A crying shame

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There is no in-between for babies - they are either the most cherished or the most hated people in the world. It all depends on the setting. They are so vacillating in their popularity. Most of the time they are a crowd-pleaser extraordinaire, soaking up all the attention, the awe (it's a shame that they can't be consciously aware that they'll never be that popular again). But then there are instances where babies are the antagonist, the most reviled in the room. Places like, say, the bus.

The British are funny about the bus (sorry, the 'coach'😉. They treat it like a movie theatre. As I began my bus trip to York, the driver, soothing in his deep accented English, got on the loudspeaker and announced, "Please turn your mobile phones to silent or vibrate, so as not to disturb the other passengers. If you are to use your phone, please keep your voice at narry a whisper. And if you wish to listen to an ipod or laptop, please ensure that the volume is set so that only you can hear the performance." Lovely. Done.

But then a mother gets on the bus with a baby.

Now is it just me or does a baby not make most of the above rather redundant? You can't switch a baby to vibrate. You can't request, "Please turn your baby to silence so as not to disturb the other passengers." Thus, the very sight of that baby is enough to make each and every passenger recoil in fright. Immediately everyone on the bus shifts from the window seat to the isle, no trace of subtely to their inner desires, 'Please don't let her sit next to me.' As the mother makes her way down the isle, carefully eyeing each and every one of you, prodding, choosing, as if she's a farmer about to pick the next chicken for the slaughter. Who will she ask to move over? The climax of 1984 beams through your head, "Do it to her. Not me. Anyone but me!!!!" Who will it be? Who is the sacrifice?

On this sunny day, it was me.

All right, Matt, what is the loudest thing you have on your Ipod? For the first time, I wish I listened to more hardrock. So, Greenday it is.

It wasn't enough.

5 hours later, I can pretty much deem myself an expert on baby crying, everything from the various pitches, rhythms, and crescendos. Did you know that a baby can even cry in its sleep? You do now.

York is a beautiful place, but it now has an even more resonating place in my heart. It will forever be the place that stopped the crying.

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