Tha kaek

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Made it to Tha Kaek. This city is not at all what I'd expected....here I find myself in a Vietnamese guesthouse which turned out to be a brothel. I should've done a better job looking around for a decent place, but its not easy to do such things after a 9 hour bus ride in this heat. There were two young lady, a young man and his 3-4 years old daughter. They were nice people. They offered me dinner, which I accepted without hesitation. They also offered me other "accommodations." What is a man to do?!? They were very normal people. It surprised me how casual they lived their life. In the morning, one of the girls lit incense on the front porch to ask the spirits for good luck. I never thought people who ran brothel can be spiritual. It caught me off guard and changed my perception of people in the skin business.



A watermelon fest!


"What did I get myself into now?!? I'm fighting my hardest to say no, but temptations are everywhere.... Its extremely difficult being alone on the road as well...No one has ever won the battle against loneliness..."
Journal Entry: 03.19.2014
"Today, I've lost the urge to travel any longer...Something about this brothel that pulls me back. Against my better judgment, I've decided to stay one more night. Thakkaek is filled with Vietnamese...I wonder why?
I gave in...I can't even explain the emotions going thru my body....What is done is done. I made a decision. I'll live with the consequences. No worries."
Journal Entry: 03.20.2014

Literally a ghost town.


"I am aware of how I settle for things due to fear of rejection, disappointment and criticism. I couldn't the woman I wanted...I'm a leaf in the wind. Timid and easily dictated by the course of the wind. I'm a creature of comfort and I prefer the comfort over discomfort. I've realized my chances of changing who I am are quite small. Therefore, I will work on accepting who I am and move forward with life. I've found myself clinging onto every city that I've been to, not wanting to leave however unpleasant it may be. I can't imagine how these working girls feel. Having to sleep with strange men at any given time for a living... I wonder how they learned to cope and deal with it. Today, I've dealt with the remorse of last night. After being around so many Westerners, I've become aware of how timidly passive I can be in getting what I want and need. Am I too nice for this world...I wonder if I'll ever adapt...?"
Journal Entry: 03.21.2014

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