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Not a big deal but kind of it is, my old maid Luz named her new baby after me. Probably as a thank you for making her bring me breakfast in bed while watching Star Trek TNG reruns every Saturday. I was going to title this blog The Fall of Julius Ceasar because Maria´s dad (whose name is Julio Ceasar) is anti-balance like I´m anti-mayonnaise or republicans are anti-minorities. During his first half day he fell like three times much to the merriment of Maria and her mother. Unfortunately the third time he fell he dropped his camera into the water-filled bottom of the boat that was taking us to the islands off Cartagena. A nice Argentine family tracked us down and gave it back to us, but alas cameras and water mix worse than a desire to have an unchafed undercarriage and a trip to Worlds Of Fun. Maria’s mom seemed to have a good time, at the beach she only stopped smiling long enough to take another sip out of her rum-filled coconut or to get a massage. We went to the coffee region (eje cafetero) for a few days to stay at a coworker’s farm. Armenia has a
pretty solid trifecta of touristy offerings. The first day we went to the Valle de Cocora and rode horses up an impossible steep mountain. I say we but the parents took one look at the mountain’s incline and quickly got off their horses and walked back. It was seriously terrifying but awesome. The second day we went to the Coffee Park, which I thought would be lame but turned out to be the most fun day of the trip. I died laughing watching Maria’s mom get repeatedly lapped as she took her “don’t let them rush you” attitude to the go-kart track, or her dad atop a tiny donkey while everyone else got a normal sized horse on the horseback riding expedition, or her mom for the 2
nd day in a row get off her horse and walk back, this time because she didn’t like the horse’s attitude. We rode bumper boats and after her parents inexplicably turned theirs off we pushed them into the fountain and left them there to get soaked (assuring future chafing). The worker had to go out there and save them. The third day we went to Panaca, kind of a souped up petting zoo/farm
for the whole family. It was overly large like the Africa section of the KC zoo and it began to torrentially rain trapping us on a bridge. They had to send buses for us. The only other travelling we’ve done is to Santa Marta where I got violently deathly ill and quickly returned home. However, the school year is coming to a close and Jeni and Zach are coming for a week, we have our Master’s course which I enjoy, and then we leave for Europe. I’m crazy pumped for all three and ready for a vacation since we didn’t really get one last summer when we changed countries. In domestic news I castrated one of my cats and discovered how much I enjoy rubbing cream on the place where his balls used to be as he healed. Well, I didn’t castrate him personally, but I took him to be castrated and now I have trouble holding eye contact with him. There’s so much judgment there. Maria may or may not be allergic to them, the cats not their balls. We’re going to the doctor this week to see what’s up. One of them loves rolling around in recently mopped
bleachy floors. And he’s the less retarded one. We bought our tickets to Uruguay for Christmas vacation next year, two weeks of eating armadillo cooked in its own shell, drinking 7 y 3 and chasing ostriches. Ostrichii, how do you pluralize that?
5 Things I think:
1. I like the smell of asparagus pee and I'm not ashamed to admit it.
2. Boxer Briefs are g-strings for boys. They may look nice, but they mash up my business, are super uncomfortable, and don’t have a hole for peeing.
3. If I was the type to sleep with married musicians I'd probably justify it to myself by pointing to how many good songs come from broken relationships, which I'm helping to create.
4. Any list of top ten midgets/dwarves that doesn’t include Bushwick Bill is a farce and insulting.
5. Teachers Day came and went and I didn’t expect any of you to wish me a good one, because I’m not YOUR teacher. Just like I don’t wish anyone a happy Mother’s Day who is not MY mother.
Youtube: This is really more than a youtube clip, it’s a
Valle de Cocoro
And two people who didn't die. Ka-Boom. shout out to the amazing amount of work put in by JWine, Mike Karlin, Robbie Something or other, and Aubrey. I love the beginning of this, and I’m excited to see the rest of it when it’s finished.
http://artificialsunrise.com/trailer.html Movie: I’ve watched some great documentaries lately like Being Elmo, Children Underground, Dark Days, and The Interrupters. I’d like to see them mixed together: A world famous puppeteer living in the lightless tunnels under New York with the glue sniffing flotsam and jetsam of Romania’s anti-abortion law trying to mediate violent conflicts.
Book: I read the Hunger Games Trilogy and finally got around to reading American Gods which was awesome. The trilogy was more of a work requirement so I can still communicate on some level with my students.
Music: Perfume Genius’s new album, It’s kind of the type of album you have to listen to the whole thing like The xx. I also like Gotye. Sounds like a mix of old U2 and something you’d play while holding a boom box over your head.
When I first arrived at the school it was
freaking horrible, everyone treated me like a black jew. ~ Student Autobiography
My father is a anesthesiologist and he can be in all the surgeries, but he prefers the boob job and butt job. ~ Student Autobiography
A man's respect for law and order exists in precise relationship to the size of his paycheck.
~ Adam Clayton Powell Jr.
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samantha lane
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Hi Uncle Joel! So how it in South America?