All I Want For Christmas Is A Dukla Prague Away Kit

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April 2nd 2017

Published: April 10th 2017

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John Miranda

Brno

It was busy, busy at Olomouc Hln railway station at 0815 on a Saturday morning. The bright sunshine had prompted the good folk of the city to go on a trip. We had hunters, walkers and fisherman all clad in a range of camouflage gear. They carried the tools of the trade - fishing rods, walking poles and rifles! There was much evidence that Baden Powell scouting is alive and well in central Europe. An assortment of pack leaders were assembling their troops for a weekend of camping and tying knots. "Beetle" Bailey would be looking down with a satisfied smile. The old fashioned Station Manager was on hand with his comical red peaked cap to watch over his domain and make sure all was proceeding smoothly. Czech trains are now facing competition from a number of private operators, so in addition to their own ticket counters the representatives from Regiojet and Leo Express were also present. The competition seems intent on cherry picking passengers on key routes to Prague and onwards to Germany in the west or Slovakia in the east, which is fine if you happen to be traveling there. Brno was not on their destination lists. Shame, really.

Villa Tesar

The Regiojet tilting pendolino trains – similar to those operated on the West Coast line in the UK by Virgin – look quite impressive. It makes Olomouc a day trip from Prague. I made a note for the future. Two trains to Brno pulled into adjacent platforms at the same time. One was the long route and the other was the more direct route. I studied them carefully to ensure I did not make the same mistake I had on the outbound journey. We pulled out towards Brno on time and within minutes my ticket had been checked by the conductor to confirm I had not made a blunder this time. The only disappointment was the train had no wi-fi, so I was unable to keep the Other Half on my progress this morning.

The initial stages of the journey were uneventful. Flat, agricultural land. The villages were largely still asleep. My attention was taken at Nezamyslice, where the platform arrangements made passengers wander across the tracks to access the Brno bound special. All was well. It was all part of the normal routine for catching a train for the locals. We began our approach to Brno.

FK Zobrojvka Brno v FK Dukla Praha

I was quite familiar with the geography and as I saw the ground of Slovan Brno, I figured it was time to gather my possessions. The train then takes a sweep away from the centre, which is a bit disconcerting and makes you think if you are really on the right train. We finally approach the station from a completely different direction. We entered alongside a packed Graz to Prague express.

I walked across the road in search of a 24 hour tram ticket and the correct platform for the Number 8. I would be at my accommodation in 5 minutes or so. I normally scour the destination city for alternative sports, but I knew the ice hockey season was effectively over so I hadn't paid too much attention. Mistake! I had alighted right next to the HC Kometa Brno stadium. They were in the play offs and there was a game on Sunday evening. Ice hockey is a strong sport in the Czech Republic and it is among the highest ranked leagues in Europe. The locals take the game a lot more seriously than they do football, so the question is would I get a ticket?

Brno

I walked the 100 metres or so to my hotel. It was only 11:30, but the temperature had already climbed. The display boards on the tram stops suggested that it was in excess of 20 degrees already. I was severely tempted by a refreshment on route. I resisted. Fortunately, my room had been cleaned already and was available. I dropped my bag, ditched my jacket and set off to study architecture. On the last trip to Brno, I manged to visit the Villa Tugendhat and Villa Stiassny - see my other blogs from last year. This time I was of a mind to take a stroll in the area near the latter - Brno district - where a whole area was developed by experimental modernist architects. A walking trail is available, although just look for the white markings outside on the pavement outside each house of relevance and it is quite easy to follow and just view a few. Alas, the topography. The Pisarky District is built on a hill and the baking sun made it hard work walking around. The views of some properties is not great and the angle of the sun made for impossible photography. The

Ernst Low-Beer Villa

.....cousin of the owners of Villa Tugendhat

houses remain in private ownership, so you can't just wander into the gardens. However, it was still a worthwhile mini expedition. The Villa Ernst Low-Beer (1935) round the corner has connections to the owners of the famous Villa Tugendhat. It was split into 4 flats in the Communist period and remains so to this day. I got talking to the current owner of Villa Tesar. It dated from 1938 and had been restored back to the original condition with the same colour scheme of a pastel blue. The house had been designed by the grandfather of the current lady of the house. I made my way back down the hill to find a tram and was back at the central railway station with 15 minutes. My afternoon entertainment was in the Komarov District, south of the city centre. I knew Tram 12 went to within 100 metres of my target destination. However, I had picked a weekend where this tram line was on diversion and this section of track was not being served. My Czech language skills must have been on the up, as I manged to decipher from the overhead display that a choice of 3 buses would get

Brno

me to where I needed. I studied Maps.me with great intensity as the bus headed off, just to make sure I had not made a mistake. I found Sparta Brno hiding behind a Jaguar Land Rover dealership.

