CARNIVAL (should come with a health warning)

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Day 30 - 37

Good news…I am alive, in one piece and been without a beer for two days now. I have unexplained bruises on my body, various little cuts from who knows what and a hangover to report that lasted three days. The body is on its way to recovery, the head is still a bit cloudy and the liver is still groaning. I have never before drunk consecutively like that and operated on so little sleep. So was it worth it? Every single minute! I can honestly say I have never experienced anything like the last seven days - the colours, the sounds, the people, the lack of sleep, the drinking - all culminating to make the best week of my life (and I realise that is quite a statement)! I just hope I can convey how good the week at Carnival in Salvador really was and if this blog makes little sense (I did warn you it might) then all I can say is make sure you experience this at least once in your lifetime…simply amazing. You wont regret it!

So, grab yourself a cup of tea, minimise the spreadsheet and get comfortable - this could go on for a while!

February 10th - Carnival Day 1

Ok, so this wasn’t the official start of Carnival, but for me it was the day I met up with Nath and Dean, two best mates from home. We had booked a villa in Itapua back in August last year and Carnival has been something we have all been looking forward to for some time especially, as I hadn’t seen Nath for five months as he has been travelling himself since September. I flew into Salvador from Porte Alegre and had to get to the main bus station, where I would meet the boys 4 hours later. Contact was made and they were en route, in fact, out of coincidence, I turned my head to see Nathans long blonde lock getting off a bus an hour early - cue the reunion cuddles and kisses. We had a couple of beers at the bus station whilst waiting for our rep to pick us up and take us to our villa. And what a place! Somehow we had managed to fall on our feet in a big way…3 double bedrooms, a single bedroom, 3 bathrooms, decent kitchen and dining area, massive lounge and most importantly a good sized pool with entertainment area! I’d like to take the credit for this, but it was Nath who booked this…by far the best thing the boy has achieved to date! We met up with Cutty (aka Mark Carrington) and Alan Blood (aka Alan Blood), two friends from home who I didn’t really know but who I got to know really well during the week and whose company I thoroughly enjoyed. After jumping in the pool fully clothed and dumping our things (quite literally) we walked for ten minutes back into town to have a few beers and a good catch up. It was here that Nath told me he had invited some other people he had met whilst away to come and stay, something I was initially disappointed about as I wanted to spend time with my mates, but also something that turned out to be the second best thing he has achieved. We were to be joined by two kiwi guys (Jason and Mikey) who were riding around South America on motorbikes and two or three young ladies (to maintain the house and provide nourishment to the man folk). Whilst sitting having a beer, two kiwi guys stroll over, having ridden 1200 kms that day in order to join the party. They only knew we were staying in Itapua and having checked into a hostel they did the sensible thing, heading for the nearest bar…and guess who you bump into! I like how you get an initial feeling for someone and I knew that these two guys would be really good value and I would enjoy spending time with them. After a couple more beers, time was called and we made our way back to the villa for a relatively early night in anticipation of the carnage to follow.

February 11th - Carnival Day 2

We awoke early to the sound of motorbike engines from the front gate. The two kiwi guys had arrived! After showing them around the party palace we went into town to get some shopping, returning to meet the next crew member - Jennifer from England. We were later joined by Natasha from Canada and Anita from England. The rest of the afternoon was spent getting to know each other, exchange stories over a ’few’ beers and generally hanging out in and around the pool listening to music in the sunshine…I’m still finding it tough and trying hard to adjust!

Anyway, here’s how the group dynamic brakes down.

Nathan (26) - great mate from home who I have known since primary years (notably when C. Gordon scored past him at junior school and he cried). He has shed his youthful puppy fat and is now a fitness fanatic, with long blonde hair and a self styled tramp. A big hit with the lady folk (of all sizes), loves all things drinking and not shy about exposing his middle stump.

Dean (26) - another great mate from home and my fitness partner, having been on at least three runs together, as well as seven bike rides. Gets hammered after two pints, then stays on a level for the rest of session, he is always a livewire and never far from the action. Has a phobia of cameras!!

Jason (39) - kiwi guy who took a redundancy package in order to come away for six months. In his younger days he played a high level of rugby, is a big guy with a big heart who has promised to take me fishing, diving and hunting when I get to NZ. Does a great impression of a dolphin…and sometimes a spontaneous ‘naked dolphin’ impressions get thrown in for good measure.

Mikey (39) - kiwi guy who likes looking for things in the ground. Having worked all over the world he married a Brazilian lady only for things to ‘not quite work out’. It appears the ground has presented things of much value, as he is now retired and literally living the dream. At 39 he has led such an interesting life already, which I’m sure is set to continue. Amazingly down to earth, yet incredibly generous, a non stop drinker and a serious pursuer of the female form. He has big hair…but we don’t care!

