Hanging with Hare Krishnas, Partying with Punjabis

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Namaskaar!!

We left Agra on a really, really high note, having found out that I have an interview at the Northern Ontario School of Medicine at the end of March – I immediately threw up some big prayers and thank yous to the gods and goddesses for the opportunity, so here is hoping that it goes well! We got on a train to Mathura, which is the birthplace of the Lord Krishna (I have spent the majority of my time in India visiting temples dedicated to Shiva in all his various forms and his female consorts, and so figured one of the other gods was deserving of my time) and then went to Vrindavan, home of the International Society for Krishna Consciousness (ISKCON), and which is also the place where Krishna grew up. From what I can gather, Krishna is a lot like Jesus, in that he is the incarnate form of the god Vishnu (who, incidentally, is the god I am supposed to be worshipping based on horoscopes Mom and I had made in Jaipur), but instead of raising people from the dead and feeding lots of people on just a couple fish and pieces of bread like Jesus, Krishna stole and ate a bunch of butter when he was a baby and also stole clothing from a bunch of milkmaids who were bathing in the river. I mean, maybe Krishna did other nice miracles, but what he is most famous for is being a bit of a ladies man and getting up to fun pranks, and I can't think of better reasons than those to found a spiritual movement.

ISKCON and its members are better known as the Hare Krishna movement. The ISKCON temple in Vrindavan is this wide open, marble space with three different shrines, all featuring difference images of Krishna and Radha (Radha being his favourite girlfriend – their love story is legendary) and all adorned with flowers. There is a small group of people who sit on the floor playing drums, cymbals and harmonium, chanting “Hare Krishna, Hare Krishna, Krishna Krishna, Hare Hare!” over and over again – actually they hold a world record for the longest continual kirtan, or devotional singing, as they have been going non-stop for the last 25 years or so! Amazing. At certain times of day, devotees come to throw flower petals all over the place and dance and jump and chant and sing along with the musicians on the floor and the atmosphere is just infectious and wild and it is totally understandable why so many people are a part of this movement; rather than other temples I have seen, where the mood is very solemn and serious and holy, the ISKCON temple seems to be in a perpetual state of ecstasy and celebration and it was really an incredible experience to be swept up in it – at the evening aarti, or offering ceremony, a teenage girl grabbed me and started spinning with me around and around in a circle (men and women were on separate sides of the room) while the drummers beat away in an ever-increasing cadence and the atmosphere reached a fever pitch as the doors that were covering the images of Krishna and Radha were opened and everyone got a glimpse of the deities. We grabbed more people and started dancing in a circle again, twirling and waving our arms around. I have no clue if I was doing it right, but it was SUCH an unbelievable feeling to be carried away with such joy and happiness!

Afterwards, we met the girl's family, grandmothers and all, and got a bunch of hugs (and obviously a bunch of photos taken). We ate an absolutely delicious dinner at the ISKCON ashram's restaurant, with really yummy beet soup and homemade bread and cake which was an awesome treat! I then checked my email and found out that I have a second medical school interview at Queen's University, which I never, ever in a million years thought I would get (I am sorry this part is not exactly about India, but to be fair it is still part of my experience here), so I went back to the temple and gave even more prayers of thanks that this is happening for me right now. Mom was pretty much beside herself, and I am still sort of wrapping my mind around it!

We got to Delhi and I don't know how many times I can say that I felt like I was coming home, but I did really feel that way pulling into Pahar Ganj, my old hood. We got to Hotel Relax where I lived for 2 months and found that it had been overtaken by Jordanian businessmen (or smuggles, I couldn't figure out exactly what their “business” entailed), but luckily they had a room available for us which was very kind of them. We went to my favourite restaurant for lunch, where the man who, every day for 2 months, would implore me to please “give me your eyes”, and had lunch (he was disappointed to find that I still did not want to give him my eyes, even if we traded) before I set off on the mission that brought us to Delhi – finding Kamal and his family, the one I spent Diwali with, to see if I had arrived in time for his son's marriage.

Typically for me, I had no contact information for them, nor did I have their last name, and I only had a vague idea about where their home was because I only went there once, and it was dark, and Diwali, so there were lots of fireworks going off, and I was kind of drunk, and things tend to look differently in the daylight, when it's not Diwali, and sober, and the invitation to Sonu's wedding had come on Diwali night, so I wasn't actually even 100% certain of the date, but I was pretty sure it was January 29. I knew where their shop was, though, and Kamal's name, and when I went there and found it closed I took Mom wandering through the back alleys of Pahar Ganj (if you have ever been to Pahar Ganj, you know what a daunting experience that is for the first time!) to try to find his place. We never did end up finding it so I called it a day and decided to go back the following morning and try again. Thank God I did, because the neighbouring shop owners tracked down Monu (or Abhishek – I think Monu is a nickname for little brother or something like that), Sonu's brother, who was super excited to see that I had returned for Sonu's marriage. He took us to their home (and for the record, it was in the general direction I had been wandering in, but we turned right one alleyway too soon) and Minni (his wife), Kamal and Sonu were all there with huge smiles to greet us.

