Advertisement
Published: October 28th 2008
Edit Blog Post
Church of St Peters
BUILT IN 1710. WOW!! Sweats dripping down my face - I’m in Little India trying to find my hostel - Hindu music thumping in the background. The smells of India are substituted as I turned the corner towards my hostel by the river. That substituted smell is the fragrance of poop. With my nasal hair singed I had arrived in the Malaysian port city of Malacca.
Malacca was a wealthy trade centre with the city falling under first Portuguese than Dutch and English control over around 450 year period. It has a lot of influences from around the world. It’s people Christian, Hindu and Islamic. And its buildings from the colonial years have earned the city UNESCO World Heritage status only in July this year. It is evident that the city is going through a stage of transition. Money has been lashed out in an attempt to improve facilities and make this city more than just a day trip on a tourist calendar.
They have built a walkway along the river… but what’s the point of having a walkway when the river smells like shit? The smell is so bad that no one uses it. There’s a nice garden that surrounds the main
town square. That’s fine but it was at this point that I noticed people giggling. It didn’t seem to be a laughable place?
I had walked all afternoon from the 1710-built church to the church up on the hill, which looks out towards the city. I was lining up a photo and decided to sit down so some people could get out of my shot. I sat on the grass but jumped up. “Ouch!” It felt like a bindy. I start feeling my butt to release the bindy from my arse. But it was no bindy it was the effect of a lesser layer of clothing and grass hitting my underwear.
That’s Right! Mr Rio himself was showing for all to see courtesy of a massive split in my pants from poor stitching. And it was no ordinary split - From the start of the waist all the way down to the bottom. It started to all make sense. These people were laughing at me but had no time to tell me that I have my arse showing for the whole city to see. How long has this been happening? All day? In Singapore? Since the 1st Day?
As well as the stitching falling apart the button fell off 3 days earlier. Am I that much of a lard arse? Is my arse that big? I am becoming very self-conscious of my buttocks. I have sewed the pants up and have done a pretty good job. But how long will they last? I double knotted, threaded.
What a great meditation tool sewing is! Sitting there in the heat. Fan blowing the thin strands of grey and black material all over the place, forcing rethreads. “Why not buy a new pair of pants?” you might say. “You’re in Malaysia - pants cost $30. Drew you are such a tight arse! “
Well you see these are cargo pants and Malaysia don’t sell them anymore. They sell predominately jeans. These no pants that zip off to shorts. I have always said that as a fashion statement zip off pants are horrific. But… for a backpacker there is no better. They mean less weight, more room in the backpack. Plus my stitching is pretty good. A few girls in the hostel said they couldn’t do any better. I can hold out.
Even if it is a good job.
Cycle Rickshaws
Little India is close by. I can’t help but think that one day it will break. This means that every stretched movement I feel my buttock area with a questionable look on my face. Just to make sure everything is still in place. Even my sitting down has changed. I sit lady like to start off with before I can relax.
And that really is Malacca. Like my split cargo pants. Looking great in the shopfront (Like the colonialists in history) It’s practical (such as Malacca’s useful trading post during Monsoon season.) but in the end it stinks. Currently it has made a dodgy effort sewing up its faults. It may keep it going for now but people will see through the façade and it will end up in the scrapheap just like my pants. Unless of course they get the sewing machine out and fix it up properly.
Advertisement
Tot: 0.055s; Tpl: 0.013s; cc: 9; qc: 23; dbt: 0.0304s; 1; m:domysql w:travelblog (10.17.0.13); sld: 1;
; mem: 1.1mb
Kara
non-member comment
Hahahahahahaha!
How is this entry not commented on? I almost spit my coffee out when your pants split! Thanks for making me laugh and feel good. Can't wait to see what else happens!