Cutty (26) - more Nath and Deans friend from home, I have met a number of times but never really spoken to at length. An introvert guy between the hours of 06:00 - 22:00 but comes alive once numerous lagers and caipirinhas have been consumed and is often hard to keep quiet. A big hit with the Brazilian ladies and makes his move in the subtlest of ways. Affectionately known as ‘shiny man’ or ‘milky’ due to his liberal application of factor 50 sun lotion.

Alan Blood (29) - went to uni with Nath and somebody I have seen out a couple of times. A man of few words, but whose words are insightful, interesting and more often than not, damn funny. Another candidate for the whitest man in Brazil, has some formidable dance moves and his middle name is ‘Cosmo’. Lovely bloke who I really enjoyed getting know.

Jennifer - from the UK, a sweet girl who was good value to have around the villa and made superb pancakes. Looks exactly the same as Nathan…good at losing Nathans camera.

Natasha - from Canada. Great sense of humour and always up for a laugh or a drink. An advocate of all things American, she took on the nickname of America for her time at the villa, something she seemed to embrace quite well. Greets you with a typically American handshake, loves George. W. Bush and pretends she can play football (soccer). She also spurned Nathans advances on the penultimate night which heightens my opinion of her!

Anita (30) - UK. Enough said

Jasen - a uni mate of Nath and Alan Blood who joined a day later. Good bloke during the day, nightmare on the piss. Made a good roast dinner!

Me (27) - you can make your own minds up but my Mum thinks I’m an angel!

So now you know the crew, back to the story! This night was the warm up for carnival and we headed into town at night time o’ clock. I thought we went to an area of Salvador called Campe Grande but apparently we were in a place we would spend the majority of our time, in Barra. The bus ride into town proved more than interesting, intermingling with the locals who were surprised to see gringo’s on their bus! The interaction was friendly and they seemed to enjoy us being there…I know I certainly enjoyed being there and observing (through slightly blurred vision) how they were preparing to party. Already it was obvious that they knew how to have a good time, which made the anticipation all the more exciting. Highlight/lowlight of the trip was after pulling away from a bus stop having just picked up some passengers, a massive explosion came from the back of the bus and the back window splintered and shattered. Automatically I thought the worst and thought it was a bullet (cue the bowel movement) but was informed it was only somebody throwing a bottle at the window. Oh…no worries then! Thankfully nobody was sitting on the seats directly beneath the window and only a couple of people suffered minor cuts. It didn’t appear to be a big deal as the bus carried on its route, picking up other passengers and dropping people at their intended destination, all with glass covering the floor. Another experience to look back on!

After getting off the bus, Mikey decided he had had enough already and chose to head back to the villa. I thought kiwi blokes could drink, but he really seemed to let down his nation at this point…and when his mate Jason went too, I was starting to question the pair of them. They redeemed themselves pretty quickly over the next few days though!! We lost the American and Anita shortly after, taking the team to six and managed to find an area that seemed to be pretty lively. All were having a good time, enjoying the atmosphere and taking in the scenery until Jen tried to take a photo with Nath’s camera, only to have it ripped from her grasp. It all happened so quickly and although the police were quickly on the scene, not much could be done. It put a bit of a dampener on the night and we headed back to Itapua, where on arrival, and outside a strip club which was just up the road from our villa, kiwi Jason was sitting in the boot of a police car. Instinctively myself and Cutty went over to see what was going on and apparently he had started a fight. Jason’s story was that he ordered two drinks and they charged him 120 Reais…about £40 for the privilege! On refusal to pay such a ridiculous amount they tried to throw him out, no mean feat in itself, and he obviously retaliated. I thought the cops wanted money as a bribe to free him, so Cutty and I emptied our wallets only to see the money disappear into their top pockets and never to be seen again. With Jason still not freed, an expensive lesson was learnt. Long story short, Mikey arrived on the scene and managed to rectify the situation with his fluent Portuguese, but not after Jason had been taken for a ‘drive’ and told in no uncertain terms his actions were not welcome. Moral of the story - frequent strip clubs by all means, don’t order ridiculously priced drinks!!

February 12th - Carnival Day 3 / February 13th - Carnival Day 4

Today, being Friday, was the official start of Carnival and we had been told that it was going to be good in the part of town we were staying. (I need to mention that this could well have been the next day because between all of us, we are missing a night. We collectively remember six out of the seven nights, but for reasons unexplained, can’t work out what happened or what we did on this missing day/evening. Only slightly worrying!).

