Dreams of My University Students

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This week I gave oral exams to all my students. The topic: Dreams. They needed to tell me about a dream (the kind had while sleeping, a daydream, or a dream about their future) and tell me why it's important to them. They also needed to tell me the dream like they're telling a story. Like my middle school students, when they were young, they dreamed big. They wanted to travel everywhere, be doctors and save lives, play school and be teachers, or become brilliant scientists. Now, as young adults, many of them have squashed those dreams, thinking they aren't realistic. While there is some truth to that (a property management major is unlikely to become a doctor), I, personally, find it sad that they don't think they can chase their dreams. Many now have new dreams, most of which include being a successful businessman or businesswoman, being a mom, being good at whatever they are studying.

I find myself realizing how lucky I am. When I was little, dreamed impossible dreams, like being Wonder Woman, but I also dreamed of being a teacher. Now, yes, I did abandon this dream for a number of years, but I came back to it and was able to find another way to make it happen. I didn’t get a degree in education because, I didn’t have the 3.8 GPA needed to get into the school of education at my university. I was more interested in learning about the world around me than studying; that hasn’t changed. And, at the time, I also didn’t really like children, which seemed like an important pre-requisite. But later I was able to get into teaching ESL through volunteer work. For those of you who know me and my parents well, yes, I did get the idea from my mother, who also used to volunteer at the local library, teaching a man to read every week. It’s strange to think that something that started merely as a way to add some fulfillment to my life (banking didn’t cut it) would turn into all of this. I’m grateful that I had the option to change my life. I think a lot of my students don’t feel that way.

When asked, most of them think pursuing the new dream of their chosen career path is the most difficult or most important dream; part of me thinks it's because it's the only one they've ever really pursued, part of me thinks that they're facing family pressure now, and part of me isn’t sure. But it makes sense. When I was young, I wanted to be Wonder Woman or a ballerina, but clearly those were never going to come true. Also, this dream is most important because so much is relying on the outcome. They not only need to provide for themselves, but many also plan to help their parents when they’re older. They want to buy homes in an expensive, probably bubbled, housing market. They want a family, and many want two or more children. (Yes, if both parents are only children, they can do that. If the first child is a girl, families get a second chance to try for a boy.)

These are some of my favorite dreams:

"I don't want to be a painter, because they're only famous after they're dead. I don't want to be like Van Gogh."

"I want there to be Utopia, so everyone can live there, and not have to worry. Things won't be important."

'"I want to be a responsible boss. I want to take care of my employees, help them buy homes, cars, and so on. The rich make so much, and the poor have so little, this isn't right to me."

"I want to be an entrepreneur. I want to take calculated risks. I am not meant to be ordinary."

"I want to travel to France and Japan. In France, it is the center of the art world. You can touch art everywhere. Japan has good design. I would like to see it."

“I want to have a large farm with lots of flowers. I want tulips, lavender, and cherry blossoms. I will turn it into a park and everyone can come and see the beautiful flowers.

“I want to have a vineyard. Many people can work there together and it will be beautiful. I will also have a large garden near it.” Sadly, this student had no idea what wine was when I asked her about it.

Unlike last year, where I had lots of exciting stories to tell, this term I don’t. Those are the cream of the crop. Some were less than great. I had one student tell me his dream was to be young forever. It was clever. I laughed when he said he realized it could never happen. I asked questions and he answered well. The next day, another (top) student told me the EXACT same thing. Verbatim. And then didn’t do very well with my questions. Hmmmm. The third day, another student tried to tell me the same story, but forgot it all by the third line. I had a few other students whose “dreams” were a bit suspect, like the student who could tell me all about wanting to be an engineer, and how he could use the technology to help tanks and missiles be more accurate, and save lives, and create things, and a few other impressive statements… only to find out he is studying hotel management.

My dream to believe my students and take them at their word has come to an end. While part of me isn't surprised, I am still disappointed.

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Comments

[Elyse]

Dreams
No matter where we go in the world children's dreams are so big and then as we get older they seem to change along the way. Reality must set in somewhere along the way. Pete & I experienced the same thing with Oral Exams at our school how students would answer questions before we even asked them, say the exact thing as a prior student or not be able to say why or how. Business English students wanting to be Doctors after college. REALLY?

[Dad and Mom]

We really enjoyed this, but the dream of the young man in Shenzhen to become an astronaut is still our favorite.

[kevin]

the truth is
both your college and elyse's are third world colleges in China, so you just can't expect much from them. they just come in to get a degree and find a job, that's it.

[sunketing]

Chinese universities
First, China isn't a third world country, it's a developing country and considered second world. Some parts of China are advanced, and some are catching up, including changes in norms and values. There is no respect for copyright law. Second, it's a dog eat dog world here and any edge is an edge; students usually aren't taught how to do research papers or what plagerism is. Students everywhere, not just China, will cheat if they think they can get away with it.