Fair Antigua.. Denis, a man on a Mission!!

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These two sea days are taking their toll on the little grey cells. There are up to five trivia session a day so I won't write about our progress unless something eventful happens. I don't want you to think we come on a cruise just to play trivia. It would be cheaper to join a local pub team!!

So, five trivia played. Won three. The last one was tough in as much as I knew Yaks milk is pink, Charlie Chaplin's cane was made from Bamboo and the eldest Marx brother was Harpo. Despite knowing these we still managed to put the wrong answer. When you have amassed so much trivial knowledge it's inevitable that the odd snippet will get misfiled somewhere in your brain. Although we talked ourselves out of the correct answer on several occasions, we still managed to win even though we had somehow adopted a couple of liabilities who, for the sake of argument we will call Marilyn and Liz from Tampa who thought La-La, Tinky Winky, Dipsy and Po were names for the Spice Girls and Hercules's father was Bathsheba but to be fair she thought the question was 'Who was Hercules's barber!!'

There was heavy rain throughout most of the night on day two. The clocks went forward 1 hour so now we are only 4 hours behind the UK. At 8am the sun once again was shining and the clouds dispersing.

Each day at 12 noon the Officer of the Watch makes an announcement as to our progress, sea state, weather ahead and the odd snippet of information. So far we have been cruising with an average depth below the keel of around 5000m. Today we sailed over the Puerto Rican trench. This is the deepest part of the Atlantic Ocean at a depth of 8962m or 29,400ft. That means the depth is deeper than Mount Everest is high

Roisin noticed that we have a leak in our stateroom by the bathroom. To enter the bathroom, there is a step up. It is along the side of this step that there is very definite water seepage. It started out as a small pool of water but has now spread along the bulkhead. Is it possible to get rising damp on a ship?? Either there is a cracked pipe somewhere or our ship has sprung a leak!! Monchai, our cabin steward has reported it but as yet no one has come to check it out. His solution, meantime is to leave towels down to soak up the water and to stop the spread in to the main area of the cabin.

We bumped in to Noreen in the lift. Her arm was heavily strapped but she was still in a buoyant mood enjoying the fuss by all accounts. This spritely 82 year old told us she is slightly disappointed that she has had to cancel two of her favourite excursions: zip lining and snorkelling!!! What testament to octogenarianism (if that's a word!!) I hope we're as active when we're her age. Roisin pointed out that we're not even that active now!!

This evening, our second day at sea was the 1^st of two formal evenings where it is tradition for the men to wear tuxedo, bow tie and ladies, evening dress. The ‘formal' or ‘gala' evenings usually follow a day at sea so as people aren't rushing to get ready after a full day out in port. However, this didn't stop some passengers walking around in baggy shorts and flip-flops while the Captain was introducing his senior officers. This is another tradition that during the 1^st gala evening, the captain invites all guests to attend a champagne reception which usually includes a champagne waterfall. In this case, 648 champagne glasses were arranged in a pyramid formation with one glass remaining atop in which the ‘ship' champagne was poured. (I'm sure that was what the crew called it unless I've misheard!!) This then overflowed and cascaded down through the other glasses.

We ate in the Concerto restaurant asking, as always for a table for two. The table we were shown to had another table for two adjacent. They were so close together it may have well been a table for four!! As it turns out, our American neighbours from Illinois were very chatty.

I've been said I look like a lot of things but I've never been compared to Gordon Ramsey before! I overheard the lady speaking to Roisin as I was engrossed in a conversation with her husband about how America was build and the ruthless business conducted by Vanderbilt and Rockefeller in the control over the oil and the railroads in the late 19^th century and early 20^th century! In turn, I told the lady that I thought she looked like Sofia Loren for which she thanked me. Strange, since that wasn't mean to be a compliment!!!

That evening back in our cabin, Monchai had laid a fresh towel down in front of the bathroom. Earlier he had assured us that the leak had been fixed. This towel felt bone dry. We're hoping the towel remains ‘dryish' tomorrow morning otherwise Monchai's boss will be getting a call.

To our surprise and probably Monchai's relief the towel was dry the following morning. I saw Monchai who again assured us that the leak is fixed and now someone is coming to dry the carpet out today. We can't complain at that. Our cabin steward has come through for us so far.

So, we have arrived in St Johns, the capital of the island of Antigua. Today is the only day we have an organised excursion. We plan to visit Shirley Heights, English Harbour and Nelson's dock yard. These are all on the other side of the island and as we never got to see them in 2008 when we spent two weeks in Antigua, we decided now is our chance!! Our tickets told us to meet at 08:50, not in the theatre or another on board lounge but on the quayside. This seemed to do away with everyone trying to get ashore at once. We walked straight off the ship at 08:30 and soon found a young local girl waving a laminated card that said ANU105a. This matched the tour number on our ticket so we waited until all those signed up for the tour were present and accounted for.

Shortly before 9am, we were led to our vehicle, a 30-seater bus. The driver, a 72 year old local introduced himself as Denis Friday, our driver AND tour guide.

The bus started up and we were on our way. We headed down the main street from the port, passed the two story wooden buildings that aligned the Main Street all painted to their own style in a multitude of colours and then we were out in to the open country. Carrying straight ahead, we passed the Viv Richards stadium on our left. This is primarily used for cricket but can be adapted for other sports as well. Before we had travelled 50 yards, Denis started off with a short prayer. This was slightly worrying on three levels. Firstly the mic he was using was hand held. Secondly he had his hands pressed together and eyes tight shut and thirdly we were still moving!!!