Anyway, the day took on a familiar routine of people waking up around midday, a whip collected and ’volunteers’ going to the supermarket and getting supplies, someone then making ham and cheese rolls for the group and then enjoying the sun in and around the pool, accompanied by ‘one or two’ alcoholic refreshments. A bbq was prepared around 17:00 and then the tempo increased with the introduction of some caipirinhas. Jason took it upon himself to surprise the rest of the group with his impression of a naked dolphin! Don’t ask me where it came from, but having briefly showed his ability to communicate as a mammal earlier in the day, he proceeded to splash about in the pool stark bollock naked, which wouldn’t have been as funny, had he not been a front row rugby player! He had everyone in stitches…Flipper has nothing on Jason!

Heading into town around 22:00 we were greeted with a mixture of stares, winks and nudges from the locals who seemed surprised that we were partying in their town. Indeed it seemed we were the only gringo’s on show, which in all honesty made for a far better experience. We came across a bar/club which was literally the lounge of somebody’s house and we danced for hours to the small band (making a big noise) on the stage. The locals were happy to mingle with us, try and chat as best they can, drink with us and attempt to teach us to dance. The girls were a big hit with the guys…and the Brazilian women were a big hit with us! My dancing shoes were not exactly polished that night and after making a tit of myself on more than one occasion I was more than happy to watch everyone else from the sidelines. Brazilians really know how to dance and move their bodies…a great thing to watch. We moved outside to where the main stage was situated and proceeded to watch the entertainment there, consisting of a few bands, all playing tradition Brazilian music, all of which puts a smile on peoples faces. Although it was really busy, it was a real family affair and some of the little girls dressed up for the occasion were very cute. A good night was had by all and it was off to bed to recharge the batteries for the next day.

February 14th - Carnival Day 5

Again the day started in much the same way as the day before and it was here that I realised how much of a God send the pool was. The sun was pretty relentless between 10:00 and 15:00 and I think we would have really struggled with the combination of sunshine and hangover without it. We made a conscious effort to get into town early tonight, as Mikey was getting agitated - the fact he has lived in South America for ten years means he is more in tune with their behaviour and had all of our best interests at heart. However, we were in the middle of some serious drinking games at this point and were not about to let the small issue of the worlds largest dance extravaganza get in our way. We got on the bus about 22:00 and arrived in Barra 45 minutes later. Again the bus ride was a highlight, a cacophony of drunken English football chanting (all tasteful and the locals enjoyed it, before anyone thinks we’re thugs) coupled with some Brazilian singing, which almost rivalled our tuneful chants pretending that we had just scored a goal. Its funny looking back, that whilst all our idiocy was going on, there was a lunatic up front in charge of ferrying us from A to B in the quickest manner possible. You just have to put your trust in these drivers and let them do their thing!

When we got off the bus and whilst we were orientating ourselves, the American had her bag ripped from off her shoulder. The lads set off in pursuit of the two culprits and when one of them stumbled over after about 200 metres, the fatties and unfitties (yes that included me) jumped on the little s*** threatening him with colourful language and a trip to the hospital. Being only 14 or 15 years old, nobody brought themselves to give him the slap he deserved and when we realised he was not going to take us to his mate and with no police around, we had to let him go. Very frustrating! We think he fell over on possible, allowing his mate to get away…and then we realised Nath wasn’t with us. We could see his blonde locks in the distance walking back towards us and when he arrived, explained he had given chase for a good few metres further than my aerobic capacity could take me, only for the thief to jump onto a bus and make his getaway. Nath apparently chased the bus for a while, which must have provided endless laughter to the locals, seeing a squeaky voiced gringo male impersonating a lady, with long blonde hair, chase down a bus along the busy streets of Salvador. I only wish he had caught up with the bus…what would you have done next Nath?!

After the rubbish start, we realised that nothing could be done and decided to enjoy ourselves. It was only superficial stuff that can be replaced and at least it had not been anything violent! The thieves seem to be more opportune than anything else, so don’t let this put you off, just be sensible, keep things hidden and don’t take out what you can’t afford to lose. We walked up a hill to look down onto the main street where the parade passes through and I can honestly say I have never been so impressed with what I saw. The vibrant colours, the mixture of ages, the number of people, how loud the music was…we had arrived at Carnival! The remainder of the night is a bit hazy, and kind of blends into the next two nights as well, but I remember being in the street and being in ore of the surroundings. The floats with the bands and performers on were amazing, with different (yet similar) music pumping from each one. Between trucks there was a sea of people, all seemingly there for the same experience and intent on enjoying themselves to the max. We tried as best we could to blend in and replicate the dancing, but when 11 gringos all dance together (especially in the attire we were sporting) it was fairly obvious we weren’t from round these parts. It didn’t seem to matter and the locals were happy for us to be there, dancing and chatting as best we could…it all seemed very friendly, even though we had been advised that dancing in the street ‘pipoca’ (Portuguese for popcorn - imagine popcorn cooking, bouncing up and down and that’s how they describe the dancing) style is dangerous as the security is not as tight. It was our only option as we had left it too late to buy tickets for the floats and there was no way we were going to miss out. In hindsight this was the ultimate blessing, as not only did we feel safe (due to a high police presence) but we got to see the different trucks and their entertainment parade by and follow the one we liked the sound/look of, rather than being stuck behind one truck all night. I thoroughly recommend this way of doing it, especially if you are in a large group…and you really do feel part of it, although the toilet situation can sometimes be a bit of a problem and creativity needs to play its part!

