Robo-Midge

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Well, one night and the better part of the next day later, we finally rolled from the train station in Newton, KS. Since we were leaving around 5:00 we knew we’d be traveling in the dark for much of the 14 hour ride, so when it started to storm nearly immediately after we boarded we knew there was only one thing to do - get a drink. We stowed our stuff, and made our way back to the lounge and viewing car.

Even though we were going through South-Central Kansas the views were, at times, interesting. We saw a few small towns resulting in a lengthy lament of the decline of small-town America - literarture and John Mellencamp came up - we saw some rolling prairie lands, and at one point I saw a cattle processing facility that probably had 5,000 cows (really). Of course we also saw grass, a huge junkyard, and darkness.

Then it got dark and things got interesting. Some things are best termed unfortunate. Our attempts to sleep on this particular train would fall into that unfortunate category. Would a person be able to sleep in the seats on this train under ideal circumstances? Absolutely. There is a good bit of leg room, though not quite enough for me to extend my legs completely. The seats recline significantly more than seats on any airline I’ve been on (though I’ve never flown first-class).

I’d even venture to say that our experience on this train was unique even when compared to other passengers on this train, because our major problems with sleeping had nothing to do with the train itself. We were surrounded by the only people who didn’t seem to realize that it was midnight, 1, 2, 3, 4 in the morning. Seriously - talking and laughing all night. I don’t know what was so funny, but just when the smoking (not on the train, but every time it stopped they’d get off and have one) couple behind us who had the nastiest coughs we’ve ever heard finally fell asleep a brother and sister got on in La Junta, CO.

Now he didn’t look much like Carlos Mencia (more like Carlos than Dane Cook if you get my drift), but his sister would definitely buy his stand-up comedy CD because she laughed constantly (with him joining in on occasion for a nice harmony of laughter). Luckily the extremely large woman across from us snored loud enough to drown out much of the laughter (she smoked as well).

Oh, I almost forgot. At the same time the brother and sister in front of us were getting on, a woman who I will fail miserably at describing well enough to do her justice got on. Here goes - she was a Mexican midget with an extra-long mullet. Her face was oddly formed so she looked like the obnoxious neighbor on Family guy (the one who thinks he’s a ladies man, but has a giant jaw). Top that off with the fact that she sounded like a high-pitched surveillance drone from Star Wars when she spoke. When we first heard her speak (this was before we saw her) Sarah turned to me and asked, “what was that?” to which I replied “I don’t know.” We both really didn’t realize that this alien sound was actually a person speaking.

I woke up for the last time around 4:00. I figured the sun would start to brighten the landscape enough to allow me to get some looks at the mountains of Northern New Mexico. This did eventually happen. Around 4:30, I began to see the silhouettes of the desert mountains. You don’t often get to watch the effects of a sunrise on such a canvas, and this was a sight to see. The colors on the mountainside seemed to change as the sun rose over the horizon behind us.

Once the sun was all the way up, we were rolling through some flat lands, but nearby we could see desert mesas rising up. They weren’t exactly what I expected (of course if things were the trip would be pretty boring) - the sides weren’t as straight as I imagined. I’m really not entirely sure they were mesas, actually. The sides rose up from the plain at about a 45 degree angle, and they were flat on top.

Finally, at about 6:30 Wednesday morning, we arrived in Albuquerque and got off the train. It was time to find the hotel and convince them to let us check in early. First we had to arrange transportation. Our original plan was to take a bus from the depot next to the train station. We wandered a bit trying to find the place and finally did. Once there it was a bit of a problem finding the spot where our bus would be coming, figuring out how we would pay to use the bus (I bought some suspect tokens from a woman who claimed they would work), and figuring out how long we’d have to wait. Eventually a driver pulled up and told us it would be about an hour before our bus arrived.

1-411 - Albuquerque, NM - taxi. About five minutes later a cab pulled up, the driver picked up our bags, put them in the back of the minivan and we got in. Along the way he was both driver and tour guide, pointing out good places to eat along the route, bars, and Old Town. He even gave us a little history lesson about the Victorian era oldest part of Albuquerque and Old Town, which was home to the native settlement near the Rio Grande. Definitely worth the $12 we paid him.

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