You will see a purely coincidental theme building. Last week, I was basking in the sunshine in Scotland watching Spartans of the Lowland League. Today, it was the Brno branch of Spartans - Sparta at the 800 capacity Komarovsky Stadium. They started life as Red Star in 1921 and have had various incarnations, names and mergers since foundation in 1923. Today, they have reverted to the traditional name and we're decked out in the same maroon colours worn by the better known Prague team of the same name. The surroundings were a bit more basic than the Letna, but what do you expect for an entry price of 30 Czech Crowns. A club house, that doubled as an Indian restaurant was behind one goal and a single row of blue seats with a simple cover down one side. The restaurant had a terrace from which a fair number were watching, whilst indulging in another Czech national sport of sinking ale.

Brno

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There was no sign in participation in Indian snacks. It was unseasonably warm for football in March, but both teams were energetic in pursuit of the advantage. Sparta were struggling in the Moravia Regional Premier League, but looked much the better team. They should have been 2 up .... you knew when the crucial 2nd goal chance hit the bar, that it would come back to haunt them. FK Tatran Bohunice duly hot their equaliser in the 2nd half and the game fizzled out in the heat. The crowd was officially given as 150, so all the drinkers in the bar were included. There were even 2 Non League Dogs. I was on hand to take a snap of a slight altercation between the 2 canines, who were keen to liven up proceedings at half time. Non League Dogs. Czech version.

The lack of a normal tram 12 caused a bit of anxiety, but 45 minutes later and I was sat in the A Sport Hotel ready for my second football installment of the day. Dukla Prague away. Dukla Prague away at Zbrojovka Brno that is! The iconic Half Man Half Biscuit song ..... All I Want

Brno

Cathedral

For Christmas Is a Dukla Prague Away Kit ..... has probably inspired similar trips, although in fairness the mystic of the Czech secret police team has faded since the Velvet Revolution changed a few things in 1989. Dukla no longer "win" titles, but after a spell in the wilderness are now a regular in the Czech top flight again. The song is of course based on times when great European games were not in the Champions League between 2 sets of overpaid players, but of games of Subbuteo played by on dining room tables all over the country between teams you could never imagine seeing live. They only took place of course if somebody you knew with Subbuteo managed to get a "crack" European side as a Christmas present. Why were all European teams described as "crack"? The song lyrics talk of dodgy penalties - which in real life in those days could be bought by Belgians at the expense of the Trees- and smashing up floodlights. I gazed up at the sky. The Metsky Fotbalovy Stadion Srbska had a proper set of old school floodlights, not akin to the Subbuteo versions. Perfect!

I bought my ticket

Brno

from the portacabin that doubled as a ticket office, which had slightly more activity than at Sigma Olomouc last night. Well a bit more anyway. There was 1 other person, besides myself. 150 Czech Crowns buys any seat in the house. I opted for Block L to sit in the shade, although the reality was sit where you like anywhere down that side of the ground. Programmes were on sale at 20 Crowns. I ordered a pint in the hotel and studied the programme.

The Mestsky Fotbalovy Stadion Srbska reminded me of afternoons spent in SW6, except there was no gigantic East Stand looming over proceedings. If anything the temperature had climbed higher as we approached the 1700 hours kick off, which didn't bode well for 90 minutes high energy football. The Dukla Prague away following comprised of 29, who brought 4 flags and occasionally chanted "Dukla" without any great conviction. Three member of the local constabulary watched over them, in more of a parental fashion than menace, as though they weren't expecting a difficult afternoon. One of the flags was emblazoned with the word Portsmouth, was the English fan section intent on seeing Dukla

Brno

away in as many grounds as possible? FK Zbrojovka Brno have reverted to one of their original names, having spent a few years in the 1990s using the advertising moniker of Boby. I suggest it was possible to get a chant of Boby going much easier than the reeling off the name of a weapons manufacturer. This possibly explained the total lack of atmosphere. The match didn't help. My instincts with the weather were correct. An atrocious 0-0 draw was played out in the sun. A handy looking Zbrojovka Brno lad dressed in a Feyenoord top hung a long banner on the fence in front of me, but they used the majority of their energies thereafter in climbing to the bar in a bid to drink away their possible relegation troubles. The good news was that nobody smashed up any floodlights. Shame about the the away kit, but hey! I nipped in the hotel bar again for a swift pint and to use the wi-fi, whilst the 3216 dispersed. I finished off the evening in the city centre and after studying my fellow drinkers for a while, wondered just how the average Czech manages to walk after the level of

Brno

alcohol consumption.

Appendix 1

Moravia Krajesky Prebor Liga

FK Sparta Brno 1 TJ Tatran Bohunice 1

Date: 1 April 2017 @ 1400 Hours

Venue: Komarov Stadion, Komarov, Brno

Attendance: 150

Goals: 1-0 Loprais (26 Min), 1-1 Mach (54 Min)

Appendix 2

ePojisteni Liga (Czech 1st Division)

FK Zbrojovka Brno 0 FK Dukla Praha 0

Date: 1 April 2017 @ 1700 Hours

Venue: Mestsky Fotbalovy Stadion Srbska, Brno

Attendance: 3,216

Goals: None

Additional photos below

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