Attachment article

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I found this very interesting - and confronting - article on a mother's experience of her adopted daughter's struggle with attachment and the significant lengths she went to to address it: http://www.baas.org/news_special.php

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Comments

[Lisa G]

Don't scare yourself - parenting is hard enough!
As a friend of Caroline's, and the mother of two (now 18 and 16), I can say: Simply wait and see. Biological children can have attachment issues with their mother, too - as I know. Sometimes, regardless of the origin, the personalities of mother and child may clash. This doesn't mean that a loving, nurturing relationship can't develop and grow - but it does mean that 'expectations' may need to be modified constantly. My two were extremely different as babies: the first girl was detached, independent, preferring the father, ratty, infuriating yet an absolute doll with carers. The second boy was touchingly affectionate, thoughtful of others, appreciative, cuddly - an angel. There were no physical, medical, or psychological issues to hang my hat on... I just had to treat them as two different people, be a loving mother and do my best. Now they are both caring mature, polite, considerate, well-balanced.... painfully, infuriatingly, moody teenagers! No child will start out, or end up as 'perfect'. Parenting is actually a job where 'feeling like you're failing' is the best indicator towards future success. Enjoy the ride ... there will be ups and downs, but it's worth it!

[Looking for the Pony]

Parenting advice
Very true, Lise. Thanks for making me feel better!