European Getaway - Day 18 - Berlin to Amsterdam

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Day 18 - Berlin to Amsterdam

A long, long travel day today, as we pass through Deutschland to the Netherlands. Today I sit with Brunette Mel on the coach. I’ve tried to make an effort to sit with different people on the coach, I have been sat with Trent quite a bit but have had spells with Lucy, Chin, Josh, Brendan, Tammy and now Mel.

There is no day stop today, it’s a straight run through to Amsterdam. Again my memories of the trip today aren’t that good, the coach journeys were part and parcel of the tour and they were a good opportunity to talk to other people or catch up on sleep. I imagine this journey started with quite a few people being asleep after the pub crawl last night. We stop at a service station and I buy a cornetto, I get a few odd looks from my bus mates, as they are all freezing but it was quite a warm day. These soft aussies (and kiwis), they think it’s cold all the time on this trip, then they put on a jumper (or as they say Jomper), and they’re fine for the rest of the day.

We stop for lunch which is another picnic affair, although this will be the last picnic of the trip. The usual salady sort of stuff as I recall. After lunch Annaliese is struggling a bit with back pain, she looks as though she’s in agony. She gets back on the bus and lies down in the aisle, a trick started by Ryan and Andrea, I dunno how comfortable it was but seems popular.

In the late afternoon we arrive at our clog and cheese presentation. The guy is a bit crazy and spends the whole presentation flirting with the girls. After the presentation, which is a genuine presentation, we are lead to the shop, unfortunately the Aussie and Kiwi governments don’t allow the importation of most foods, including cheese. Therefore myself and the Mexicans are the only people who can take cheese home. I buy a small slab for the family.

We then head into Amsterdam, passing picturesque canals and windmills, all we needed were a few tulips and it would be perfect.

We pass by the Heineken brewery on our approach to Amsterdam and then arrive near our hostel. Now I was aware prior to this trip that our hostel (although labelled as a hotel) has been voted the worst in Europe, and is famous for being filthy. We arrive at the Hans Brinker and it lives up to its expectation. We have a six bed room, for five of us, I am rooming with John, Paul, Ryan and Gerard. I manage to wangle a whole bunk for myself, however notice that there are no ladders to the top bunks, which is a bitch. One of the towels provided has mould on it, and the Ryan reports that the shower is either scalding hot, or cold, nothing between.

Tonight we are attending a sex show, which is a hot topic of conversation. Everyone is aware that the show has audience participation, and that if you sit near the front, you increase your chances of being picked. There are some people who want to go down the front and others such as myself who want to be near the back.
Jess leads us through the streets of Amsterdam towards the Red Light District. There is a main street full of adult shops, peep shows and porno shops. It’s quite amusing. We arrive at a bridge and are given 30 mins to get dinner. I head for a stir fry which is a bit scary as I have never eaten this sort of food before. I ask Momma Jac for advice and I get egg noodles, pork and Black bean and soy sauce. It’s quite tasty and has all sorts of veg in it. We then head over for the sex show. We get inside and thankfully all the remaining seats are near the back. The show begins with a stripper who squirts some water from her boobs, the next act involves a guy from the other topdeck group (with a really hot cowgirl) and the next act was hilarious as the lady picked Paul from the crowd and stripped and then proceeded to pull a good length of ribbon from her intimate area. Paul was quite embarrassed. The next act was a man and woman having sex and then finally a woman came on with a banana and got various people to eat banana from various places on her body. John, Gerard and Josh are pulled up from our group, I shit myself as I am sat next to Josh, and could so nearly have been picked myself.

Afterwards Jess guides us through the red light district. It is a crazy experience, some of the ladies are very pretty, it’s also amazing to see how many curtains are closed, ie the girl is busy providing services. We are lead down skinny alley, which is a tight alley with windows on both sides, full of thin girls, we then head to fat alley, which is wider and so are the ladies. We then head to an Irish bar and decide what to do next. About two thirds of the group decide they want to go to a coffee shop to try the legal drugs. Personally I would never take drugs and don’t want to go to a coffee shop, so a group of us decide to go for a walk.
Myself, Gerard and Trent go for another walk around the RLD, out of general interest, Gerard asks a girl how much she costs, the answer being €50, which leads me to try and work out who costs more, an amsterdam prostitute or my own taxation services (in conclusion the prostitute costs slightly more, but I'm sure I'm better value for money)We then head to a different Irish bar for a few drinks, and meet up with Annaliese, Mel, Mel, Lucy, John and Brendan.We hang around for a bit and then head back to the hostel.

On the way back I make a trip to Mackers and bump into Nicole, Kat, Kit (Kiwi Kat, referred to as Kit, due to the kiwi accent) and Nat. Nicole and Kat seem absolutely wasted and I’m not sure they know who we are when we bump into them. Back at the hostel Ryan is outside and slightly wasted. We then head back to the room, and a couple of the girls come back for a chat. Ryan is really wasted, he starts trying to grate his head on the top bunk, crazy. Everyone then falls asleep, which causes issues when John and Gerard arrive back and the girls are asleep in our room.

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