The hardest day of my life...

I woke up a few times last night. It was the first time in my life I had felt claustrophobic. Our rooms were small and dark with 9"x9" skylights. Felt scared by this window and wondered what my Grandad felt in his Japanese Prisoner War Camp, managed some sleep.
The morning was very cold put on my balaclava and goretex coat.

When we arrived at Gorak Shep I already felt dizzy and sick. We were comforted by the option of choosiung a dish of the menu. Most elected for cheese omelete and chips. with hindsight this was problably not a good idea. I think I have lost weight. Many of us fantacise about being at home and eating a good steak or another favorite dish.

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**Completed entry 28 Nov**

20-30 steps head pounding, feeling sick stop, breath, carry on. Always asking will I make it? the doctor accompanies as I struggle to camp camp. I think about Helen and about how hard this is. I can see the helicopter that crashed at Base camp back in the 70s but it isn't getting closer. 10 minutes more the doctor says . Felt low. Then suddenly I'm there. don't know how but I'm there. Exhilaration is overtaken by exhaustion. I hide a few tears behind my sunglasses. I've done it. Get some photos eat some peanuts and then realise my down jacket is riped on the arm. Sandra helps me fix it with some of the Micropur that I have on me. Because I'm the last to Base Camp time is short and we have to leave before the cloud comes up the valley. We got off the morraine quickly, somehow I have more energy. The journey was hellish. I retched three times before we got back to Gorak Shep but nothing came up. Felt really bad. The prize meal is Yak Steak. Meat is rare is these parts but I turn it down and go to bed. I have never undertaken anything so hard in my life. I had already decided not to ascend Kala Pattar the following day. I needed to muster my energy now for the journey home. It was never about the mountain for me. It was always about those 200 people. I acheived what I set out to do all those months ago. I only hoped that the prestige of the name Everest has encouraged people to donate.

Despite my refusal of food, Zane my room mate brings me some anyway and tells me to get some down my neck. It's a kind gesture. I get a few chips down and sleep.

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