Wo mi lu le!

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…..not being good at remembering names is a poor qualification for someone who will have 5 classes of 30+ kids to teach next week. I am struggling to remember the names of my colleagues, the “International teachers” as we are known. I'll be getting photos in due course but for now there's Peter, (Australia), Joel & Chelbee, an African-American couple from Virginia, USA, Erin, from Syracuse, New York, Kyle, (Canada), Matt, Nelson, Patrick & Corey, (USA) also another couple, Kelly & Elizabeth from Montana. Alex is from Manchester, UK, though I don't think you'd pick it from his accent. Laura's also from the Old Dart. There are a few others too. Lauren, (Canada), Gyu & Halim, a couple from Indonesia, then, in administration, Cathy from Winnipeg, Canada, plus local ladies, Angel & Rainy (not their original names I suspect)..... English English could be hard to promote here. There is no official school policy on which version to teach, it's up to us so, sorry, it will be 'colour' & 'manoeuvre' in my class. I'm not expecting to get to 'manoeuvre' with the Grade 3s.....

…..the locks are the first real brush with cheap hardware that make you realise how much stress good quality equipment can save. Out of the 4 keys I have been given, for my quarters, the storeroom/laundry downstairs, the International teachers' staff room & resource rooms none fit first time & it has taken me 2 days to get the right key first time for the front door.....

…..I am listening to a lot of Chinese. The teachers at the school are mainly Chinese & live in the 3 to 5 storey dormitory blocks with their families. While we are happy to accept the units as single quarters (even the couples Joel & Chelbee & Kelly & Elizabeth get a unit each) most westerners would baulk at living in these rooms with children too.....

…..Ding-Dong. I must get a photo of one of my neighbours from across the block. He's very capricious. Sometimes he'll wave, say hello or ask for a “high 5” which reminds me I must teach him to say “G'day” and introduce some Australian culture to the place. At other times Ding Dong is pretty surly & once even threatened me with a stick as I went up the stairs. Still, he is only about 4 years old so he's probably just going through a phase.....


…..I tried to use my Aussie cash passport (debit card) at the RT mart in Yangzhou. I discovered that in China a 6 digit pin number is required. As I had only been issued with 4 all my good work making myself understood in Chinese came to naught at the payment counter, even after I'd rooted around to find the (4 digit) number.....

…..There's a big, (around 10m diameter), Sinocentric map of the world as you get onto the school grounds from the driveway. If you are used to our conventional, western oriented maps of the world it does look a little odd. Still China's own name for itself, Zhong guo, simply means “Middle Country” The map appeared to take the best part of a week to be scrubbed clean for the school opening parade on Monday morning, 7am. It was called off due to rain & postponed until Tuesday......

…..A bizarre collection of vehicles on the streets. Virtually no cyclist or electric bike rider & not that many motorcyclists wear helmets. Female passengers on bikes & scooters often ride sidesaddle. Loads are often stacked in blatant defiance of Newton's laws of physics.....

…..Bus to town Y1 (that's 1 Yuan, which is around 20c Australian). Like all other vehicles here it appears the horn switch is wired so that, occasionally, you press it to turn it off. All manner of weird & wonderful electric bikes & scooters. Almost every one seems to be a different design.....

…..Off to the School Store, a shop just under the school's Sports Stadium, to see what they have & maybe get some basic provisions. Cereal would be good for breakfast. They do have some sugary processed stuff in a box in the Western dining room & Kellogs Corn Flakes, a cruel bit of marketing to put 2 “Ls” in the middle of a product sold in China, but predominantly it's eggs, bacon & sausages style fare, every day. As I am avoiding pork & related products that leaves me with the eggs. We can, & do, eat in the Chinese canteen, which is open more often, at weekends for instance. However the food for the masses (& there are masses of people here) is NOT the cuisine you'd find in a restaurant. I am growing accustomed to the Chinese practice of chopping chickens into portions which, for instance, sometimes leave the feet still attached to the legs....

…..Laura, English, speaks Chinese well (studied it for 4 years) is told by experienced teacher, now administrator, Cathy, that children will find her fascinating because of her blonde hair. They might want to come & touch it. She's teaching younger kids & thinks how cute that will be. Cathy continues, “there's no soap in the toilets. They put some in there once but it was all gone in a couple of days. Winter is the worst time. They all come in with snotty noses & nothing to wipe them on.....” I should check to see whether Laura found the baseball bat.....

