Ethiopia...Addis first time and Bahar Dar

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Well, I'm not dead....yes I can hear the disappointed groans (from Fordy more than likely); I have just being very very lazy. So finally I am going to write this....oh god, nearly 30 days...this is going to cost me so much (internet is 25cents a minute which equates to....almost 1.5p). I am going to split this mammoth task into stages....Addis + Bahar Dar, Gondar + Addis, and Laibela, Axum, + (you guessed it) Addis; hopefully I will have all 3 done before I leave for Kenya...actually thats not very likely...but heres the first bit anyway. Pictures will follow when the internet isn't suicidally slow.
Well I left Cairo after getting fairly hammered the previous night at the incredibly expensive Grand Hyatt Hotel, with James, Marius, and the Aussie guy who's name I forget but who paid for it all (60quids worth of drinks) on his dads card....as all the bars ect were closed due to it being Mohammed's birthday...and apparently he wasn't big on the whole drinking thing. Cairo airport was surprisingly small for an airport supporting such a tourist dependent country; although their was a huge shopping mall right next door in case you hadn't bought enough tourist junk. Oh and actually it's not tourist dependent as some Egyptian we meet told us...it's Suez Canal and Cotton dependent....ripping tourists off is just a nice little earner on the side.
The Egypt Air flight was brilliant, a really good airline meal and 3 hours of talking to...well being talked at by...an expat Ethiopia who was telling me how brilliant Ethiopia is; so I ask him 'why don't you still live there then'...he answers 'because it's not very nice'...to be fair his English was fairly broken so he probably could have explained himself better if I spoke Amharic or French.
I will be honest arriving in Addis at 3am, driving into the dodgiest part of town (the piazza - according to my taxi driver), being told not to get out of the car whilst my burly taxi driver scared off the street kids surrounding the car with his fighting stick, and then finding out both hotels of choice were full literally scared the poo out of me....was it going to get better? Yes in fact, as I stayed at the Midi Pension on Bole road, which (whilst being expensive) was brilliant...I got my own bathroom and a tv that had supersport...so cricket highlights. Oh and there was a free box of condoms on the table...making me think, correctly as the nightly noises proved, that it was an upmarket brothel.
My first job in Addis was to stay awake from 3am till 8am and then get a taxi to the Kenyan Embassy and sort out my Kenyan Visa.....unfortunately I fell asleep...woke up at 11:30am and rushed out without changing to the street to hail down a cab; and after accepting the first ones (overcharging) fee I was on my way. I got there at 12:30, to see a sign telling me the Chancellery closed at 11am for all Visa applications...bollocks. However all was not lost, as after getting throughly frisked I went in anyway to inquire about what time they opened tomorrow and because they were clearly bored, having had very little visitors I imagine, they let me apply for my visa. So I left 50dollars down, but in the knowledge my visa would be ready the next day..and it was.
Addis itself is strange, very strange; it is the most unplanned city I have ever seen or been in...although I haven't been in in that many cities.....it has 3 centers, and to be honest if you look across it from a height it is just a sprawling shanty town with the occasional high rise popping up out of no where...it really is surreal. Brilliant though, as unexpectantly I am basically ignored....one white man in crowds of 100's of Ethiopians and I am ignored...it's quite nice really. My first two days in Ethiopia were spent wandering around Addis looking at the few sites this relatively modern city has to offer, and drinking coca at every cafe I saw as it was incredibly hot...and admiring all the strange monuments the Derg (military dictatorship under Mengistu from 70's to 80's) put up...some of them are really Soviet. The museums were, it pains me to say this, boring; generally as they had absolutely nothing of interest in them....the only interesting thing was Lucy (oldest human/semi human skeleton) and even that was just a plaster cast of the original. My most interesting experience was meeting Faisal the tout...who to be fair hooked me up with my minibus (for Ferengi price of 120 Birr) to Bahar Dar....who after treating me to a meal of Injera and Tibbs took me to a traditional Ethiopian festival. Thankfully my lonely planet warned me about this, and as if I didn't need more proof as I arrived an Italian guy (who had being chatted up by some gorgeous Ethiopian girls) was presented with the girls drinks bill of 1600 Birr (nearly 100quid); needless to say he went absolutely ape, and I left quickly. Apparently (as I spoke to him later in a restaurant) the girls ask 'do you invite me' and if you say yes that means they can order absolutely anything that they want and you have to pay.
After staying up and watching bad western movies, dubbed into Amharic, I sat outside waiting for my minibus; from 4am when it was meant to turn up, until 5am when it did. Oh well I was off, and apparently got the best seat on the minibus....although I disagreed as I was sat basically on top of the gear lever, which the driver (who looked 12) tended to use far to enthusiastically. Also I was sat next to an old man, who I am going to describe as a sack because every time I actually managed to fall asleep he thought it his job to poke me as hard as he could to wake me up...then smile at me and jabber something in Amharic. Needless to say I was very upset. Also I discovered the unfathomable African custom of, not matter how hot it gets outside and therefore worse inside the bus, never opening the windows or putting on the (it probably wouldn't work anyway) air conditioning lol The roads were mostly all tarmac/asphalt, apart from one bit...up and down the Blue Nile gorge; imagine driving down 2000ft then back up 2000ft on roads which resemble..well a dirt track with large rocks lol The views of the gorge were spectacular however...as were the views along most of the journey to be fair...a lot of burnt out old tanks from when the Derg was overthrown. I also got my first look of the Ethiopian countryside, which is beautiful and green...unbelievable that they have every suffered famines...actually after seeing their ridiculously antiquated farming methods it wasn't all that unbelievable. Apparently they only manage to harvest enough to survive...they could do so much more with a little more knowledge...but as they know that the West will pour food in if trouble brews they don't see the point in advancing their methods.
