform (Amigo tours did the meeting up thing really well!) and we got into a bus which took us to our hotel in Luxor. We sat down in the foyer, but as he began explaining our itinerary for the next few days, the belly rumblings began again, and I was off. Relieved, we retreated to our room, where
I went straight for the bed - gosh that bed felt good! Elle had dinner on her own that night. I was up in the room, alternating between sleeping and the occasional runny movement. I have to say, I can't imagine what it would have been like if my bowels had been playing up on that bus trip to Abu Simbel. Truly, a nightmare.
By noon the next day, the fever had resolved (the bowels following slowly) and I felt a lot better. Well enough to continue our adventures. That afternoon's sight seeing took us to Karnak temple and Luxor temple on the east coast of Luxor. Karnak temple especially is very impressive, and it was a great afternoon. Our guide spoke English well, and worked his way through some well-rehearsed jokes amidst the historical commentary. That evening, I took my first meal for about 2 days, some minestrone soup at the Mercure hotel, and all was well!
The next morning we were up early, and visited the west bank of Luxor. The Valley of the Kings was first, which was the place where the pharaohs built their tombs and were buried. I really enjoyed this place. There's
not much on the outside, but that was precisely the point - to hide these tombs, and the mummies and treasures they contained, from tomb robbers (most of the tombs were robbed anyway!) The tombs themselves are fantastic, very Indiana Jones, and some of the stories behind the discovery of these tombs (especially Tutankhamen's) are fascinating. The rest of the morning took us to the Valley of the Queens (a similar deal to the Kings - but where the queens and the children were buried) and to the impressive temple of Hatshepsut - the only female pharoah. Our guide made a point of calling her "Hot chicken soup" throughout the two days we had him, followed every time by a brief pause waiting for acknowledgement. It was funny the first time, but by the tenth...
We were taken to an alabaster shop (as a "break" from sightseeing) where they gave us a 5 minute demonstration before taking us into a one-room shop to wander for about half an hour! Needless to say, we didn't buy anything... although one of the workers there offered me 20 000 camels for Elle. The nerve! It would have taken 50 000 to get
me interested. To round off the tour, we went by the unimpressive Colossi of Memnon, two big statues which are well past their best! Being situated by the side of the road, right next to a bunch of shops doesn't help their cause either.
Well, with a bit of faith we went into a Luxor restaurant that had been recommended by a lovely English couple with us that morning. It was time to put my bowels to the ultimate test! What better way than chunks of meat sitting in a thoroughly oily sauce laden with onions? Well, it was delicious, and I'm glad to say, the old intestines were back in business. That afternoon we chilled out (literally) at the Mercure again (not our hotel, by the way) soaking up the aircon.
We had organised with Amigo tours to put us on the better train (with reclining seats) back to Cairo, and they did well. We got on about 7pm that night in Luxor, and we were back in Cairo by 4:30am - a little earlier than we liked! Anyway, some friendly Egyptians helped us get a taxi, and we were back at the Hotel Vienna by about 5am. You can imagine we were a little sleep deprived at that point! Anyway, we decided to battle the day out and not ask for a bed to snooze on. We headed out for breakkie, and I indulged in a fuul sandwich (beans cooked slowly with garlic, olive oil, lemon, salt and pepper - delicious!) while Elle went back to the bakery for the "best chocolate croissant ever!" We caught up on blogs (you may have noticed how swiftly Italy went up - impressed?) and saw Spiderman 3. I had a ball! It was only 10 Egyptian pounds (about $2.50 Australian), and the air-con was great! It had enough of a love story for Elle to enjoy it too - she even shed a few tears! What a softie... The intermission (which came abruptly halfway through the film!) music was fantastic - it was elevator music all muffled, and we felt very much like fish in a fish tank. The fish impressions abounded.
Well, we had our final Egyptian meal, and were hassled by a few more shop owners - two in a row, in fact, who after finding out we were Australian, claimed they were close friends of Molly Meldrum, who had personally blessed them as children. Enough said. We bumped into a fella staying at our hotel who was spending 11 years cycling around the world (in the name of peace, as his father was killed in war), who survives off meal donations and free accommodation. He has been robbed countless times and even kidnapped once! We didn't feel too much like seasoned travellers after talking to him. And then, Mr Saeed from the hotel drove us in his taxi back out the airport, and that was that!
A few comments -
1. We heartily recommend doing Egypt with a tour package. Of course, it will cost more than if you do it independently, whether you do it through your dodgy Cairo hotel owner or a more reputable company like Thomas Cook. But to save heartache, what a choice!
2. That said, I would consider doing Egypt independently if I was only doing Egypt, and not a RTW trip.
3. If a tout asks you where you are from, try a country with fewer travelling types, like Vatican City. Elle tells me lying is bad!
4. I feel like much of this blog has centred around my bowels. But surely that's more interesting than all this Pharaoh stuff. Don't you agree?
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kitty
non-member comment
very funny mister lee
Hey guys that was great!! glad to hear your bowels are in working order now!! at least you weren't vomiting as well which i was in egypt!! although no airconditioning on the bus would have killed me!! so glad you loved abu simbel!! see you soon!! xx Kit