The Handy Andes - Part I

South America » Ecuador » Centre » Baños
February 18th 2008

Published: February 21st 2008

Hi there. Sorry its been a while coming. Been having a good time in Ecuador so far and am in a little town called Banos off the avenida de Volcanoes. Nice! Hopefully tonight we are heading up to see Tuaruahanga mildly erupt. I think I spelt that wrong, it´s almost Maori...anyway! I will begin at the beginning and hopefully can sort the photos out too, other wisae you may have to wait for them, but the plan is to do one evry 10 days or two weeks.

Thurs 7th Feb - have way too much crapo I decide as we nip out of the airport in Houston, don´t mess with Texas to stand under this hot yellow thing in the sky we have not seen in ages. Oh it feels good on the face, the warmth of it. Then we jumped back on a plane and landed in Quito a few hours later at 11.00 local time (weirdly its on the same timeline as Boston, even though you assume its further West it´s not.) Jump in a cab and the altitude is playing tricks already. Jose lets us into Chicago Hostal (between new and olds cities) and saves the tour thankfully. After four flights of stairs, we are buggered and dizzy in the thin air at 2850 metres above sea level, the virgin angel to the south on the hill guarding us as the clock tower from the opposite lit up church chimed like a rubber and metal dildo clanging against a copperpot, and we sleep fitfully.

fri 8th Feb - Slept in! My legs were killing me like I had ruin to the corner shop and breathing was a bit difficult. Glad we chose to leave on the 7.15am Saturday bus to Manta, heading for the coast. Spent the day walking around, checking out the diverse population, the tourists, the nearly whites, the spaniush, the Indians, the blacks and everything in between. Fascinating! eating awesome churrasco (avocado, salad, beef patty with egg on over frites. $1.25 - get in! Chilled with a couple of beers and a bird from Brixton and Miwembley on the terrace as the sun went down - it gets dark and light very quickly here.

Sat 9th Feb - We arrived in Manta at about 5.15 on a bus with no toilet - ouch! Problem was we didn´t consult the map. We should have got off an hour earlier in Portoviejo and changed for Canoa and were thus forced to set up camp in this dive of a port town. Our room hadd CNN and a double bed with a wonky fan but for 20 bones I was hoping the window would look onto more than a few air ducts! Had a nice Chinese meal and a bottle of beer on the street and had an early night.

Sun 10th Feb - Checked out, bought snacks and got the hell out of Manta, heading to Canoa. It took an hour to Portoviejo and then about 3ish to Canoa, a nice little beach resort we arriverd in around 5pm. Lucked out with hostel called Coco Loco, owned by an Alaskan Elizabeth and a Mexican Mauricio (who had a little 4 year old mini-mao and is from Saywhatenayo, where they end up in Shawshank Redemptioin, although he informs me that was actually shot in Birginia!) for the last 3 months after buying from Dutch Franz who chewed our ears off at the bar during 2-4-1 cocktail hour (which anyone can call!) This was after we had been in the sea of course and within minutes poor old Laura had grazed herself in the powerful shore surf and nearly feinted as we slowly crawled (almost literally) back to the room, trying in vain to draw attentuion to ourselves.

There were three American birds Ashley from Chicago, a 23 year old Jennifer Garner goofy look-a-like with a funny laugh, glasses and nice tits. She turned out to be rather intense (or was that the Xanax herself and friends took to seduce the Swiss nobheads (moody and neutral!) they were travelling with?) and her surfer friend Jen from Boston was nailing the cocktails. Laura Ann was by far the most down to earth, A southern Georgia belle with a lovely soft accent, who they just happened to bump into along the way and drag with. We drank with them and our neighbours (our room Chile, theirs Argentina!), Organic Maine Farmers lost voice Mobster Patricia and mega-patient one-eyed Michael. more to come on them. Let´s just say it was better when she had lost her voice and that he was a saint, a gentleman with an interest in Ecuador and many things.

Let´s just say we were happy to be at the beach and once cleaned up the wounded Laura, we nailed the strawberry daquiris and $1 beers from the barmaid Emily, a mid-twenties Buffalo girl with massive hammers (out for tips, one of the old local drunks observed) who had been in Ecuador 3 years and was super-friendly - she reminded me amazingly of my friends Rachel Reynolds and Rebecca. Mark, from Leeds was not back until wednesday night with successful news of his Ecuadorean girl´s successful UK visa application. and so I booked a surf lesson for Thursday morning and went to bed quite drunk around midnight.

