India

---

Five Reasons I'm Most Excited to Visit India
By M.R.A.M.

1. It's our first stop and therefore the only one I've given much thought. When you're traveling for six months, you either need to quit your job well in advance to research and prepare, or you need to wing it. Initially, I attempted to research a few of the countries we'll visit throughout our trip, but I wound up stuck in the safety section of the travel message boards, reciting phrases like, "In order to increase your chance of survival in a bus accident, sit in an aisle seat toward the back of the bus," over and over again, attempting to engrain the valuable information into my notoriously short-term memory. Eventually, I gave up and decided to focus on the first stop, using my 1999 Lonely Planet India as a guide. The book was less than $1 at a stoop sale. I'll confess that bargain is a big reason I have high hopes for India. The first of many great deals.

2. (On that same train of thought,) I have left the planning largely in the hands of Steph. I'm lazy. She spent two months there last summer and is very passionate about the place. She is doing her best to provide me with guidance, using my outdated travel book with a stranger's writing in it as a base, GOD BLESS HER LITTLE BALLERINA HEART. The notes she's added in my ancient book are mostly along the lines of "Feed the monkeys!" and "Get a $5 massage!" which is just the sort of guidance I crave.

3. Everything I've heard from others who have visited. Here's what EVERY SINGLE PERSON who has visited India says: "India is SO dirty. Smelly with a capital S. Poop and trash all over the way-too-crowded streets. The living conditions are sad; the caste system is horrible. I got extremely sick while I was there and wasted two days on the bathroom floor and another three in bed, recovering. Have I mentioned it's smelly? Oh, I have. It's also hot. You'll be uncomfortable the whole time because you'll have to wear long pants and long-sleeved shirts. Everyone will stare at you. Traveling takes way too long. You'll be overcharged for everything you purchase. But, oh, I am SO jealous of you! I'd go back in a second."

WTF?

4. The food. Have I mentioned I'm a pig? Have I mentioned I'm a vegetarian, and they cater to my people? Mmm... naan.

5. The preparation for battle. As the aforementioned, seasoned India travelers have noted, if we survive India, we can survive anything. Everything will be a cakewalk in comparison. Throw me to the wolves. I'm ready.

---