It happened to me again: Love at first sight

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Geo: 54.04, 19.04

Off to Malbork castle - but only after taking another load of laundry out of the machine. We've been doing laundry like crazy - almost all of the dishwashing liquid in the apartment is gone!

We stopped at a pastry shack on the way from the train station to Malbork castle. I had a donut that can only be described as a very bad Boston cream donut. The Polish simply don't know how to make a good dough - the texture was like that of bad bread. I also had some kind of glazed almond/poppyseed Danish - the same problem with the dough, but the filling was very tasty.

Malbork castle is pretty cool - it's the largest brick castle in the world. There was quite a bit to see - it's best to view the pictures for the commentary.

Mary Moment #51: Mary tried to rip off a "monk" that was selling freshly-minted coins. First, she tried to walk away without paying anything. And when the monk asked her to pay, she offered him Lithuanian money. Poor guy, just trying to make an honest living and Mary tries to scam him.

We finished up at the castle and grabbed a massive/good kebab on the way to the train station. Mary wolfed it down because of time constraints, and I wolfed it down because I'm a pig.

Mary-ism #22: "I wonder if I can fit ALL of it in my mouth?" Then after successfully doing so, "That was HUGE!" No explanation necessary.

After the kebab, Mary asked if she could have some chocolate to get rid of the onion taste in her mouth. What a lame excuse! If you want chocolate, just ask for it - no pretenses are necessary!

Back in Gdansk - we stopped at St. Mary's Church, the biggest brick church in the world. Mary was interested in seeing it only because it was named St. Mary's. It was supposed to be the home of Hans Memling's "Last Judgment" altarpiece, but it's currently on display at Gdansk's National Gallery. There is a bit of a fight over Memling's masterpiece, but St. Mary's has a copy of it on display.

Mary Moment #52: Mary's only comment about this exquisite piece of work was that "It's amazing that it is still a masterpiece considering the complete and utter lack of genitalia." Wow ... Dirty Mary strikes again! I was speechless ... can art only be considered a masterpiece if it proudly displays genitalia flailing about?

To get Mary over her disappointment at not seeing any genitalia today, we had some soft-serve ice cream that everyone seemed to be eating. We walked as we ate and I witnessed ... Mary Moment #53: In a maneuver that can only be described as the "Dirty Ice Cream Trick", Mary ate her ice cream in a very seductive and dirty way ... you had to be there to see it. Unfortunately for several families, their children saw the maneuver ... and all began crying that they could never eat ice cream again.

After using the internet to book my Frankfurt accommodations, we watched some TV at the apartment. Mary-ism #23: "Do you think the anchor lady is pretty? I think she is pretty pretty." Uh ... she may have been pretty attractive or quite pretty, but pretty pretty doesn't seem to be quite correct ...

We tried to get into Restaurant Goldwasser one more time. This time we were promptly seated by a waitress. The waiter from last night gave us the evil eye as we walked by ... it was reminiscent of the uni-brow baby from "The Simpsons", mixed in with the theme from "Psycho".

Don and Anne, a couple from Washington State, was sitting nearby and began chatting with us. You can tell that they are Rick Steves fans - usually, American seniors that are a little off the beaten path are! They are also taking the night train to Berlin tomorrow night. They remind me a little of Chuck and Eileen from last year's trip. Maybe we'll keep running into them all over the place as well!

They have a pretty neat story - they're retired, have sold everything, and are focusing on traveling. They had an RV a few years ago and toured around North America. Now they are focusing on European trips.

I tried Goldwasser, the local liquer served with what I think are actually little flecks of gold. Thick, sweet, and strong, it's a good sipping drink and a nice way to end off a meal. It's definitely not crappy like Balzam!

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Photos

a
Amber seems to be quite readily available in this part of the world - Malbork castle had a pretty extensive collection. This was supposed to be one of the prized pieces.

b
Malbork was once the home of the Teutonic knights - these are four of the Grand Masters.

c
Tiny little door. Who the hell could fit through there?

d
Malbork in ruins after WWII.

e
Mary with the monk that she tried to rip off. He's not actually hugging her, he's actually trying to grab her to stop her from running away without paying.

f
With his crossed legs and pained expression on his face, doesn't he look constipated? Fitting, because he's just down the hall from the toilets.

g
The Church of St. Mary - seriously in need of repair.

h
They used different coloured bricks for repairs over the years.

i
Time to pause for a kebab.

j
Seeing this well-endowed caricature we both thought exactly the same thing at exactly the same moment - Tri would love this!

k
Back in Gdansk at St. Mary's Church - Mary noticed the name of this guy and told me she hoped to one day marry someone with that last name.

l
Hans Memling's "Final Judgment".

m
Do you remember that tile in front of the Vilnius cathedral, where you are supposed to make a wish, close your eyes, and spin around three times? Well, what did I wish for on that day? World peace, and true love & happiness.
Well, the wish I made came true ... it was love at first sight, for the second time in my life. I was no match for her cool demeanour and seductive curves ... I was instantly hooked and begged her for a taste ... She felt the same way about me, too. How did I know? Because she melted every time my lips touched her ...

n
Mmmm ... squirrel-style fish ... is this a specialty imported from the good ol' southern USA? Is it on a culinary par with possum?

o
The first ice cream cone I was given was broken, so they stuck it in a second one. After I consumed the ice cream and cone, I was left with an empty, unused cone.
Mary marvelled at how incredible it was that I could eat an ice cream cone so cleanly. I told her that it was a magic cone ... and she believed me for a short time. Then I told her that I have a magic tongue - she REALLY wanted to believe that ...

p
Dinner at Goldwasser - we wanted to try the chanterelle pierogi, but the were out. We started with the lobster soup - more like a bisque, it was good but needed a touch more salt. It was accompanied by the best buns we have had in the Baltics - tiny, crisp little balls of warm, chewy dough. A very nice dish, especially when accompanied by the Zwyiec beer.

q
I had the Hunter's stew - not really a stew, but more a saucy collection of pork sausage and cabbage chunks. A little tart, and OK-tasting.

r
Mary had the salmon stuffed with chanterelles, sprouts, tomatoes, and lettuce. Kind of like a roulade, we were expecting the salmon to be cooked, not cured. It was surprisingly good with surprisingly elegant execution.

s
Goldwasser. Gold-ilicious.