Mon 11th Feb - still no sign of my Glastonbury ticket acceptance email bolx thing, must have deleted from my spam by accident! Wankers. Will probably not bother now, a massive effort for a dwindling festival?

We sat around most of the day swinging in Hammocks and reading Into The Wild, a true account of Chris McCandless who walks into the wild of Alaska after two years on the road after burning his ID and money and succumbs to the wilderness in the end. Harrowiung and interesting, recently made into a film by Sean Penn I am dying to see. We learnt today that Franz still has his name on the contract for the hostel and he won´t recede it because it will affect his visa. Also Elisabewth is an entrepreneur and wants to maximise the merchandise possibilities but can't until this happens, so they have to go to Quito and get a lawyer to help. Funnily enough Laura, the Alaskan friend of the owner, a former drug addict and awesome loud funny 38 year old from Homer also, made us all laugh when the taxman arrived. It turned out Franz hadn´t paid his taxes for like two years and she screamed in delight - ´What an idiot!¨ and started laughing, in the only way a loud 20-a-day American can, which woke the hostel up and got the day off to a flyer. The surf looked pretty good, but my guts were in Beirut. On the trip down I had been sat in the window and burnt my arm and because of the lack of toilets not drunk enough water (damn my small bladder!), so when the 241 icy cocktails went flying down it must have caused a chain reaction as I was in dire straits for a few days, although not nearly as bad as the one an hour India experience. For the first time we ate dinner somewhere other than Coco Loco and it was nice fish, but the rice tasted like it had been boiled in dirty water and the beer was flat like gnat´s piss, so we foolishly went back to the hostel and someone called Happy hour. My guts were not up for it but I nailed about 10 Cuba Libres, whilst chatting to these three mid fifties Canadians who had just arrived. Neil from Nelson, BC, reminded me very much Tom Payne - extremely laid back and quietly wise, an awesome skiier and master carpenter, his Nelson buddy Brian (a 55 year old recent retiree with a tache, bald head and a coma-inducing knowledgeavble talk) told me. He also volunteered as an avalanche technician, blowing up bits of the mountain, forcing landslides foir the safety of the poblic. He was telling me about Bears and how if you skjin one down they are very similar to humans, how he got stuck between a grizzly bear and her two cubs (like the worst scenario), and how his mates stir their drinks with Grizzly bear dick bones! Funny.

Brian talked more about history, religion, and politics (but in a good healthy way) effecting the state of today´s world etc, and it was clear he was the least travelled of the three, but he was so calm when he spoke that you almost drifted out of your body into what he was talking about.

Daryl, 51, who had a number of 3 year relationships under his belt, a Walter Mathieu look-a-like and self-confessed hopelñess romantic, who had lived in Switzerland and Germany, his father (an Canadian RAF pilot) moving him 12 school in 17 years, must have given him itchy feet. He was travelling light as him and mate Andy (in Quito) had their bags stolen and only had day packs, but he said at the end of his trip it was liberating and I can only guess what he means as I feel I have far too much stuff. Daryl lives 100km from the others across a mountain range, so really it is 400km, and he gets a free 45 minute ferry across a lake at the bottom of the mountain pass. The way he speaks of the land and the ranching, a completely different drier climate, makes me want to head there beofre i go home in MAy, but then I have always wanted to explore Canada and little money and two weeks will not be enough I feel. He speaks also of the cow-´boys´little native Indian girls no more than 13 who have to bring in the herd down the mountain by 15 Ocotber lest they freeze or get stuck. Well away we chatted about all sorts of things until I crawled bent double into bed and slept terribly in our pushed together bamboo singles.

Tues 12th Feb - Had to immodium it up on the road today as Emily (also a Spanish teacher), Laura Alaska, Laura and I cycled our mountain bikes up to Caba Pasado (a cave on the beach, where her boyfriend was excavating) except we never made it. At the 5 mile turn off for Rio Muchacho, we took a gravek path down to a small stream and locked them together. I had only brought 1 bottle of water and 1 gatorade, not really enough as I avoided breafast too. Crossed the bamboo bridge and trekked for a few miles through the bush, and cow fields until it became apparent we had missed a turning and the sun became very hot over head. Because Laura Alaska (3 weeks off the methadone) was almost diabetic, we had to return slowly and when she had a banana and some biscuits, the nausea passed. We were quiet unfit but it was a good four hours until we arrived home again, and nice to get off the beaten track despite not getting to our final destination. Laura took a snooze when we got home, and I jumped into the ocean to cool down. I had worn a vest and caught the sun and again, not drunk enough water so le brad pitts continued so I deceided it ws wise to have an alcohol-free evening, which ended in me (after watching A Fish Calle dWanda on DVD) locking the TV room door as instructed, but locking inside another Laura´s (Dutch spacve cadet) wallet and passport inside. What the fuck it was doing in the kitchen and TV room when she was not is beyond me, but she had to go wake up Mau to get it as she said she was leaving at 7am the next day.

