Monkey Business

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Last week the director of my school asked me to go along with some foreign teachers from different provinces (as well as a couple Thai teachers to translate) to do an English camp for the directors and sub-directors of schools in the Lopburi province. I looked up Lopburi in my guide book and what is it famous for? Instead of Bangkok's stray dogs, Lopburi is overrun with monkeys. I agreed immediately.

They told me to pack my bags on Friday morning and bring them to school because we (another teacher and I) would be leaving in the afternoon. Luxury travelling, they told us, in a van with air conditioning and a very friendly driver. So Friday afternoon I finished teaching at 2:50 and they were supposed to pick me up at 3:00. 3:00 came and went... but that's okay, I understand Thai time. They say 3:00, they mean 3:30 or later. So 3:30 came and went, then 4:30...then someone came to tell me that I should go home and that they would pick me up at the house at 6:00.

Fine, the house. So I went back, had a shower and looked over my guidebook. 6:00 came and went...7:00 came and went...At times I started to get stressed but I told myself the Thai motto "Mai bpen rai" over and over again; whatever happens, everything will work out! If they don't come and I end up staying in Khunhan this weekend, I will still have fun, maybe even more fun! I had just about convinced myself that I didn't really want to go after all and I would just love to stay in Khunhan when, at 8:00pm, the truck showed up.

They opened the door to the backseat for me where there were two old, bald, and very fat "farang" (foreigner) men. I squeezed into the side and tried to stay close to the door, but it was impossible not to be swallowed up by them. So there was the Thai driver, my fellow teacher Pee Ong in the front seat, us three farang in the back seat (highly unfair as we all have way longer legs than the Thais) and then two more Thais in the back of the truck. I immediately thought, "I want to go back to Khunhan!"

They informed me that it would take between 7 and 8 hours to reach Lopburi. My depression deepened. As we rode, I began to enjoy the company of everyone in the truck (especially the obnoxious American man, actually). It didn't get more comfortable, though. People moved around -- the American went to the back to have more leg room, an old funny Thai man named Mr. Tongbai came up and told us funny stories about monkeys and elephants, and the Englishman moved to the front seat. I stayed where I was though... people are worried about men being comfortable but really don't give a thought to women at all.

When we (finally) stopped for a bathroom break after about 4 hours, I thought I would never walk again, my legs hurt so much. I couldn't unbend them and was wincing with every step. Before they had a chance to stretch out, we were squashed back in the truck again.

We arrived at about 3am and got into the hotel by 3:30. The prospect of teaching the entire day starting at 9am was daunting, to say the least! They woke us at 6:30 for breakfast, so hmmm, a total of 3 hours sleep max? For breakfast there was rice and meat and doughnuts. So I ate rice and doughnuts.

Then we had to go to make a speech to the directors and sub-directors (scary thought at first, but I have realized now never to be afraid of speeches here... the fact that I can speak English makes me a brilliant orator no matter what comes out of my mouth). These are very intimidating people -- in Thai culture the way you wai the director of a school is just below where you wai the king and Buddha. They were all very serious looking with a "concentrated business" kind of expression. In every school here there is a director (always a man) and 2 subdirectors: one woman and one man. So men were definitely the majority here.

They put us in classrooms with groups of 5-7 of them at a time and told us: Teach them to speak English! In 2 days! Okay! Go!

We had 30 minutes with each group: not a lot of time! So I taught how to politely order things in a restaurant... and then I taught them Apples, Peaches, Pears, and Plums as well as an Elephant song (an English translation of a traditional Thai song). It was so hilarious to see these very serious, very important, unsmiling people dancing around and yelling at the top of their lungs.

The second day I taught them how to casually discuss the weather with each other, showing them pictures of Canada and asking them "What's the weather like?" "What season is it?". Then I taught them "It's raining, it's pouring, the old man is snoring." And of course I made up actions to all these songs. They loved it and by the end when they would see me coming down the hallway they would say, "Banana na, na, naaaa na!" It was great fun.

