Valentine's Day in Scotland

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I'm going to start this out by saying that I really like Valentine's Day. It's just such a nice idea - a day where you can tell everyone that you love that you care about them (despite the fact that I didn't mail any of my cards hahahahaha! I really hate the post office!) and it doesn't matter if you're dating someone or not you because it doesn't have to be about that. There's no point in being bitter so all you debbie downers out there should just smile because someone was thinking about you yesterday!

That being said I think Scotland has a way worse perspective on Valentine's Day than other places. People either ignored that it was happening or got really mad. Ever article in the student paper was about how horrible V-Day is. I even had a relatively difficult time finding cards and other things. But this has by far been the most bizarre Valentine's Day ever. It would have been a strange normal day. I've had a lot of work this week so I haven't really done much besides have flat dinner on Tuesday (Ashley made an amazing lasagna and brought cookies back from her weekend trip to Amsterdam!). So I was excited to get out of my flat with my friends to have a very unromantic dinner. We had decided to go someplace that no couple would ever go - a falafel and kebab shop. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

Monday morning I had Social and Cultural Geography with this really stuffy 30ish year old woman who always wears black. Her name is Nina Morris and you can tell she's always in a bad mood unless she's picking on some helpless victim. Well Monday I was the victim. We were talking about what landscapes are associated with Scotland and England and someone had to write them down on the chalk board. Nina Morris always asks for a volunteer but it's at 9 am, of course no one is going to volunteer especially to go up in the front of class. So Nina went through her usual motions (with a huge grin on her face) of threatening us that she'll just pick someone if no one volunteers. So she called on someone. The girl in the pink frock. Me. Luckily not many people were in class but this wasn't so lucky when Nina then wanted to know what people associated with either England or Scotland. No one would talk! And Nina kept going on about how if no one answered the question that I was just going to look silly and that I didn't want to look silly. So she got frustrated and made me ask people. Even worse! I guess someone felt bad for me though and eventually started talking. Worse still! At 9 am when I have a cold and I'm made to stand at the front of a huge lecture my abilities to decipher what a Scottish person is saying declines... a lot. I thought someone said "lights" when they really said "lakes." Some girl was talking really fast about molars or something and I had no idea what she meant. Then she tried to spell it. "double o, double l, r, q, lmnop. I have no idea but eventually Nina Morris got frustrated enough that I couldn't write things down that she told me spell them however I liked and scolded the class for not knowing that writing on chalk boards was a very difficult skill to obtain. Great now I was the American who couldn't hear, spell, or write on chalk boards. I eventually was rewarded with a round of applause and Nina Morris saying that she wouldn't be in class on Wednesday and that Jane Jacobs(!!! just kidding not THE Jane Jacobs, I WISH!) would be there.

So Wednesday comes around and I go to class to find an even stuffier woman than Nina there. At least she knew how to work power points as apposed to Nina who has been there all semester. We talked about the Parliament building and how hideous it is. Apparently the woman conducted surveys about the Parliament building in taxis (my friend though she said Texas and was confused for the entire class. See it's not just me that can't understand people). But the class was interesting because we took a vote on if we liked it or not, most people didn't. Apparently it's the 8th most hated building in the UK but won all these awards in the architecture world. It looks like a block of cement with some bamboo and hairdryers on the outside. Professors here have a problem with getting to class on time and letting us out on time too so I got out of class a little late and went to an underground cafe that connects a few buildings on campus. I tried to get a bagel with cream cheese but when I opened it there were weird greens, tomatoes and onions on it too. Pretty gross. The cafe is really confusing because there is a section of food and drinks in a refrigerator shelf thing but then there is hot food on what looks like a dinning hall line. But there is never any food in the line. And you can make your own tea and hot chocolate but not coffee. And the prices aren't labeled on anything and there is no menu but it advertises that you can buy toasties there (a hot cheese sandwich sometimes with other things) and all this breakfast food. It's strange. So I read cynical Valentine's Day articles until my next class, Social History 2.

Dr. Fox, the nervous guy, is my prof for Social History. The class has a few Americans in it (whom I'm all good friends with now, actually going out with them tonight) and the rest are British students who took the first half of the course last semester. Well I don't know what was with Dr. Fox today but he was CRAZY. He came in late as usual and declared that the day's topic was medieval carnivals and ceremonies! Maybe he really liked this topic or something but he had even more pictures than usual. One picture in particular got him really excited. It was a picture of a guy with one leg and a woman who were displaying a picture of a woman mooning a crowd. He started to explain the picture but then it was as if he had an epiphany! He asked if anyone had seen the British sketch comedy show with Dudley Moore and someone else where one of the guys had one leg and went on an acting audition. Everyone just looked at him confused; I think one girl said she saw it. He was really offended and turned to the American section of the room and said that we couldn't leave without seeing it. Little did we know that by this he meant that he had to act it out right then and there! It was probably the best reenactment of a British sketch of a one legged man and an acting coach played by one person I've ever seen. It was obvious that Dr. Fox had memorized the entire thing and that his secret ambition/talent is for acting. He put on his trench coat and mocked one of those horrible British accents that are supposedly for poor people (you know what I mean) and jumped around the room on one leg. This went on for probably 3 minutes and we were all dying. It was as if all his weird neurosis was gone and Dr. Fox was a calm collected guy who loved to perform sketch comedy. Afterwards no one quite knew what to do until Gus started clapping and cheering and everyone went crazy. Then Dr. Fox went back to his old self as if nothing had happened and told us again that we really should see it. Afterwards I had Geomorphology where the kids behind me proceeded to comment on how tan the prof is. It is a little odd but I figured he was middle eastern or something. But apparently you could "never be that tan in Edinburgh! He must fake tan!" Then they compared him to Ross on that episode of Friends where he fake tans way too many times, and actually that's exactly how this guy looks.

So then that night my friends and I went out for dinner. We had to go somewhere that wouldn't be "coupley." We couldn't really decide if we wanted pizza, Thai, or falafel. There were six of us in all, and first we tried to get Thai but it was booked up and they said we could eat in 45 minutes or go somewhere else (but they said it nicer than that). So we got falafel with all the other uncoupled people that would go to a kebab shop on Valentine's Day. It was really fun too! And I love falafel so I was happy. Other people who didn't get falafel didn't really like their food as it was all fried and a little gross but it was a very fun time! Afterwards my friend Diana and I went and got a Magnum bar at a convenience store and then I went home to finish my paper. So that was my day, very interesting and lots of fun. I hope everyone at home had a good day as well!

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