hi Blasto,
First of all, I think you should be proud of yourself for being brave enough to even think about going travelling, particularly with the extra challenge of having aspergers. Remember as well that for every person who has been everywhere and said 'just do it' there are a hundred people who would never even consider stepping out of their comfort zone.
I was nearly 20 years older than you when I travelled properly for the first time and I can tell you that I had several sleepless nights the week before I left! From my experiences, I can offer a few tips which I hope might help you.
1. When I felt scared, I let myself feel scared. I didn't try and talk myself out of it, or tell myself I shouldn't feel like that. I just let it be. It sounds like you're already doing some of this, acknowledging your fears.
2. I took a few things with me for comfort: some pictures of my close friends and family; a pair of red shoes that I knew I would never get the chance to wear in the places I was going (!) but which I could take out of my backpack and look at from time to time - and I wrapped them in a familiar carrier bag from home.
3. Once I was away, in the early weeks when I was still feeling strange, whenever I felt a bit overwhelmed I reminded myself that I could go home anytime I wanted - if you have the means to always have your airfare home, even if on a credit card, or know you could contact your family who could wire you money to get home, then this just feels like a bit of a safety net. I used to think to myself, ' I can just get to the nearest airport and leave if I want, so because I know I don't HAVE to be here, I might as well just see it as an adventure that I can stop whenever I like.'
4. I reminded myself that I wasn't in a particular place for ever, just for now. I think the panic feeling that can come over us sometimes is often just about forgetting that the situation we're in is not permanent.
5. If you're going to travel for a long-ish period of time, it's worth remembering that it really does get easier with time; it all feels so different at first, but it's amazing how quickly you will soon settle in to travelling and it becomes a way of life just like anything does.
People have said some very useful things on this thread - as Mell mentioned, the internet can really be a lifesaver in terms of still feeling very connected with people back home. So can texting - I remember one occasion I was on a train in India in a carriage full of men with everyone staring at me constantly, and I felt really uncomfortable - it was such a comfort that I could just send a text to my sister telling her about it! Internet cafes are everywhere on travel routes and can be a good place to hide in when you're feeling overwhelmed - there were times when I spent a whole day just on the internet, which was a bit of a break from what was going on outside. Writing my blog helped a lot too, I found it quite a grounding experience, and sometimes I used my blogs to write about how I was feeling, which helped to move the feeling on.
Yes, also a good idea to take it gradually and build up. Are you from Oz? (guessing so as you mentioned going to NZ as being closer to home). One thing to consider might be that you would possibly feel ok travelling a long way from home if the place you're going to isn't a completely different culture from your own - obviously all cultures and countries are different but the differences really vary don't they? so (assuming you ARE from Australia) you might actually find it easier to travel in the UK, than if you went somewhere like Indonesia for example - you may be further from home in distance in the UK, but you might not feel it so much because it's an English speaking country and there are similarities in the cultures. So it might be good to think about building up in terms of experiencing different cultures, as much as building up in terms of distance from home.
I'd also say in terms of your aspergers, (I'm assuming here that you feel better when you have some kind of routine, and some sense of what's going to happen next and how) that you could plan your trip in terms of setting up a routine you can have even though you're travelling - for example you could say that every morning you'll have breakfast, look through your guidebook, write down what you want to do that day etc (like I said, just an example, it could be any daily routine that helps keep you grounded). If you travelled somewhere like New Zealand, you could arrange to always stay in YHA hostels - it's very easy to book ahead either by going online, or asking at the hostel you're staying in - the hostel is always very happy to phone for you and book you a bed in the next place - if it made you feel better, you could even plan out well in advance where you're going and when, and then if you change your mind while you're travelling, it's normally easy to just change your bookings. There are also plenty of day tours you can go on, so if you don't always feel comfortable planning your own itinerary to see a particular place, you can book on a tour which will be organised for you - you'll know what time it starts, and what time it will finish, and what will happen during the day.
You'll also find that people are usually very helpful - hostel workers will tell you everything you need to know, and you will meet so many other travellers who always have useful information and can be great company when you don't want to be by yourself. Everywhere you visit that is on a well-travelled route is very set up for travellers and tourists, with accommodation, good transport, internet access, money exchange, banks, tourist offices and information - and you will easily find all the information you need - I promise you that it is so much easier than what you are imagining!
Anyway, I hope whatever you decide, and whenever you decide it, that you have a fantastic time. Do it in your own time, when you're ready - you'll know when that time is 😊
Reply to this 
