Last Thoughts from the Field

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Aaaaah! Mombasa! Elegant resort! What a way to end 3 months of work at the orphanage in Vihiga. I've been resting, reading, swimming and even getting a massage. I've signed up for a snorkeling adventure at a coral reef, transported there by dhow.
Here are my last thoughts about the experience at Vihiga. I think the sponsors from TJ will find this most interesting.
Sponsors: how often do you write your child? The children know the name of their sponsor and are eager to receive letters. Sponsors who seldom write don't understand how this is received by the child. Some of the children think of sponsors as their new parents...they daydream about meeting you. They recall details of your letters and pictures. You should see the look on their faces when they get a letter - and the disappointment of those who don't. Please write your child at least every few months. If they don't answer you promptly, it isn't because they don't want to. It is just that they may not have paper, stamps, or an adult organizing them to write.
Children here chop wood, carry water cans, haul cattle fodder, plant maize and perform chores not required by most USA children in recent history. They NEVER complain about working and NEVER have to be asked twice. In fact, when they see me carrying a heavy load, they offer to carry it for me! They turned out in the rain recently to cut eucalyptus poles when the building contractor needed wood for scaffolding.
Vihiga Children Home's soccer ("football" in Kenya) team RULES. Those boys can whip local teams from kilometers around. The girls are getting their team ("side" in Kenya) together and they are fantastic too. Of course the dance and drum team would win any child talent contest. I have the sports and dance on a one hour video, which also includes classroom footage and some orphan interviews.
A few observations on life as an orphan: Children here don't bring up the subject of their past or talk spontaneously about their parents. New residents show their feelings of separation through stomach aches or headaches - rarely tears. Other children act to make the new child part of a group. The newcomer meets kindness and friendship from his or her peers. Older children coming to VCH are focused on the aspect of a free secondary education. Word has gone out locally that orphans accepted at VCH will have that opportunity. The older children are so pleased to be at VCH.
In some ways VCH isn't too different from a Kenyan boarding school, and of course almost all secondary and some primary schools in Kenya are boarding schools. Many orphans go home to extended family in December, April and August for at least short visits. Those are the school vacation months here.
Orphans at VCH are not adoptable. Under Kenyan law or tradition, only infants surrendered at birth are adopted. Older children already have a family and tribal loyalties. It is felt that they would not adjust to another family.
No HIV testing has been done on the orphans. There is strong shame and denial surrounding this topic amont Kenyan adults - even the educated adults. People will conceal their HIV until it is full blown AIDS and many will die rather than to seek help. I wish I understood the HIV / AIDS aspect better.
Impetigo, scabies, ringworm and intestinal worms are considered natural to childhood and not aggressively treated or worried over by the adults. It is thought that as the children grow up, they will learn to take better care of their hygiene and these things will go away. My concern about these conditions (including crowding multiple children - even bedwetters- in one bed where skin disease can spread) astonished some teachers and caretakers.
Children here were not accustomed to the underwear that we brought. The smaller kids wore the same pair for a while and then threw them down the outhouse hole when they got dirty. They will need time to catch on. I've never seen underpants drying on the wash line....hmmmm. Mrs. Agesa says that by secondary school, the children will be required to wear underwear (at a boarding school). Children fourth grade and up do understand and wear underwear and are grateful to get it. Socks are definitely valued. Small boys should not be sent shorts with zippers because their penis can get caught or injured. Elastic waist shorts please.
Children didn't know about pajamas or nightgowns. Nightgowns are a better choice for the girls if you are thinking of sending any. Consider they use the outside squat toilets. Handkerchiefs would be so helpful. there is nowhere to blow one's nose except on a sleeve....no paper tissues are available here. Leaves and corncobs are their toilet paper. Corncobs make good scrub brushes for bathing ...the poor folks' loofah! The children really have no good place to wash their hands after using the toilet.
We should buy each child 2 large tubes of toothpaste a year - purchase by the case. One large tube costs about $1.75 retail here - not cheap because toothpaste has really started to catch on here in Kenya.
As I leave, I'm happy to know that all children now have towels, soap, vaseline for skin care, and trunks with locks. They are thrilled. We also purchased all the sheets and blankets for when they move into the new dorm. Wow!
Finally, the smaller children at VCH really need more nurturing to foster their emotional development. A few seem to be at risk for attachment disorders, although not the majority, thankfully. VCH doesn't have the kind of staff to child ratio to allow for nurturing. One female and one male caretaker for 80 plus children isn't sufficient. Cooking - over a wood fire in a shed - and endless laundry are their first priorities and that is exhausting work that consumes most of their day.
I'll soon be home. Thanks to all of you who have responded to this blog and sent me care packages and letters of support while I've been here. I wouldn't have missed this experience for the world. It's the hardest job you'll ever love (not sure who said that originally, but it's true of Vihiga Childrens Home).

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