Poo, spew and some movies too!

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December 18th 2010
Published: December 25th 2010
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Eight months ago when I booked the tickets it seemed like a good idea to take two kids under 3 on a big European trip for 6 weeks. But sitting on the plane with a 21 hour journey ahead of us, it seemed I wasn't thinking so clearly. In theory, it was going to work perfectly. It was an overnight flight so the kids should fall asleep just after take off. But we were about to find out if theory and practice were two different things. We had some dinner and started the process of calming the girls down. Thank God for Gina Ford's bedtime routine, because both girls went down soundly, as if they were in their own beds! Mykenzie woke during the night but a little bit of TV put her right back to sleep. Edyn also slept really well but what 11 month old can't sleep anywhere! She was sprawled across my lap so it wasn't too much different for her. I now have realised, that I can go to the toilet with one hand and that if you don't stretch your legs during a 14 hour direct flight, they are likely to fall off!

The flight had gone really well and we were preparing for landing and psyching up for the next flight. Edyn was sitting on my lap and I got a whiff of something that smelt suspiciously like poo! No problem, I would just let her finish and then change her. It didn't seem to be ending and the smell just kept getting stronger which was a little weird! I put my hand down to see what was going on and put it straight into the problem. The poo had found it's way out of the nappy and onto (thankfully) the blanket that was in between Edyn and my lap! The poo was slightly runny and I bundled baby and blanket up and ran off to the toilet. Unfortunately every man and their dog was waiting for the toilet and the poo was not going to stop on account of there being no toilets available! I ran back to our seat and changed the nappy right there and then. There next person in that seat will be happy to know that no more poo escaped! And, no I can't remember what the seat number was!

Whilst I was cleaning myself up, Edyn was sitting on Jason's lap and Mykenzie was in the middle of us. Now, I have heard about the urban legend that is projectile vomiting but I have never seen it with my own eyes until the decent on flight EK43! I thought after the poo incident, there would be nothing left in Edyn's little body. But her angelic face went white and the contents of her little tummy sprayed a radius of around 1 metre! This included all of Jason's clothes and most of Mykenzie's. I was lucky to be just outside of that radius so missed out on the projectile vomit but still had the stink of poo on my hands so I wasn't spared altogether! The thing with projectile vomiting is that you're never actually sure when or even IF it will ever end! After about 4 sprays, it stopped and everything around us was wet! We cleaned her up and thankfully were only a few minutes from landing.

Our first stop at Dubai airport were the showers which was wonderful, but other than that, Dubai really is just an airport with lots of different nationalities and duty free shops!

The flight to Paris didn't start so well with a delay of around an hour sitting on the tarmac waiting for the go ahead to take off. Apparently there was just a small window of landing in Paris due to the snow and weather so we were waiting for that. Unbeknownst to us, the weather was causing havoc all over Europe but we were blissfully flying above it all. Edyn slept the whole of the flight, due to her being a little sick and Mykenzie just watched TV like a good little girl. I got to watch 4 movies which I don't think I've ever done but really I had no choice with a sleeping baby on my lap.

7 hours later we landed in Paris to kaos everywhere. Being a family, we were ushered through so didn't have to wait in line with 4 other planes to to get through customs. On the outside we realised just how crazy things were after sighting some bags sitting in Paris instead of London!


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