Baseball season heats up

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Spring is around the corner! And guess what that means…spring training!

After an amazing summer, I crashed and burned down the summer homestretch to find myself out of playoff contention. However, though I did ultimately collapse on the surface, dig deeper and you realize I got a loaded farm system with crazy prospects.

So this is the championship year, fellows. Last summer of university, and I gots to make it count.

To get you up to speed from when I came back from Japan:

After easily the best summer of my life, I was looking at another cold (literally and figuratively) winter in Montreal. I’ve had no success in the winter leagues. I might be the fucking shit in Japan, but in Montreal I’m just a skinny ass Asian with a New Yawk accent.

However, first day in Montreal, a prospect literally landed on my lap.

Winter League

I was at OAP (open air pub, basically just some chairs and tables strewn on campus, with beer) and since I was in Montreal early, no one I wanted to hang with was around. I then spot some people I knew from math class…and a few women. Remember, I still thought it was summer and my brain was still jet lagged so I still thought I was King Shit like in Japan.

Except this was Montreal.

I saunter up, introductions are made, beer is bought and comments about the upcoming school year are brought up. I am almost completely ignored. To them I’m random anonymous Asian. There are about 10 people in the group, all Math majors, and conversation flows around, over, under but not at me.

Then a lucky break.

Conversation stops briefly, and my friend asks, “So how was Japan?” All eyes turn to me.

Cha-ching, jackpot.

I tell a few of my crazy stories, all of them breathlessly watching me. I realize the similarities between Japanese people and this group—to them, I’m the crazy motherfucker they wish they were. After I’m finished, I’m the center. I'm the man.

Time to close in.

As detailed on this blog, I really don't have to explain this part. However, I was feeling so confident, I was really pushing it. I was so forward that I started throwing pebbles down her cleavage and other blatantly sexual things…

“You wanna come to my house?” she asked.

**Sidenote: I didn’t believe in Jesus until shit likes this happens

We did what 19 year olds do in each others houses, and then she became my girlfriend.

Spring Training Preview

We’ve broken up now (I won’t bore you with the details about our tumultuous relationship and subsequent separation). But because I was reveling in my starting pitcher in the majors…my depth chart was/is shit.

Until Teddy walks up to me in class one day. “Guess what? Shin, Chikai and Soon hae are coming to Calgary.” I’m literally in disbelief. I know me and Ted are good at this Nanpa shit (Nanpa means picking up random women in Japan)…but to have bitches fly to us? Shit. We quickly book tickets, then invite a few more prospects to come with us to really skew the ratios.

This is fucking golden.

I’ve never mentioned Chiaki on this blog, but here is the deal with her: she’s cute, funny and really qwerky. Me and Ted met the three above (Soon hae, Chiaki and Shin) at a fireworks festival, roped them in by playing baseball with little kids (to make us look good) and then went drinking with them. I quickly derail the only guy in the group, Shin, by using the vodka line that so many Japs fall for. Shin is shooting his vodka down like Jordan in the 90’s because he thinks he’ll be cockblocking. Not the case. Me and Ted quickly divvy up the women and we’re rocking as Shin tries to keep himself vertical. Sadly, Ted’s prospect, Soon Hae, has a driving lesson and has to go straight home (or so she says). I’m far from my home…and I’m thinking at staying at Teddy’s, when Chiaki offers her house…

**Sidenote: Jesus strikes again

Ted, seeing a sac fly will get me in, makes some excuse to go home. I’m gearing up for it in the train.

5 stops to her house. The four of us (Soon Hae and Shin live near Chiaki) are tiredly talking.
4 stops. She starts leaning against me.
3 stops. My hand is around her waist.
2 stops. My heart is racing now as she slowly looks up at me ("she's beautiful" is all I can think).
Her stop, we get off, holding hands…

…and so do the other two…

Fuck!

My mouth is hanging in a drunken stupor (**Sidenote: fuck jesus). Chiaki looks confusingly at the station in her drunken stupor.

C : “Um, is this your station?”
S^2:”No…we thought we would go with you to your house…”
C: “No, I’m fine. Everything's ok.”
S^2:”Oh…Well, will you look at that…that was the last train…so we have to stay over, since we can’t go home.”
C : “Um…ok”

Sometimes, you know you’ve lost. Like Tom Brady’s face as the Giants D-Line pummeled him, like Michelle Kwan collecting an array of silver and bronze medals, like Polish soldiers on their horses as they stared at Nazi tanks.

In those cases, all you can do is tip your cap to your adversary. And hang on to hope, begging (**Here’s where Jesus makes a reappearance) for an opening.

They slammed it shut two seconds later…”Hey, why don’t we invite over Tsu-kun as well?”

…But now she’s coming to Calgary…so those two can suck it. And hopefully her as well.

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Photos

Spring Training
Its coming...

Winter League
On the left is her...the only Montreal pitcher in the history of my winter league

Me and Teddy
Doing what we do

Chiaki!!!!!
The only photo I could find of her...I know you can't see shit but she's shy cuz she's asian and cant do math

Soon Hae
Ace pitcher for Teddy, fucking cock block for me (but still an amazing friend)