Wed 13th Feb - she lied! She was still there at 8ish when we awoke. I was feeling very lethargic and had to imodium it up aghain. Sleeping with ear plugs in is working, but it might be affecting my balance or something exterior as I am more tired than when I sleep less! Anyway, today Me, laura, Pat and Mike caught an open backed lorry ride to Finka Rio Muchacho (an completely self-sufficient no waste organic farm - only one of two in Ecuador). The road became too muddy as it rains every night, and so Dario the owner had to come pick us up in his chain-tyred methane running Land Rover. We traversed a couple of rivers too before we arrived first ly at the school. This cost $8000 a year (for 3 teachers of 35-40 students) and it taught them all from an early age about organic farming, climate, what to grow when, not to slash and burn which decresaes fertility and is still widespread as the future is in their little hands so to spoeak.

Dario (Barcelona born, Ecaudor raised) gave us an extensive tour of the farm, the pig and chicken shit used for the worms to turn into compost and humis etc, and trapping the methane etc too. He had everything you can imagine growing from sesame to papaya and trades the things the climate wont allow (cauliflower and potatoes foe eg) at that time of year. There is a small amount of trade and merchandise from the tours which goies to pay the school fees and staff (there are also lots of volunteers, mainly american guiirls), but really its totally not about money, its about community subsistence. Also the farm runs of water energy. After an incredible fresh veggie lunch. Even the bowls and spoons were made from dried fruit and veg (like coconut shells), we had two activities. the first was an hour on horseback wandering through the area with guide, local don Deansong, who looks after all the community living on his land like Don John of Mark used to. Then we made chocolate, you never seen the girls so excited. All during this I might add Pat was moaning like an Italain mother in a Scorcese film and doing both Laura and I´s Swedes in!
You got the cocao fruit and pulled the beans, sucked the sweet white goo from them and piled them up. (You should see the number of photos Laura did) Then you cooked them in a pan until the skin cracked, removed the shells, and then placed in a grinder with 50% sugar cane. Grind and add to warming milk on stove and stir til chocloatey. Then serve over bananas. Yum! They even gave us a bag of ground cocoa to take hjome, but I think most of its all over L´s bag now! Got a lift home in a combo of Land Rover and an A-Team van with Dario´s wife kiwi Nicola and watched the sunset over the hills, arriving after dark in the rain. Ate some mushroom tortillas and a tuna melt and after arranging a surf lesson with Leeds Mark over a few beers, called it an early one.

Thurs 14th Feb - spent most of Valentine´s dfay recovering from my surf, the rip was quite strong and after standing up barely a few times after no brekkie and walking five minutes (how striong current was) back up the beach every part of me ached. Then finished my book in a swing chair hammock on our balcony and replaced my fluids. Walked up the beach and booked Chicago hostek for two more nights in Quito for Fri and Sat, as we decide time was running low to get south, although we could have stayed for a month. Had a daquiri on the beachfront and then came back for dinner at Flores, a lovely restaurant just around the corner. Michael, a nice, saintly patient man, annoyed me for the first time when he asked if Laura and I were a couplke - hello, duh? and Pat who tagged along to our dinner just is the worst interrupting non listener ever and I was glad to throw in an anti-Italian joke to get her going by the end of the night. She thought La Tomatina (Spanish tomato fight festival) was Italian and I said there´s no way the Italians would do that, ruin their hair, they´re too vain etc. Well that shut her up and was a consolation goal from the under dog.

Fri 15th Feb - Caught a 2 hour bus north to Pedernales a small fishing town, with Daryl who has managed to blag his way onto a mate´s Galkapogaos trip as "crew". nice! Bought some snacks and then caught the 7 hour bus to Quito. I was glad to jump out and use the bathroom about 2 hours south, as the sun set on another overcast day. We jumped in a cab waving good luck to Walter Mathieu and were back in the hostel we had left on Saturday and in bed by 9pm, knackered by the altitude and travel onmce more.