February 15th - Carnival Day 6

After a slow start and not feeling totally human, some fruit was taken on board, a couple of glasses of h2o were consumed and we were back into the swing of things, lazing by the pool, regaling tales from the previous night. The same routine as days gone by, getting into town around 23:00. My memory from this night was walking behind Dean down the hill to the main street whilst he was wearing the scariest rubber Elton John mask I have seen. I have never seen so many double takes in my life, most met with laughter, others with looks of disbelief…but the mask went down well, especially with the youngsters. A weird half an hour!

This night was better than the previous night as we were there earlier and it seemed busier somehow, though I’m sure that wasn’t the case. Wherever you looked people were having a good time and the beer vendors at the side of the road were certainly enjoying us being around. It was another amazing night (so the photos say) and I wish I could remember more of it! I do remember Dean, Nath and Cutty pirouetting like ballerinas at the end of the parade, before Dean and Nath decided it was a good idea to swim in dirt for a good 20 minutes. Those two really do amaze me at times with their impromptu stupidity and randomness…who would have thought Dean was a construction manager back home! The locals looked shocked at first, then began to find it funny…shame they didn’t join in.

February 16th - Carnival Day 7

So today was the last day we would be partying in Salvador and in all honesty I can say my liver was not disappointed! If yesterday was slow, today was slower and Dean was really feeling it! I’m not sure if it was the swimming in dirt the previous night or the ear infection he had picked up, but he didn’t look in great shape and it appeared the team would be one short in the evening. I wasn’t feeling overly enthusiastic myself and the first beer went down like nails…along with the second and third. Luckily Nath was in better shape, as he usually is at times like this and another drinking game was instigated at around 20:00. Participants were reluctant yet still managing to take part. I was very slow out of the blocks which automatically made me a target and a few drinks were dished my way in quick succession, which looking back now was my saving grace! The American was picked on far worse with Jason referring to her as Dub Dub for some reason and she was more than ticking by the time we left.

Arriving at the same place at about the same time, the floats seemed a bit more vibrant tonight (this may have something to do with me being a bit more sober) and I paid a bit more attention. We mingled into the crowd and danced about 150 metres down the road, congregating outside a police stand where we presumed we’d be safe. We were! Tonight was probably my best night, even though we were down a Dean (who had been a constant source of entertainment/amusement), with the highlight being a guy coming through the crowd painting faces, arms and legs with various patterns. We managed to commandeer the paint pot and proceeded to paint each other in not so carnival style, my favourite being Jason who managed to resemble a panda with his ridiculous face paint! All harmless fun, all managed to stick together and all managed to get home in one piece on what was our latest night, arriving at the villa just before 06:00.

What a fantastic experience Carnival has been and what a great group to experience it with. A mixture of really different personalities that really brought the group together and some friendships made that will develop and last. Thoroughly enjoyed getting to know Alan Blood who was an all round nice guy; Cutty, the whiter than white Englishman that can sleep at any time anywhere, then spontaneously changes into party boy with some dance moves that should be patented; Mikey and Jason - two of the nicest guys I have ever met. The age difference was never a problem and they enjoyed our company as much as we did theirs. I am confident we will remain friends for a long while and I am very much looking forward to seeing them in the Bay of Islands in NZ in June. My trip around NZ may change considerably because of these two, but in a good way, seeing a part of the country I’d not planned on, through the eyes of two local guys who know the place inside out - should be a great trip.

This week will live long in the memory for a variety of reasons and although this is lengthy blog, I hope I have managed to share some of those experiences with you. Make sure you do this at least once in your lifetime (if you do it twice you’re either brave or stupid) and make sure you train your liver beforehand.

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Photos

Me...
...sporting a variety of wares made from aluminium ring pulls. Paid £3 for a sweet belt

Shiny Man
what Cutty does best

Kiwi in the Bushes
...a very subtle pee Jas

Nath & Me
...something funny lads?

Dean
Camera shy as always!

Jen, Local, Me && Nath
...looks like i made a discovery

Jason & Mikey
Trying their luck with the local offerings

Nath...
... shaking what mumma gave him

Nath...
...just before having his face painted!

The Lads
Beer please!

The Pool...
...always worried me when Jason didn't mover from there for hours, yet drank 10 cans!

Jason & Me
..and yes that is a dress

Me & WTF
Literally..WTF

Comments

[Elise]

Brilliant!
Sounds amazing babe...so so glad you're having such a wicked time. We miss you though x x x