…..Ha Ha, the joke's on me! The same applies to beards! I'm tall so they can't reach but if I have to get down to their level to sort out an issue the impulse to touch a foreign beard is irresistable. They are also fascinated by hair on the arms of foreign teachers, well, the male ones anyway, & will often sneak up from behind to pinch the “fur”.....

…..I miss the Australian birds, the cockatoos, lorikeets, rosellas, kookaburras
& honeyeaters. I have been keeping my eyes open round here though. There is an interesting bird that hangs around the little footbridge near the water but won't let me get too close. The underside of the wings pure white when in flight, a sort of mottled light brown & white in repose. I also caught a glimpse of what I think is a Hoopoe, a bit smaller than a kookaaburra with a yellowish crest that folds back, in profile a little like a baseball cap put on backwards....

…..first sunset in Yangzhou. Until now, a week into my visit, there's been too much smog haze to see the sun most of the time......

…..”Wo mi lu le” was the title of one of the .mp3 Chinese lessons from the Internet which I had been using before I came to China. It was a very useful phrase tonight. For some unaccountable reason, having always kept 3 or 4 pairs of reading glasses in strategic locations in the study, car glovebox, work etc. I only brought one pair with me. I think the logic was that, as I only buy the cheap Chinese ones anyway, as I usually lose them, it would be pointless to buy them in Australia then reimport them. So, to replace the set I broke a couple of days ago I decide to repeat the bus journey I took with a few other teachers on Saturday & go to the RT supermarket in Yangzhou city, where the shops are open until 10pm most nights, & simply buy another pair. Even factoring in a bus fare of ¥1 (about Au20c each way), it looks like a cheap & easy option. On the way there I get off the bus too early, before the bus turns right, then left again opposite the RT Mart. About 6.30pm, starting to get dark & the traffic as crazy as usual I stuck to the footpath as far as possible & kept walking in the same direction the bus had been heading. It soon becomes clear I am nowhere near RT so I started looking for a shop that might sell reading glasses. Having found a pokey little shop below a large building that seems to sell lots of different things I thought I'd try my luck. After excusing my poor Chinese (always a good start however obvious it might be, the equivalent of a Chinese person in the west saying, “me no speakee Eenglish very good”) I manage to convey with words & signs that I need glasses to “kan shu” (literally: read book). Having found a pair of the correct magnification, (2, remember that, it's important), I decide to go for broke & ask for a spare pair. This, approximately, is the conversation (mostly) translated back to standard English.....

…..D: “Very good. I want 2” Shop Assistant: “These ones are 2”. D: “Yes, very good but I want 2” (thinking, I wish I knew the word for a pair of glasses). SA: (helpfully) “Try these - 2.5” D: “No, these good. Want 2”. SA: “These 2?!” D: (putting the chosen pair aside in a grand gesture), “this good - one. Want - one” (pointing at the empty space nearby & wishing I knew the word for “another”). SA: “Ah! Liang ge” (which means 2 of something). D: (excitedly), “Dui, Dui” (“Correct, correct”, the Chinese having no direct word for “Yes”). The second pair are too expensive at ¥50 or about Au8, (I'm bound to lose them) so in the end I walk out with one pair of Au$3 glasses, no cheaper than I could have bought them with far less bother from Hong Kong Hardware in Adelaide, but tolerably satisfied with my efforts.

…..I brave the sea of honking cars & buses plus hundreds of bikes, electric & pedal powered, scooters, mostly with helmetless riders & some with passengers, astride or sidesaddle. A few bikes have lights but the rest take their chance. The place is full of little hole in the wall businesses doing - well - stuff! I can't read the signs & the activities in these little places are usually totally inscrutable. I have no idea what is going on but there is a definite impression of being BUSY.....

