Orientation in Okazaki

---

John Timothy and I are now sharing this journal, so here goes:

It's going on 11 in the morning and I'm just sitting in my room, drinking hot vending machine coffee and studying for my test tomorrow. I feel like musing InsertCredit style at this point, not about Korean Church Services or that time in college we played golf down the hall way, but the more serious, point-and-click style of musings which seem to echo, so poignantly, from the heart of a man embracing the horizon. And now that I have won the noble prize for literature, let's talk about culture shock.

There is A LOT J-Tim and I didn't know about Japan and very, very gradually, our ignorance is dawning on us in MASSIVE waves. This is not like going to France, or some other European country where they simply do things the quaint, cultured way. This is like being transported into a what-if scenario of our time, in which the Smerfs never existed and children instead grew up watching blind men beg umbrellas from giant, omniscient blue dogs. In otherwords, it's crazy!

Sure, when you come to Japan you know about the bowing. You know about the 'Ohaiyo gozaimashita's and the 'Sumimasen's. Maybe you bought a cute little travel book and even know about how to identify 'genkan's, but let's be straight up honest here and say that is like flying over Africa and saying you've lived in poverty. Put quite simply, there are layers of etiquitte buried here which are seemingly impossible to understand.

Take, for example, a Japanese arcade. Here, of all places, one imagines that etiquette would both not matter, and if it did would confirm to the universal rules enforced by comraderie, by the esprit de corps, shared across all geo-political bounds by decades of joyous, united gaming. But it's not like that. You are NOT allowed to play against other people. It's perfectly all right to watch someone play a video game, but to play against them is like initiating a Kill Bill sake-house style duel for honor. Wait - did I just say it's ok to watch someone play a video game? That's not quite right either. SOMETIMES it's ok. How do you know? Well, that as yet remains a mystery. So far I am operating on the "if-someone-else-is-watching" appraoch, but who knows for sure.

What about eating? Take out restaurants are everywhere, so surely it is ok to take your food out, right? NOOOOOO!!!!!!! NOT THE BLUE WIRE!!!!!!!!! This is the sort of reaction that is likely to occur if you try to eat your food anywhere but in a place that is both invisible and secret, like the dark corners of your heart.

Or say you walk into a gift shop, so they give you a fan to cool off. While you're there you buy a drink. QUICK AS FAST AS YOU CAN LET THEM OPEN THE DRINK FOR YOU AND KEEP THE FAN. FOR GOD'S SAKE KEEP THE FAN. TAKE IT WITH YOU. Otherwise a man will follow you with maps and fans for hours, begging for them to be taken and asking questions like "Shyushin wa doko desu ka?" This is the way of things, and you must learn to accept them.

Now, this is all kind of daily stuff. But what about something really dangerous. What about something where thousands of years of time's grand stream have gradually shaped the cliffs of culture, eroded them, into some beautiful and sacred natural wonder. What about a situation where you CAN'T get it wrong, an error like striking the liberty bell with a gong and then being confused why you policemen are arresting you. What about a tea ceremony.

Ah, the tea ceremony. Nothing can prepare you for the world of tea, in fact, not even knowing the word for tea can actually warn you when you may have, bambi-like, accidentally stumbled into some heatless, Walt Disney animator's plan. Yes, tea ceremonies are deceptive, the James Bonds of the beverage world, and like James Bond things can only end with a frightening, aweing action sequence in which someone WILL MOST CERTAINLY not be getting cast in the sequel. Except no sex.

John Timothy and I accidentally stumbled into a tea ceremony. It was very good, not bad, but good in the sense of having played Russian Roulette and been the last man standing, sorrounded by a pile of bodies and blood money. In the beginning they give you Omogashi, a round little white ball with a delicious paste in the middle, and challenge you to eat it only using a twig. Do you pick it up with the twig? NO USE YOUR HANDS. IF YOU EVEN TOUCH THAT TWIG TO YOUR MOUTH THEN TEN THOUSAND NINJAS WILL APPEAR AND BRING FORTH THE REIGN OF CHAOS.

Thankfully we were in a basic, intro tea ceremony, so the tea came next, already brewed, with little turning of cups involved. Now you study the lacquer ware, remark on the beauty and color of the tea, which is in fact stunningly beautiful, frothing and an incredibly deep green in hue, a color one could only imagine the soul of a pious forest spirit glowing. Time passes, you negotiate smaller, more intricate cultural gaps, and now comes the nightmare question, the question that not even John Timothy, who had been through a full and complete tea ceremony before, who had already ventured into the depths of the labrynth to free his beloved and was allowed to keep both his experience and equipment for the sequel, not even John Timothy knew the answer to the next question - were we done?

And so we waited. There were many sounds - people performing calligraphy in the next room, cups clinking, yet no one came. But we couldn't just leave you see. There was something that needed to be done. Wait for them to return? But they are not coming, this next step is entirely on you, Simba, only you can avenge your father's death and save the Pride Lands. Do you bring the cups and lacquer ware up to them? NO GOD NO THIS IS A SIGN OF DISRESPECT WHAT THEY CAN'T CLEAN THEMSELVES THEY ARE SUCH BAD HOSTS YOU HAVE TO LOOK AFTER THEM NO PLEASE NO DON'T PICK UP ANYTHING. Do you go talk to them? Do you remark on the beautiful stone gardens in awed tones until your very reverence invites salvation? We simply did not know. In the end, we choose a desperate gambit. Carefully, we squared away our places, the tea bowl neatly centered, the the lacquer ware resting quietly, the eerily beautiful twig, now carefully studied in long moments of awkward silence revealing the most stunningly delicate whittling, all the different colors of the bark showing through the cut, even the pale white of the inner sappling it might have become shining through, yes, we placed that nicely at a beautiful diagonal. Then we ran. What else could we do? If going to an arcade is beyond us, then surely a tea ceremony is like unto the Collosus of Sardia - only approachable in legend.

So, this is what Japan is like. So much of it is identical, and then you come across a mysteriously open temple door and most negotiate the twin mystery of unused laddles by a dragon themed water font and the child care day center, coyly staring out over a sea of prayer strips and age.

---

Comments

[avi]

ladies?
no comments on schoolgirls william?

[Cha Cha]

What fun!
Your exposure to this culture is fascinating to read. Is it not possible to make friends with any Japanese so that they can introduce you to thier customs? Now who is Shin? What are the stores like? It seems you have zeroed in on the arcades, but what are the shops like? Do they have antique stores, book stores,clothing stores, stores to buy pots and pans? John you and Willima aren't roommates? We celebrated the fourth inside due to the nasty mosquitoes and no-seeums poised for immediate attack once opening the door and foolishly trying to walk outside to watch the fireworks. LOve, C

[FD]

blogs
I like blogs that are updated at least once a week

[Pat]

hear hear
Yes, what about the schoolgirls? And the sake? And the ninjas?