Finally, after a throughly uncomfortable but to be fair absolutely brilliant (my love of African transport began here) journey, I arrived in Bahar Dar.....the gateway to Lake Tana with its islands full of Monasteries and the famous Blue Nile Falls. I lugged Bob (my bag for those of you who don't know) to the Ghion Hotel, and checked into my 100Birr room....which to be fair is incredible considering the Hotels location in the middle of beautiful gardens right on the lake shore. Unfortunately I was far to tired to appreciate this, and collapsed into bed at 8pm....after arranging a boat trip on the lake...with a group of people I hadn't met...for 100Birr, from a scruffy fellow I thought was a tout..but who actually turned out to be the manager.
I awoke at 7-30, and scrambled to get dressed, as the boat trip was meant to leave at 8am....I just made it to the hotel reception in time...only to be told by the still under dressed manager that there was a problem and I would have to wait...but it wouldn't be long; so I went and sat in the restaurant, opposite a red headed girl. After an hour of waiting I built up the courage to go and chat to her...starting up with the brilliant first line of 'are you waiting for the boat trip as well'. Unknowingly I had sparked off what was to be the best time of my trip so far, and after it finished the hardest as well. Her name...Tatjana...a 22 year old German girl from Bayreuth University...who, after having done 6 weeks of research for her course (African Development) in the Southern Omo region of Ethiopia, was taking a break from her friends and traveling a bit by herself. We immediately clicked, and got chatting like old friends...and after less than 30minutes she told me she was coming to Gondar with me; just told me, which I didn't mind.
Another 2 hours waiting, and chatting, and we met a group of three from the American University in Cairo....Adrian (from Cambridge), Jess (from New York), and Dali (from Egypt/Texas), who were all great company. Finally we were told, by the swarmy manager, that the boat trip was delayed until 3pm....but luckily Tati and me got a free trip to the Blue Nile falls as compensation; with another two German girls. The trip was good fun; we hiked from the park entrance (not particularly hard or far) to the much reduced, due to the new Hydro Electric Dam, Blue Nile falls....which were still fairly amazing, as we all got soaked by the spray. The best bit happened on the way back...the driver pushed the poor old school land cruiser far to hard, and the engine died...meaning that we had to try and flag down any passing vehicle; eventually a public bus stopped and we all hopped on (paid for by the hotel...they are losing a lot of money on us). During the journey Tati and I had a friendly conversation (in her broken but good Amahric) with a local lady, who was carrying 2 (live) chickens who seemed very determined to escape her clutches and fly out of one of the open windows. Once back in Bahar Dar, Tati treated me to my first Spriss (a mixed fruit juice...avocado, papaya, mango, banana...everything and anything they have) which was amazing; and we then proceeded to be rushed towards the boat trip. Which would have being great I imagine, if Tati and myself hadn't being sat at the back...which meant that we wern't protected by the plastic at the front of the boat from the spray from the waves hitting the front of the boat...and because the water was very rough the spray was in fact the consistency of buckets of water..,.meaning we got soaked. The driver actually gave me a cup and told me to start bailing water at one point, when the level reached 1/2 to our knees lol In the end we only saw one monastery, where the priest had us all sit down around him whilst he showed us pictures from ancient goat skin book, it was brilliant like story time; then for his finale he got out an old tattered pink umbrella and stood posing with a massive smile on his face (clearly thinking stupid tourists love this) whilst he insisted we take pictures...he was a nice man. After another soaking on the way back we (Tati and me is going to become we from now on as it;s easier than writing Tati and me the amount of times I imagine I am) joined the 3 from AU in Cairo for dinner and a drink....which because of the ridiculously poor service at the Ghion Hotel took 3-4 hours to actually complete. Adrian had Steak which was advertised in the menu as coming with vegetables, which to be fair turned up...but an hour after the steak.....the worst thing was they then had the cheek to still charge us the 10% service charge...bastards. Oh well, we had an entertaining chat...which at one point lead to Adrian and myself trying to explain the attraction of Neighbours to 3 people who hadn't even heard of it. Needless to say the night soon lead to a drink fest, but this time in a traditional Ethiopian Bar...complete with traditional music players (who's job it is basically to make up lyrics that mock the ferenji/foreigners in the bar) and dancers. It was brilliant, made even more so when (after going to the toilet) Tati emerged with a baby Antelope....we are still not sure what it was or where it came from, but it took a poo on Jesse so it was entertaining. We left the other 3 loving the music (Jesse had become quite the shoulder dancer by this time) and Ethiopian Banter, and headed of to bed (separate beds I must stress) as we had a early morning bus to catch to Gondar.

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