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Published: August 5th 2009
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We picked up our local guide Sully at the Vietnamese-Laos border and during our ride to Vientiane he spoke to us about how his country holds the unfortunate title of being the most bombed country on earth. The United States dropped 80 million cluster bombs and over two million tons of explosives on Laos over a 9 year period during their ‘secret war’ fighting the North Vietnamese. More bombs were dropped in Laos than were dropped by every side in Europe during the whole of World War II. There are still hundreds of thousands of unexploded mines throughout the country, still inflicting death 30 years on.
Despite a harsh and terrible history, Laos should also hold the title for the friendliest place on earth, and arguably the most beautiful. Halfway between the border and Laos’ capital Vientiane we stopped at the top of a mountain, with a great lookout over the limestone mountains with dragonflies and massive butterflies interrupting our view. We crossed a bridge overlooking a river dotted with villages, kids splashing in the waters, and randomly shaped boats being driven up the river. These boats were once bombs, the shells had been found in the countryside, cut in
half and used as workable boats! Very nifty! We had lunch at a local truck stop, and had our first taste of Laotian cuisine. Over the past 2 months I have tried much local food and loved every bit of it, so it’s sad to say Laotian food did nothing for me. In fact, I often found it hard to empty my plate! I tried Laap, the most common meal in Laos, spiced minced meat and sticky rice. Using your hands, you roll a small handful of sticky rice into a ball, attempt to pick up some meat with it, and eat. Not very appetizing!
Vientiane is a really small town for a capital city, so we only spent 1 full day there, saw a few temples and had a decent shop at the local market. We then headed for Vang Vieng, a place famous for tubes, buckets, drunken backpackers, the “In the Tubing” T shirt seen on every second person (including me!) and Friends the TV show, which they played at every single bar and restaurant every hour of every day. Our bus ride to Vang Vieng was full with backpacking westerners, all under the age of 30,
and all keen to jump into the Mekong River with a tube. A small stretch of the Mekong has been designated for tourists like us, with 10 or so different bars right alongside the river, dragging tubers inside for a drunken (and wet) party. As soon as we got to Vang Vieng we took a tuk tuk to the beginning of the tubing bars, and decided that instead of tubing today, we would just walk (stumble) from one bar to the next. We found a free spot in the mash of other drunken travellers on the bar balcony, and got ourselves a few rounds of buckets to kick off an awesome afternoon. A couple of guys we had met on the bus found us and joined in while we watched others jump on a swing off a massive tree than saw them fly into the river. It was hilarious to watch, some would do crazy backflips and somersaults, some did chin ups to show off their muscles to the crowd, others would be epic failures and fall off the swing moments after they had jumped off the platform. I knew I would fall into the latter category, so quietly sipped
my vodka redbull bucket in the hope that no one would coerce me into doing it. We headed onwards to a different bar, by this time I was onto my 5th bucket, and much of the rest of the afternoon I don’t remember. Between memory lapses, I do remember losing my group, and finding a different group of people who I decided were my new best friends, and joined them in a game of mud volleyball. I couldn’t stand up let alone move to hit the ball so I left, forgot all about my ‘new best friends’ and decided to find my actual friends! I found them playing tug of war in the mud, was quickly pushed into the mud pool by James, and spent about 20 minutes trying to get back out of the pool because I couldn’t co-ordinate my hands and feet to work together. Later on that evening we walked through rice paddies to get back home, and apparently I fell over no less than 20 times, even on flat surfaces, and ended up with multiple cuts and bruises to prove it. I have never been so drunk or hungover in my life, the next day Jade
and I woke at 1pm, missed the caves and village walk (naturally) so we spent the day doing nothing. The following day was meant to be tubing day, but I was still recovering and was so not up for another drunken episode, so I hired a bike and cycled across the river and saw the other side of Vang Vieng. Beautiful mountains, lush green rice paddies, buffalo and cows dragging carts along the dirt roads, and children playing in the puddles! I saw multiple signs saying that the caves were at the end of the road, and I had the full intention of seeing them, until I cycled passed Ian, one of our bucket buddies who told me the caves were still about 15 kms away. So I turned around and went back home! Fail.
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