Chim Chim Charoo

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All this week I've come home covered in soot. i've been very tempted to dance around like an idiot and sing that chimney sweep song from Mary Poppins, but i have refrained for Bob and Lorraine's sake. they'd surely banish me to the caravan for something like that. i suppose i should explain why i come home sooted everyday; man, you people are so demanding.

Explanation ready go: Bob has an area of land from the garden to the river covered in scrub (bushes) and dead trees (dead trees). my professional tractor mowing skills (okay really i've knocked over 4 fence posts, a tree Bob wanted to keep, and i've broken the tractor at least twice) took care of most of the scrub, but we can't mow trees (well big ones anyway heh heh....hehhh) and logs so...burn baby, burn. it's not that easy though; we have to burn, push all the leftovers together, burn some more, wash, rinse, repeat...you get the idea. trees take forever to burn off, so it's seemingly endless, hence bryan the chimney sweep.
Chim Chim Charoo.

the weather here has been fantastic...as long as the sun is up. when the sun is not up it is freezing. the pipes froze yesterday for the first time ever. Bob and Lorraine rightfully blamed me. nasty americans are always bringing bad weather with them. now, when the sun is shining, which it usually is once it decides to say hello, the temps are in the 60's and 70's. sounds delightful doesn't it? it's not. australia is in the middle of a drought. this is the rainy season, but apparently mother nature didn't get the memo. so everytime i take a shower i feel very evil. i've only taken 3 showers since i've been here. E-V-I-L times 3.

Note: there's nothing exciting in this entry so you should definitely keep reading.

Bryan vs. The Ants
Round 1:
Lorraine left me some Lifesavers candy on my bed as a welcoming gift, mmmmmm! i ate a few, left them on the counter, went for a walk, and returned to find a pile of Ant-Savers where my candy had been. you win this round, Ants, but i'll have you know that i will not go softly into that good night. since then i wash every dish thoroughly and never leave so much as a crumb from my morning feast of toast and jam to tempt them. victory was surely mine, but i could feel them always nearby, waiting for me to make a careless mistake.

Round 2: the careless mistake
i noticed a couple ants in my trash just hangin' out, so i tied it up and set it by the door to go out to the "Rubbish Bin" (which i found out today does not exist.) i returned from working on friday to find the Queen Ant had been assembling an army in the trash bag. they had already begun their attack, marching along the crevices in the walls and counter tops. they had ambushed the microwave and were flanking the toaster...my appliances were doomed and defenseless! i scrambled through cabinets searching for cleaner, bleach, air freshener, any weapon that comes in a spray bottle. toothbrush? no. waffle iron? no time for waffles you fool; this is war! ah hah! my salvation is found...prepare to meet your demise, Ants! one foul swoop of perverbial insect napalm and the wall crevices are turned into a black-speckled graveyard. what sort of super weapon could inflict such efficient death? what miracle of human ingenuity could possibly producde this nearly instant victory?!
...insect spray. duh.

So as we roll into the weekend i'll leave you with a bit of Australian terminology, ie funny names for everyday things. i know, i know, you feel ripped off...crap for pictures, a glorified insect problem thrown in as filler, and now i'm giving you a glossary. you have every right to protest. but do not fret my friends! Rachel, Lorraine's grandaughter, and Anthony, guy who's working for Rachel's dad, are taking me spear fishing on Saturday! so many painful things could happen to me! i can tell you're excited about the possibilities. as am i. to bryan's impending misfortune!

Cheers

boot - trunk of a car
bonnet - hood of a car
windscreen - windshield
biscuit - cookie (try to explain to an australian what it is WE call a biscuit and you will only get blank faces)
lolli - any sort of hard candy
jumper - sweatshirt, sweater, fleece, etc.
chook - chicken
buoy (pronounced "boy") - buoy (pronounced booey)

that's all i can think of right now...

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Photos

Kairoo and Lorraine
evening feeding is kairoo's favorite time of day...aside from when i'm petting her, of course.

Kairoo Posing
if she had locks and there was wind, her locks would be blowing in the wind.

Suspect Characters
they look innocent and sweet...but i'm pretty sure one or both of them pooped in my shoe.

Kangaroo Island at Night
the stars are magnificent here...my pictures don't do them justice. i said magnificent...weird.

Kangaroo Island at Night #2
this photo is crap too! yes!

Tree Goats
"man, we should have been giraffes."

Comments

[Joan]

bicuits
We will have to send you a box of bisquick so you can show them how us American's roll.

[Yo]

mama
Applause! Applause! More! More! Encore! Hug, kiss, and I miss you!

[amy]

ahhh
I love you Bryan, truly.

[Becky]

umm... dumpling maybe?
tell them it's a "dumpling". that's the closest association i can think of. anyway, glad you defeated the ants, but thye'll be back another day to try and annex your caravan. you can be sure of that!

[Rose]

My advice
I still say don't use your Australian accent love you

[kati]

"Step'n Time"
Wow, good times...Soot baths, psychotic ants, drought, marsupial poop in the shoe...yes the best of times. I want a Kairoo...me too, me too!! Riley adores her. She laughs and points at her picture and says "Cow!"