Day 31: Nothing but blue skies and 200 flea bites

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Geo: 15.875, 108.336

Mac woke this morning to lots of itchy bites on the ankles. Thinking that some fleas hopped into his socks yesterday at the fisherman's hut and settled in for a good chow down! Got to use the Stingose though and because it was a rest day he could recuperate with the iPad and a bit of banking, reading, current affairs and gaming.

Number one job of the morning was to face numbers 1, 2, 3 and 4 laundry ladies and get the washing done. Twee had suggested we "share" the work around to give a few ladies a little bit of income each. Richard had been greeted everyday by Lady Number 1 so headed to her establishment. Loraine hit Lady Number 2 and we visited Number 4. Embarrassingly your laundry is tipped into a plastic basin on the pavement and then item by dirty item it is held in the air and the value "added" to the total. My bras and undies were flapped around for the passing world to see and much to the joy of Lady Number 4, I mimed an "embarrassment dance" for each of the "smalls" she waved at the passers by (gosh, this is one time I wished they were small!) displayed. Can't get over the maths skills! We had 32 items (sock by sock included) and this was just part of her normal daily mental arithmetic calculations. No calculator needed.

Picked everything up at 5 pm. Every item accounted for in team WayJay. Washed and smelling beautifully fresh and ironed and packaged to perfection!

Of course, before all of this started, Richard had been out to visit Twee's husband for the mandatory pork bun and had spotted a riverside dinner recommendation

We are on the run down now to home and have factored in "vacation" days rather than touring days. There was nothing planned on the agenda.

I set out early to the markets with nothing more that my wallet and instructions on the importance of the river in getting me back home! Mac had even supplied me with a piece of notepaper with the hotel name on it. But I still managed to get hopelessly lost and thankfully LO_RI actually spotted me when I was in a lather of sweat anxiously trying to locate Yalys.

But I did manage to get a couple of skirts for Mum, a flat bill fold wallet to replace Mac's "money handkerchief", a wheelie bag for extra packing room, a couple of shirts and designed and ordered two pairs of leather shoes (they will be ready tomorrow morning.)

And it was exhausting. Still find no pleasure in the haggling! Does my head in!

We all skipped lunch in favour of a cold (fixed price, no bargaining needed) beverages from the corner store. Found Cruisers, beer and Bundaberg soft drinks!

And then, while Mac continued to NOT scratch and conquer more Civilisations, LO_RI and I headed out for Flower's 30% off discount pedicure, manicure and spa. Flower had greeted us each day in her green dress on our walks so was the spa of choice. Not sure on the hygiene regulations or the the training of the team, just decided to sit back and let the world go by...,at least she wasn't shaking my undies at the passers by!

Richard had been stopped earlier in the day by a spa lady in the street when he and Loraine were going to Yaly's to pick up the belts. She had attacked him with a piece of string and "threaded" a few of his whiskers as a demo. After enduring the torture of hair removal on the street, he was keen to let Flower know he was only here for the pedicure.

Flower called for reinforcements and as more customers arrived, the girls pulled up on motor bikes, marshalled by the call to duty. And so the work began. I had no idea how much dead skin you have on the soles of your feet. But once Lily had crafted the "sterile" razor and set to work they needed to back in a skip on a tiptruck to cart away the pile of scrapings from my feet. I thought I'd paid those lazy fish in Cambodia to complete that job! Loraine probably went one better than me because she hadn't had the fish do the preliminaries. It was gross and the squatting "therapy specialists" were definitely amused.

I know we agreed on the code..."what happens in the spa, stays in the spa".... but do want to say that the unnamed client in the third chair was a little "tender" and the usual relaxed moans and purrs of the therapies were replaced with "ouch, oh, ouch" "no, no, no" and "not that"..... if only they sold pork buns!

Loraine left with a manicure and the deluxe pedicure, I left with new toe nail polish and massaged legs and Richard left with his dignity intact. Not sure what extras we have taken for free from the stained seats, the shared plastic buckets and the non sterilised nail clippers and scrapers, the buffers and the razors. Time will surely tell.

The group spent the rest of the afternoon at the pool...alternating between snoozing, reading and floating about. Did have a little bit of excitement as a metre long green snake slithered into the pool area. Caused a bit of commotion as some of the ladies hopped from deck chair to deck chair and the barefooted staff danced around as they swept it up and threw it over the fence.

Headed out for an early dinner and enjoyed Miss Ana's menu at a table overlooking the river and of course, as always in Hoi An, our dinner view was festooned with the colours of the ever present silk lanterns. We love playing our own version of dinner bingo and never know what order the meals will come out in and who will get what course first. But with cocktails (Mac's was a flammer) and a very chilled bottle bottle of wine it really didn't matter.

As if dinner wasn't enough, we left Miss Ana and detoured into The Riverside cafe for dessert and a final drink.

It was a day of absolutely nothing but still managed to clock up 12 500 steps in the markets. Actually, don't think Mac can claim that count, other than breakfast, dinner, a dip in the pool and a laundry run, he didn't move from the couch outside the room.

Steps: 12 544
Temperature: 31 degrees - what a relief

PS Think I found the night life of Hoi An. I was running outside to reception at 2 am trying to get internet connection so I could chat with Mindy. O'Malley's was alive with music and crowds of yahooing and cheering patrons. Think that at 11 pm we are going to bed before the town comes alive.

PPS Health update. As well as the indignity of the bites, Mac is suffering from what feels like a pulled muscle in his back - was a little competitively over zealous in casting, net pedalng and boat rowing yesterday.

PPPS Disaster. LO_RI are a pair of socks short from Laundry Lady 1.

PPPPS Spent the morning huddled over the form guide looking for a "Jack *anything*" omen bet. Didn't find one....but was such a great day it must be out there to come.

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Comments

[Aunty Gail]

I have NOTHING to say.......my jaws are aching from laughter, my stomach hurts from laughter, and my eyes are overflowing with tears (from laughter)!!! No one (not even you Jan), could make all this up....hilarious - bring on tomorrow, I
can't wait!!!!!!.....xxxxxxx

[Elizabeth McPhee]

Loved to have been a fly on the wall today. Or possibly a flea? Love the tales of the street laundry inspections and the pedicures!What can one say?!?All I've got is - "looking at the picture I could say - Jan, you need a leg wax" - but
I know it's really Wayne's leg.