What happened next is something that now, for me, is totally normal, but took Mom aback a little bit because it is so NOT what would ever happen in Canada. We were invited to sit on Minni and Kamal's bed, where Sonu was lounging around, and where there was also a toddler being fed and a baby being changed and nursed (in India, weddings tend to bring in extended family from all over the place and they all crash out in the family home), and were brought chai, and samosas and snacks, and the family dog Lucy to play with, and were just chatting with everyone and catching up on news. I mean, in Canada, if some random strangers showed up on the morning of the groom's wedding and crawled in bed with him, they would probably be told politely that “Now is not a good time” and be asked to leave, or at least come back later. Not here though! After we finished eating some puja for the groom started, and Sonu was sat down on the floor and was blessed with a bunch of different things – I think something like 10 people have to perform the blessing, so again, luckily I was included, and I took a handful of dry grass in each hand, pressing them into little bowls of turmeric, red kumkum, oil, and some other stuff (no idea) before then pressing them on his feet, hands, knees, shoulders and forehead, 7 different times, while his aunts sang songs around us and everyone laughed. A bunch of his friends who I had met at Diwali came by to see and were clapping and chanting right along with everyone else – it was really fun even though I had and still have no idea what was going on!

Mom and I left to go shopping for something for her to wear that night, and met them later on that night for the final blessing by the local priest before we went to the banquet hall to meet the bride. This entailed a bus ride on possibly the bumpiest road I have been on since Africa, wayyyyy into the west (I think) of Delhi with a bunch of drunk and rowdy 20-something guys and a bunch of outspoken and hilarious older women – a very, very entertaining ride ensued before we all hopped off about a kilometre from the venue so we could be joined by a marching band and a bunch of drummers, dancing and singing and marching our way to the hall (I should also mention that fireworks were going off the entire time, and in fact some thoughtful individual put a box of lit fireworks in the middle of the road, creating a wall of impassable danger that we barely made it through alive!). This wedding was unique in that, first of all, I had some connection with the family beyond meeting them once, and second, in that men and women were all dancing and partying together – before, I had only been at marriages where they're all kept separately so this was a lot more fun and inclusive for me and I had tons of fun dancing with all of Sonu and Monu's friends (and I am getting REALLY good at the Punjabi-shoulder-bounce, index-fingers-in-the-air dance) and with Minni and all the aunts. When we finally reached the banquet hall, it was packed full and there was an OPEN BAR (another thing I had yet to see at an Indian marriage – I think it was Kamal's influence, based on my experience with him at Diwali!) and tons of little food stalls set up serving all kinds of different things, as well as men coming around with hors d'oeuvres. The DJ was playing a rotation of about 10 different songs, and I swear I heard the same one 6 times over the course of the night, but no one seemed to care as at the beginning of the song an equal amount of enthusiasm greeted the opening notes! There was more dancing, more laughing, lots of eating, until finally the bride showed up, and holy shit.

If I ever in my life manage to look even a fraction of as beautiful as Sonu's wife looked at her marriage, it will be a miracle. She was wearing a gorgeous dark purple sari covered in beading and dripping with gold. And the best part is, because it is a love marriage, they both looked so, so, so happy as she approached the stage and Sonu held out his hand to her. She climbed up and Kamal busted open a bottle of champagne over them, their friends erupted in screams and shouts of happiness, and another dance party started onstage with the bride and groom. Absolute joyful mayhem.

We all took a bunch of pictures and I wanted to take this opportunity to tell the Germans, Wolle and Joern and Sebastian, if you wonderful men are reading this, I thought about you the whole time and you were in my heart that night! I know you would have loved to have been there and if it weren't for you I never would have met Kamal and his family so thank you 😊 I love you all and miss you very much!

It was a very very late night, but one that was so much fun and so unforgettable, and I am really happy I got to bring Mom with me and have her experience the most beautiful, fun and amazing Indian marriage I have ever been to, and to see how a wedding is thrown down on this side of the globe! We are exhausted now but cannot rest because there is still so much more of this diverse, colourful and delicious country to see 😊



Namaste and much spicy love, friends and family!!



Shannon xoxoxo

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Photos

Krishna and Radha
The reason ISKCON exists

Hare Krishna!
A devotee

Neverending Kirtan
They have been singing Hare Krishna for 26 years now!

Blessing Sonu
Which was amazing fun!

Turmeric Rubdown
Aaaaand then we turned him into an Oompa-Loompa

Marching Band Dance Party
Minni loving life!

Chariot Dance Party!
Then this happened, on top of a horse-drawn chariot.

New boyfriends
Seriously, I am now in the market for a Punjabi husband.

The Happy Couple
The best, best, BEST Indian marriage I have ever witnessed :)