…..I finally get to a 32 bus stop & head back to the school. The easy part. Unless, in the dark, you get off a couple of stops too early then get lost among the pitch black streets of outer Yangzhou. I finally ask a couple outside a block of units which way to the school but don't know the full title in Chinese (The Beijing New Oriental Foreign Language School). Luckily I have it written down in Chinese characters. A sizeable group standing outside the unit are very helpful & I manage to gather that it is about 20 minutes “Zou lu” (on foot) & turn left at the lights & go straight ahead. When “straight ahead finally leads to a pitch black path along the canal I pause. As if by magic a police car with lights flashing slowly approaches, possibly on the lookout for a crazy foreigner who might be an axe murderer roaming the streets of the city. I flag them down with,“Wo mi lu le” (I am lost). I suspect from the gesture the reply is, “ 'op in”. They drive me to the school, not that far away but a good 20 minutes walk. I excuse my poor Chinese again all the way there but the cop leaves me with, “Is OK, you are a myee friend”.....

…..Medical Examination today, on the other side of Yangzhou. Rainy has organised a driver & we head off into the traffic by 8.30am. Due to a mix up in timetables it means that Gyu will have to take 3/10 - THAT class.....

…..through the bizarre mixture of old & new architecture & modes of transport that characterise China we arrive at a modern but somehow slightly seedy looking Medical Centre (in fact, Center).It must be doubly confusing for Chinese students to not only learn a totally illogical & largely non-phonetic system of spelling & also have to deal with the fact that the USA has decided to tinker around the edges & added another level of chaos. I vote for “Senter”, now that would make more sense.....

…..I am led through a series of rooms to be inspected by a range of disinterested doctors whose only emotion seems a mild irritation at my taking up their time also the fact that I don't immediately understand what they are asking me to do. The electrical clamps on my left arm & leg are especially worrying but the expected 15000 Volts don't materialise.....

…..The urine sample is probably the furthest removed from Australian or other Western practice. You are presented with a tiny, clear plastic cup, only a few ml., & asked to provide the sample. I begin to feel I am a nuisance for wasting time by taking it to the toilet but do anyway & I notice the young Chinese man in at the same time does the same. The procedure is then to walk back, through the foyer holding your golden prize & taking care not to spill any. After presenting this to the (female) doctor she proceeds to carry out whatever tests are required. I wander off to see if Rainy has called the driver to go back to the school. I am called back by a quite irritated doctor & the young man indicates that we are both expected to dispose of the samples ourselves after the testing. I follow him back whence it had been produced but he takes a detour in the foyer & deposits it in a red (lined !) bin just inside the front door. I am pronounced healthy (but probably a bit slow).....

…..one of the brighter students in Class 3/6 says, on this humid, close & sticky day, & struggling very hard to make himself understood, “Teacher, teacher, you must go to mirror”. “What !!” is my immediate response, then, “Please sit down”. He persists. His English is much better than the others in the class but still very basic. He repeats the request. Intrigued by now I can only ask, “Why?”. “Your face.....”, (he brushes his cheek with his hand to indicate the chalk on my own).....

…..another great feed at the “Restaurant Across the Road”. (Note: I must find out what it's called). Erin's birthday, Erin, the goil from Noo Joisey (or as we in English speaking countries know it, New Jersey). She turned 28, exactly half my age. Surely not half? I could drown my sorrows with drink but I'd be drowned before I got drunk, the beer is so weak. Tsingtao, Snow Beer, maybe there is something stronger than lolly-water but I haven't found it yet. Anyway, I can live with being the oldest International teacher - someone has to do it. A motion is proposed & passed unanimously that the proprietor of the restaurant should be appointed Head of Catering at the school....

…..I finally go to the China Bank in Yangzhou after Staff Meeting at one o'clock. Friday afternoon. Cathy is heading into town to get some shoes so helpfully gives me a few pointers to get to the bank, the Electronics Mart (to look for a tripod for my camera) & the RT Mart. A grey haired Chinese woman gets on carrying a little girl of about 3. She calls out to one of the other passengers who produces a waste bin, which looks like a 10 litre plastic paint container. She proceeds to remove the little girl's pants so that she can pee in the bin. Despite the size of the bin her aim is not good & most ends up on the floor or on the woman's shoes. She laughs it off, so to speak, & asks someone to put the bin back. These are times when I know NO Chinese.....

…..having been given directions to the Bank of China it proves a painless experience. I find a teller who speaks passable English (much better than my impassable Chinese) & I retrieve some money & check the balance on the card.....