Somehow, I felt like I'd been kidnapped by a religious cult as for the first few minutes Denis was giving praise to the Almighty: ‘God is Good, God is awesome. We were all his brothers and sisters. Praise the Lord for all you see around you' Now I don't know if some of the other passengers were caught up in the moment or just humouring Denis but there were murmurs of ‘Hallelujah' and ‘A-men brother' from the back of the bus!!

He then started rambling on about the virtues of a good wife. Denis turned to the man riding shotgun, and asked ‘What's your wife's name, brother?'

‘What's my name? Ralph!!', came the reply to rapturous laughter amongst the other passengers obviously mishearing Denis. ‘Well, that's a mighty pretty name for your wife if not a little bizarre but hey we're all here to have a good time and god doesn't judge us one bit. His power is awesome!'

Antigua (and Barbuda) are located in the centre of the Leeward Islands in the Eastern Caribbean. Antigua, the largest of all the English-speaking Leeward Islands, is 108 square miles, 14 miles long and 11 miles wide. Barbuda lies 30 miles due north and is 68 square miles. The island was formed by volcanoes and its first settlement can be dated back to 2400 B.C.

Denis Friday was now cooking on gas. He hadn't praised the Lord for almost 10 minutes and was producing fact after fact about the island. Did you know, for example that the sport of crab racing is unique to Antigua, with races held every week. They must either have very big crabs on Antigua or very small jockeys!!

Our first stop was the blockhouse. These are now only ruins, built in the 16^th /17^th century, where once stood a state of the art garrison on the hill overlooking one of the main harbours of the time. It is now just part of the picturesque coast line. Many famous stars have bought property on the island such as Eddie Murphy and Mariah Carey. Denis pointed out Eric ‘slow-hand' Clapton's mansion in the distance below.

Only five minutes further along we reached the headland known as Shirley Heights. A popular vantage point where every Friday in the month, locals and tourists populate this spot, set up their barbeques, crack open the beer and rum and party whilst watching the sun set over the Caribbean.

Shirley Heights looks over the English Harbour which is still an active marina to this day. This spot is named after one of the British Naval Commanders of the 18^th century. Poor Shirley probably got more stick by his mates for his name that the man's poor wife, Ralph does!!'

When Admiral Horatio Nelson sailed into Antigua in 1784, he had little reason to believe that the port would develop into one of Great Britain's most important military bases in the Caribbean, but it did. Located in the English Harbour, the 19th-century dockyard that once served as the headquarters of the British naval fleet of the Leeward Islands has been converted into a museum and national park. This was our final stop. Where we had 50 minutes to wander around and explore.

Nelsons dock yard is still a working port where yachts arrive from abroad. For this reason there is a Customs & Excise shed where the owner/captain can lodge the landing documents and or/customs entries. We watched the officer on duty stamp a few forms and give advice to a couple of people then Roisin approached the customs official. He wore a crisp white shirt and his epaulettes indicated four bars. He smiled as we approached.

‘Any chance of a quick photo', Roisin asked.

‘Sorry, no photos allowed'. Came the reply from the Officer still with a friendly smile on his face

Roisin said, ‘It's just that we used to work for Customs & Excise back in the UK'

‘Oh, well then I'm sure I can made an exception this once.' He didn't even ask to see my ID card or anything.

The original capstans are still in place in Nelson's dockyard where a team would clean the barnacles from the keel of a ship by wrapping ropes from the mast around the capstan. This would tilt the ship on to its side where the barnacles could then be scraped off the visible half of the keel. This process was repeated in reverse to clean the other half of the keel. The workmen only had four half days per year annual leave and earn nine pence in that time! It took on average six months to clean the keel of a ship.

On entering Nelson's dock yard we were given a drinks voucher entitling the holder to receive a free drink. Either non-alcoholic or in my case a glass of rum punch that I now know to have been 151 percent proof. I am told that I only took one sip then I started rambling about the crab racing. I vaguely remember saying something like: ‘Let's go shee the crab rayshing. If there's one called ‘pinchy' I'm backing it!! That's what Homer Simpson called his pet lobster, don't you know??' I made it back to the bus before passing out!!

I awoke to joyous melody! We were all having a right old sing song. It felt like I was back on a Sunday school outing!! Denis was giving us a bio of Harry Belafonte before breaking in to:

Day-o, day-o
Daylight come and me wan' go home
Day, me say day, me say day, me say day
Me say day, me say day-o
Daylight come and me wan' go home

Come, Mister tally man, tally me banana
Daylight come and me wan' go home…

Before long, Denis had the whole bus singing along. He led on a few more calypso favorites before finishing on a rousing chorus of the national anthem, ‘Fair Antigua and Barbuda'!

Back on board and Monchai has once again delivered. Our carpet is completely dried out and stain free.

As we pulled away from the quay at 6pm on the dot, we reversed passed the Jewel of the Seas. I noticed a climbing wall at the rear of the funnel of this Royal Caribbean ship. Later on I happened to mention to the Hotel Manager, Martin Bristow from Southampton now living in Mexico, that the Princess fleet lacked something similar.

‘Have you seen most of the clientele that travel with Princess? Most won't climb the stairs!!!' quipped Martin. He continued, ‘...the only way you're going to get them to climb a wall is if you stick a buffet at the top!!!' (Thanks to Donny C for the inspiration for this anecdote!!)

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Comments

[Jim Barrington]

grossly over paid public servant

[chris-roisin]

...and long may it continue, Jim!! (such a great comment you posted it twice!!)