Published: July 11th 2008July 11th 2008
Remember him Europe? Well, he remembers you, and he wants to get back together.
So, I made it safely back home after 19 days amongst my European brothers. After powering through a father unpleasant final 48 hours I have hopefully slept through my jet lag, but time shall tell. Here is what is going to happen. Over the next few days I am going to add my on the road writings to this and attempt to keep them just as they are. Bear in mind you will be getting some odd riffings from napkins, loose pieces of paper, and late night ramblings, but that makes it really fun. Please, forgive the language at the onset.
But now, first thing is first. After spending three weeks in Europe I have discovered a relationship I need to mend. That's right, for my first act after returning to the US, I am going to step in and mend a bridge.
Europe, I would like to reintroduce you to an old friend. His name is treble. I know you people "invented" music and all that, but it seems like at some point you forgot this old buddy. Since you have obviously forgotten, treble is the part of sound that ISN'T FUCKING BASS!!!! THAT'S RIGHT EUROPE THERE IS SOMETHING YOU CAN MIX INTO MUSIC THAT ISN'T FUCKING BASS!!!!!!!!!!!!! I spent 19 days in restaurants, clubs, bars, GAS STATIONS, and everywhere (and I do FUCKING MEAN EVERYWHERE) I was greeted with the lovely, dynamic sound of BASS. Quick piece of advice EUROPE, think of all the times you went to a rock show and sat on the edge of your seat waiting for THE BASS SOLO. Or how many times you went to a concert hoping that the guitarist doesn't show and you are treated to 2 hours of glorious, skilled bass playing.
Oh, those things NEVER FUCKING HAPPENED!! Really? What a surprise!
Look, I got no problem with bass. I enjoy it, really I do. It's a vital part of the music I love. But for the love of Baby Jesus! I like salt, but it exists to provide flavor and texture. At no point in my life have I ever looked forward to making a meal of just salt. Learn to enjoy all the meats of our cultural stew. Really, it's ok. Now work on that and not charging people to use the bathroom (more on that one later) and I think I can learn to love you again.
SO, I just wanted to get that one general thing out there before I started the grand transcription. You will be hearing more soon.