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Published: March 16th 2006
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Gamble Number One
Despite a poor weather forecast, Emma, Matt (a friend from Brant Lake - I say friend, really I should be less liberal with the use of that term, let's just say this dude I know, well actually dude is probably overstating his case and to say I know this guy - I had never actually conversed with him until he arrived at the airport the other day - so there was already a large element of risk in this trip) and I took off to QT. Already living on the edge, by choosing a 3 hour car journey with two (practically) strangers I could barely contain myself. I entertained the passengers with stories of my youth which made the time fly by. What felt like 18 hours later, we arrived just short of QT in a place called Arrowtown, site of the great river crossing scene in the LoTR trilogy. My passengers could barely contain themselves with excitement. Digital video effects are amazing. Well, certainly a lot more amazing than the stream that we stumbled across. To think those horses nearly drowned here.
We found the discovery lodge hostel and negotiated a deal. I demanded that we
Another Lord of RIngs Scene
Apparently this is where they filmed the horses crossing the river - Digital Effects are amazing eh wouldn't stay unless my friend could stay for free. The lovely man behind the counter obliged. I think he recognised me, either that or Matt 's job at Discovery Lodge in Auckland did the trick.
We began by undertaking the 30-minute hike (as Matt insisted the guidebook had told him) up the gondola trail in order to get a free ride down. The view was pretty spectacular at the top and despite the 50 minute schlepp (I think schlepp is the correct term) was well worth it - especially as it gave me another chance to pick a fight with Matt. The pecking order was settled.
We spent the remainder of the afternoon spending as much money as possible, booking up hang-gliding, river surfing, canyoning and bungee jumping. All horribly overpriced but if you're gonna do any of them, I couldn't think of a better place to give them a go.
HANGLIDING
Em was booked in first for hangliding as there wasn't room for all of us to go together. Unfortunately 3 out 5 days present conditions that aren't good enough for hangliding, either too much or too little wind. Today had too little wind, but also
Intensive Flying Training
"Hold on to me and run really really quickly" gusts that presented danger, danger!!. So after hours (minutes) of pep-talks, and intensive training from (some kind of 3-legged race) with our "expert" and co-pilot Em didn't get to fly. If the "expert" had only remembered the glider, then they might have had a chance.
We finished the afternoon with a walk around Lake Wakatipu as I entertained Emma and Matt with stories of my youth. In the evening, Matt and I bid farewell to Emma (she had to catch bus back to work at Otago Uni on Monday) ventured downtown to the casino.
You've Got To Know When To Hold em - Know When To Fold em...
Matt had this "foolproof" method for winning on the roulette table. "Ah that old monkey I thought". I had my own plan, which was high-odds low stakes, ie guess the number on the nose, which I managed to do at least 3 times, while Matt was slowly increasing his pot through odd/even and red/black betting. About an hour later we were both still there with over $180 on the table in front of us (significantly more than when we started).
It was round about this point when things took
a turn. The foolproof method became foolhardy and I was having less hits than www.extremestampcollecting.com. As our money detiorated rapidly we turned to Matts tarot card which had a list of all the previous winning numbers on it. The last 7 bets had all been even black numbers. We both threw in about 1/3 of our pot - Matt went for odds & went for red. Black 10. You're having a laff. Right, I looked at Matt and he gave me a knowing nod. "We're all in". Again he opted for odd & I opted for red, we watched the wheel spin and the ball bounce, listened intently to the "ting" of the no more bets bell.... Black 22. Unbeliveable 9 straight even blacks. This show was over. Well, until the next wheel spin that we watched without a chip to our name... Red 9. How we chuckled to ourselves at our hapless luck. Pah!
"Let's go get p*ssed" - I dunno if we actually said it, or we just knew it. Either way it happened with little effort.
RIVER SURFING
River surfing was like rafting but you were actually in the river with a boogey board for
The Remarkables
Up the Gondola walk in QT flotation. First and foremost I had an issue with spending a day on a boogey board. To any self-respecting surfer (I first had to think to myself if I actually had any self-respect for myself as a surfer and concluded that I guess I did - kind of like the respect we all had for Eddy the Eagle and Eric the Eel- they just didn’t give up eh) spending any amount of time on a bogey board (AKA teabag, or sponge) was like, well, I guess like dumping your girlfriend with a post-it note. It’s definitely an easy option, but nobody with any balls would actually do it. So, we took off to the Kawarau river, donned our wetties and prepared to follow the 6km passage on our "sponges". There were 3 sections of rapids a couple of grade 3’s and a long section that was 2-4, so on a 5-point scale (for commercial rapids at least) it sounded decent.
I’d rather have spent the day shopping for house-plants. Ok, that’s a bit of an exaggeration, because you wouldn’t get to see the Lord of the Rings Canyon Towers at B&Q or MFI (look I don't know where you
buy house-plants from - Dagfields?). So that was that.
CANYONING
The next day Matt and I, accompanied by our guides John and Charlie and another English girl, took off to the "12-Mile Delta River" for a canyoning extravaganza. After minutes (seconds) of safety briefing we took off into the woods to the river. Matt looked nervous, so I held his hand. He looked more nervous, so I let go. The first event was a zipline across the gorge. Naturally I went first and was the best. Matt cacked his little panties but made it across unscathed, while the English girl (i'm sure she had a name - let's call her Lara Croft) looked veritably bored. Phase 2 was an abseil about 50ft, then a swim through some rock pools and down some waterfalls - all pretty good fun.
Then John (are extreme guide) gave us the chance to jump off a 20ft ledge into a pool. We all obliged quite casually. Next time through he suggested we try a flip. Again, without much hesitation we all completed the task admirably. John, at this point began to tell us how he'd been working on a 1 1/2 forward flip.
"Wooooaaaah", we thought to ourselves. "Bet you can't do it, bet you can't do it". John would not let us down. He leapt from the ledge completed a perfect 1st rotation, before opening up a tad too sooon, and finishing horizontal with a full-on face plant. Nice!! That was extreme!! He surfaced red faced, though I'm still unsure whether that was from embarrasment or from the slap in the face. Regardless, he was a legend.
We continued with similar exploits for another hour or so before finishing by a rock pool. This time it was Charlie who suggested "here's a nice little rock to try a back flip - watch me, then you can have a go yourselves". Charlied perched himself on the edge of the rock, turned around and flipped himself into the rock pool. He came up with a knowing smile on his face "how'd i do" - "well aside from narrowly avoiding fatal concussion by millimetres you looked 'sweet as' mate. Yeah, that rock you jumped from your face nearly landed on".
"Oh really", he replied "perhaps you should try the front flip then eh?"
"So do you get much training for this sort of
Sweet as man, sweet as
Up the Gondola walk in QT work mate?" Matt inquired. "Nah, not really, you just pick it up," replied John. "Right o" we thought, as we unzipped our suits and headed back to the van.
Happy Days.
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All good stuff. Keep 'em coming - but not too many *'s Mary took her little lamb a hang gliding one day. She surely was a silly girl her little *