All the Thais had fun trying to teach me the alphabet (yes, I am still working on the alphabet. It is hard!!) and I learned a few songs in Thai.

On Sunday after the camp was over, we went to see the monkeys of Lopburi! It was amazing... they run wild in this city! Apparently the Buddhist principal of not taking life prevents the city from controlling the monkey population (I wonder why this rule doesn't allow them to understand the concept of vegetarianism?) so they just multiply and run all over the monuments and roads and buildings and in the shops. They are also quite used to tourists, so if you put down your arm to the ground, they will scamper right up it and sit on your shoulder, looking for peanuts.

It was a great experience! I was so tired after the weekend of incessant teaching and singing and monkeys that I slept most of the way home (though I was in my same uncomfortable spot in the truck!) and was so surprised when they told me, "Dawn, we're home!" I said, "Already?" and they all laughed.

When I wasn't sleeping, I was sitting with my eyes closed and trying to absorb Thai. The Englishman and the American were sitting in the back, so it was me and five Thais. They talked like crazy and when I had heard a word enough times to recognize it coming back, I would open my eyes and ask someone what it meant. At first I was getting kind of stressed about how I had to learn Thai, and quickly! But I always forget that one of my favorite parts of the language experience is the process and how unique that feeling is of gradually coming to understand the topic of conversation without really knowing any of the words that make it up!

One of my favorite language games to play with myself is to listen to the strings of words as they are talking, words that are meaningless to me, and imagine what they could be talking about. When I hear a word that I recognize (maybe one in every 2000 words) my concept of the topic of conversation shifts to include that word. This way I can hear the way the rhythm of the language works without getting frustrated.

Speaking is a different matter altogether! I have learned how to say to the students, "Repeat after me," "Very clever," and "Please speak louder." In terms of answering questions that are asked of me, I am not doing so well. Today I made up a new rule (and convinced Pee Orathai to agree) that I would speak English only within the school, to the teachers and students because everyone there wants to practice their English. Everywhere else, I would speak Thai or be mute. So today on the way to the market she taught me the phrases, "What's this?" and "What colour is this?" and I asked her about everything we saw and then we traded positions. I think this way should help a little!

Wherever I walk in this town, heads turn... Going to the market is such fun because everyone looks at me all the time!
This is because I am so funny-looking and monstrously tall and white and probably because they think I look like some sort of alien from outer space, but I can't help but love the attention! I guess any attention is better than no attention. Ah, the spotlight!

At the school (and everywhere, really) I feel sort of like a celebrity. Whenever the director has special guests, I am summoned to smile at them and wai even though mostly they can't speak English, and just basically so that he can show of how prestigious his school is because they have a foreign English teacher. Today the guests were some soldiers that protect the border between Thailand and Cambodia, dressed in full army dress. Through a translator, they told me about how they live in the jungle and patrol the border. Often there are English speaking tourists that come to cross into Cambodia and they don't know how to tell them things like "Don't go there! It's dangerous!" or "There's a land mine over there." And they would like English lessons 😊

So the director mentioned something indirectly to one of the other English teachers that he might try to make a little program where teachers from the school go once or twice a month to teach the soldiers a little bit of English. I hope it starts when I am here so I can see the Cambodian border and the jungle!

Now I am rather

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Photos

One evil monkey
Not really evil at all, but with the menacing rain clouds in the background he looks that way!

Monkeys everywhere!
Pee Ong recovering from a monkey-pulling-the-hair incident

Foreigners Pay More
The top part says: Admission 10 Baht

Monkey Lane
The monkeys run alongside the cars...

Comments

[Mom]

teaching English
Congratulations on the awesome job you are doing teaching English over there - it sounds so rewarding !! I heard the monkeys were very scary but I guess it depends on who you talk to.... Keep up the fantastic attitude ! Love Mom