Sat 16th Feb - After breakfast we headed back to the bus station and jumped on a 2 hour bus to Otavalo north, the biggets market town in South America. Wll Laura was in heaven and for once we packed light, what happened we got drenched is what, so after a Churrasco lunch, we braved the elements. Got some great photos of the landscvape but mainly the diverse friendly people. I got an Ecuador shirt and a woven beanie for $7, and Laura got some jewellry and a bag amd we were back on the bus with a Jet Li film and home by 7pm, checking the football scores - Liverpool 1-2 Barnsley (jaysis!)

Sun 17th Feb - Left after breakfast to Banos 4 hours south, where we will spend 4 nights. Arrived around 3ish and headed to La Chiminea hostel which daryl reccommended, very nice, just below the Virgen waterfall with a terrace view of the whole town. Weren´t sure we would make it as the roads had been closewd when Tungurahua volcano erupted the other day. Saw it on the news, it was awesome! Went to the hot springs which was very relaxing despite the hundreds of people everywhere (Sunday!) and then had an early dinner before the old guts exploded once more. Damn it, i thought these waters were meant to be healing.

Mon 18th Feb - After a lazy lie in, we went quad biking for four hours through the mountains and pouring rain. Great craic, taking in the avenue of waterfalls and a bit of trekking down to one that had me and Laura gasping. How will we fair on the colca canyon and inca trail - jaysis! Then on route I did a swing jump off a bridge which Laura recorded on her camera and I will try to put on facebook or something. Great fun today but was wiped when we got back and after going through editing my pictures and reading 50 pages of Cormac McCarthy´s The Road, went to La Casa Hood, an American owned restauarant with a n amazing vibe. Although i got the worst stomach cramp and shit ditreectly after, barely making it home, it was so nice I think we are heading there for breakfast today (Tues). When we returned home the manger was trying to tell us that at 4am ze Germans would be getting up, hving breakfast and leaving on a trek, and that it would be noisy. I mistook it for a group of Germans would be coming so we could no longer stay for 4 nughts or would have to move, Laura hilñariously thought that the was going to be an earthquake and if we wanted to go at 4m to check out the mountain. I was almost eager not wnting to miss out. It turned out the Germans made a mini-erthquake of their own anyway at 4am so it wasn{t that funny after all.

Tues 19th Feb: had breakfast til midday and climbed the virgen steps of the volcano to get an amazing view of the city and wtch Liverpool 2-0 Inter Milan in a bar with a mad scotsman called Paul who had been travelling for 15 years , was nice enough, but a bit creepy. Played a few rounds of pool and then called home and spoke to mi madre and went to Bella Italia for a nice pasta dinner and was home in bed by 9pm knackered, my calves killing from the walk, even though the altitude here is only 1500m. Banos seems to be a seaside town stuck in the mountains and I like it very much.

Wed 20th - Awoke reletively early and had a steam bath in the hostel. Carlos oversawthe whole thing and it was lovely, in and out with cold water treatments and back in with cypress and eucalyptus steam, lasting 45 minutes. Then we showered and went to breakfast at Casa Hood, where I had a breakfast burrito that was awesome and a herbal tea good for digestion. Then Laura did some stuff on the internet and we walked 30 minutes around the mountain to the zoo, where I got some awesome photos of jaguar, puma, toucan, squirrel monkeys, spectacled bears, Galapogos turtles, and lots of birds, including a condor with a 4 metre wing span. Got back and watched the Lyon 1-1 Man Utd game in the same bar, where Paul was and booked myself a dental appointment for Thursday morning, as one of my teeth is being quite sensitive. Then i called my sister to see how her wedding preparations are going and then we headed to a Swiss Bistro for dinner and had a farmers salad, potato rosti and meat fondue. Amazingly good! At 9pm we caught a chiva (something unfortunately, as it was clearer, we were too tired to do last night) , which is an open sided bus you can also sit on the roof of and it takes you up to Ronton pass for a view of the city and hopefully Tunguahrua volcano glowing and smoking in the night sky. It actually properly erupted last week and it was funny seeing it on the news, interviewing all the excited toursits. They gave us some moonshine and sandg some hippy songs around a camp fire and then we went down. Had I spoken better Spanish I no doubt woiuld have enjoyed the spiel given by the guide abouyt Banos and the volcano. Also the fact we couldn´t see it meant the $4 seemed like a bit of a ride for a return bus journey and a shot of moonshine, but hey maybe I am just cynical. If you had seen it smoking and glowing away you probably would have paid more, just luck I guess.

Thursday 21st - okay going to log off as I have to go to the dentist now and then we check out and catch a bus to Riobamba, where we plan to get the Devil. having trouble with the photos, but promise to send them as soon as I can! Maybe on facebook if not here, goddamn computers!

The Handy Andes - Part I

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