…..buying a tripod would be easy IF I had been looking for a standard piece of equipment but no, I have to make life difficult for myself & the hapless young girl in the camera section of the Electronics Mart who set herself up by indicating that she speaks a little (very little) English. Having shown me a couple of tripods I try to explain that they are very good but I am actually looking for one with flexible legs. I've seen them in Australia. The legs are a type of stiff, plastic covered spring that can be twisted around conveniently placed posts, rails, tree branches etc & are much lighter & more portable than a standard tripod. Try saying that in Mandarin. A few hand gestures & rough sketches convey a very vague idea of what a Gorilla Pod looks like. She promises to contact the school if she can locate one.....

…..at the Giant (the make, not the size) bike shop I have a quick check of prices. ¥600 would appear to be a reasonable price for a basic bike. It's very flat here so Kelly & Elizabeth bought single speed bikes. ¥600 is about Au$105 at today's exchange rate, for a brand new bike with a carrier & who knows, maybe even lights. With 27 speeds, suspension front & rear plus all the bells 'n' whistles you could pay up to ¥3000 or ¥4000 (around Au$500-700). I've been advised to buy a name brand like Giant as the cheaper Chinese ones might not last long.....

…..I decide, having not spotted it on the way back, to wait until Saturday to visit RT Mart & so stay on the bus heading for the school. The same grey haired woman with the same little girl get on the bus again. The same performance with the waste bin ensues & no, her aim is no better.....

…..Saturday morning. No classes. After a still, humid night it's a relief. I wonder how long this weather lasts before autumn sets in? I also wonder how I'll cope with the debilitating humidity when it's in the high 30s or even 40C.The seemingly constant haze just traps the heat & humidity. Barely a breath of wind a lot of the time. Walking around is reminiscent of trying to sleep on a warm night with a thick blanket on the bed. I can only imagine what it must be like in the tropical south, near the Pearl River delta around Guangzhou, Dongguan & Shenzhen with even more people, more factories & more pollution.....

…..my diet has been so different over the last week or so. After airline food I have been on largely School cafeteria food as outlined in other comments. I have very much missed yoghurt, fresh fruit & nuts. I found some packs of cereal in the Century Mart in town yesterday with some English labelling on the pack so bought some oatmeal & will probably go to get some yoghurt later today. Still I seem to be functioning reasonably well on rice (a staple in the cafeteria, I thought they might sometimes have noodles but haven't seen any yet), chicken, beans, (green & cooked dried beans), eggs, boiled in some sort of soy sauce concoction, tofu, some green vegetable matter which I have yet to accurately identify plus, now & then, boiled dumplings which I usually inspect for signs of pork before consuming but are sometimes sweet. Last night they offered spicy fish which was quite good apart from the small bones. I don't believe there's a word for “fillet” in Chinese. Peter ate with me last night & was disconcerted when he noticed the eye to find that he had the fish head. Waste not, want not! As I told him if fish is brain food just think what fish's brain will do for you.....

…..I bought a bike yesterday. Having been advised by “old hands” not to buy one of the really cheap local brands but to go to the Giant bike shop & get one of theirs. As I'd been in there during the week so felt confident about finding it again. I finally bought a black 3 speed quite basic model. With mudguards, front carrier basket, rear rack & helmet (possibly the only bike helmet on the street in Yangzhou & a subject of local interest) all up it cost ¥1150 or almost exactly Au$200. A bit extravagant but it should be worth something when I've finished with it & will open up all sorts of local travel possibilities.....

…..Cathy, the International Teachers administrator, is in town with Peter. I meet them near the Electronics Mart & she takes us both down a very interesting street in the older part of Yangzhou, full of interesting shops with all manner of beautifully made crafts & goods, plus food stalls, chaguan (tea houses), fruit & veg shops. Finally I buy some fresh fruit. Before I bid them goodbye & head for the bike shop I decide to shout them an ice cream. We all end up with a chocolate coated icecream on standard lolly stick, with a core of sweet red bean. Don't laugh, it's fantastic, as is the price. I sometimes still have difficulty hearing the correct price of things & think the girl behind the stall is saying, “Shi liu” (¥16). Mandarin being what it is the word for “10” & “is” are written with the same letters in Pinyin but pronounced slightly differently so it's not “sixteen yuan” but “is six yuan”. That's about Au$1.20 for 3 or 40c each. I'm going back for more.....

…..The standard greeting for the class is “Good morning class” & the response, “Good morning Teacher”. I have extended their knowledge of English to, “G'day class” & they can now respond with, “G'day Teacher.....

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