Land of Fire and Water

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February 24th 2009

Published: March 12th 2009

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Kerry100

Land of Fire

Ayers Rock at sunset.

The heading is particularly appropriate, considering the recent disasters befalling the northern and southern parts of Australia. It seems bizarre that some Australians were up to their necks in floodwater, while at the same time others were frantically attempting to escape the bushfires. Fortunately we left Victoria a few days before the fires broke out. As we left, the temperature had creeped up to 44 degrees and the wind was rising fairly dramatically. It´s easy to see how quickly a fire could spread in those conditions.

Unfortunately for us, we flew from Victoria to Cairns in Northern Queensland, only to arrive in the middle of a cyclone scare. That's another story though - this entry is on my trips with Wilma to the "Red Centre" and to the Great Ocean Road. The heading really relates to the landscapes we encountered and not to the depressing death and destruction but I felt I should mention it, given its extent.

The Land of Fire - Red Centre

I´m sure Wilma won´t mind me saying this (if she does then it´s too late anyway) but when we were at university together she had a number of aversions. These were (in no

King´s Canyon

Wilma leaping from rock to rock.

particular order, other than pigeons being at the top):

1. pigeons;
2. birds generally;
3. moths;
4. butterflies;
5. in fact, anything with wings except maybe flies & bluebottles. And maybe ladybirds;
6. spiders;
7. insects generally;
8. bridges;
9. heights;
10. curly hair.

Other things about Wilma: she had never been camping and tends not to be particularly enthusiastic about hiking (although I do find it difficult to be friends with people who are enthusiastic about hiking).

Anyway, I booked us the cheapest Ayers Rock tour I could find. This involved sleeping outdoors in a ¨swag bag¨(surprisingly comfortable and waterproof), hiking up the aptly named ¨Heart Attack Hill¨, crossing bridges, encountering a number of creatures, flying and otherwise and not having plug points for straighteners. Amazingly though, we both managed to enjoy it without the use of hard drugs.

The first day we met the rest of the tour group, most of whom were students, mainly from the Netherlands and Germany. There was a horrific ¨getting to know you¨session involving a microphone on the bus where I managed (inadvertently of course) to reinforce the Scottish alcoholic stereotype by telling the entire bus that Wilma &

Dinner

Sitting on swag bags and drinking beer / cheap white wine in plastic cups.

I had bottles of wine stashed in our bags.

You see, prior to leaving Melbourne, a helpful soul advised me that the one problem his tour group had was that no alcohol can be bought in the Red Centre itself. Apparently everyone was disappointed as they all fancied a glass of wine while watching the sunset over Ayers Rock. WIlma & I decided to be clever so bought two bottles of wine & a pack of plastic cups, in order that everyone could have a drink & we would be like the most popular cool kids ever.

As it turned out, there is one place to buy alcohol prior to getting to the main national park and everyone else bought nice cold beers while we sipped on our slightly warm white wine out of plastic cups. You live and learn.

Day one revolved around climbing the previously mentioned ¨Heart Attack Hill¨to reach the top of King´s Canyon and begin the ¨Rim Walk¨. We had to carry three litres of water as we were climbing in the midday sun. Good organisation by the tour leader there. As I panted and puffed my way up, I was overtaken at

Garden of Eden

Not the real Garden of Eden, obviously.

speed by Wilma who practically leapt from rock to rock. Turns out she had been in some sort of training regime at the gym. She must have had a premonition.

The walk itself was nice enough, but it was really too hot to enjoy. The best part was swimming in the Garden of Eden, a natural waterhole. The algae made everyone´s skin look a murky yellow colour under the water. The tour guide bizarrely waded in fully clothed and swam around.

The tour guide, Bree, was actually very interesting. She explained that in Aboriginal culture, a person makes the transition from childhood to adulthood based on knowledge level and not on age. So in Aboriginal culture, we are all children. We are only allowed to know the children´s stories and take photographs of areas appropriate for children.

The second day we walked round the Olgas or Kata Tjuta (the Aboriginal name). Apparently this site is almost more sacred to the Aboriginal culture than Ayers Rock itself. The reason most people don´t know much about it is because the Aboriginies have asked for a degree of privacy. Legend has it that it was the site of a massacre.

Kata Tjuta

It´s a shame it´s so cloudy because it is very impressive.

Of course, though, everybody wants to see Ayers Rock. On the second evening, we went to see it at sunset. The change in colour is amazing, although it was a bit cloudy so wasn´t as impressive as some of the photos I´ve seen. We sat with our beers / plastic cups with warm white wine and seemed to be a source of amusement for a group of Japanese tourists sipping champagne and eating canapes.

On the third day we went to the Rock itself. It is a pretty impressive sight. The section that amazed me was a huge hole in the shape of a bell on one side of the Rock. The area was marked as ¨Women´s Business¨, so we couldn´t take photos. The tour guide explained that in the 1950s, wedding photographers were bringing clients to this bell-shaped hole and taking photos of the happy couple inside. The Aboriginies were furious and eventually explained that every single birth within a particular tribe had taken place in the hole. How a 9 month pregnant woman manages to climb into it I have no idea (it´s a good 10 feet off the ground).

An ongoing controversy rages over

Hole in Ayers Rock

Imagine this in the shape of a wedding bell & you can visualise where the women give birth. If you really want to.

whether or not tourists should climb Ayers Rock. A little handrail exists and anyone is allowed to climb. However, there are signs up everywhere from the Aboriginal community asking that their culture be respected and that tourists do not climb.

There´s an interesting legal point (no, it´s not an oxymoron) surrounding this issue. The Australian Government essentially took the land from the Aboriginies a number of years ago. They then leased it back to the Aboriginies for 99 years. The Aboriginies have been given the right to block tourists from entering onto and photographing land sacred to men and women. As I said before, we were limited to the children´s land.

The only climbable section is where Aboriginal boys climb up after being on ¨walkabout¨. Once they reach the top, they become men and climb down. The section at the very top where they become men is called Uluru.

So technically tourists should only be able to climb up but not back down. Once the 99 year lease is up, it is extremely likely no tourists will be allowed to climb. Incidentally, all this is according to our tour guide - it could be completely made up

Camel Riding

No, it´s not a joke. We actually did.

for all I know.

Anyway, none of us climbed. The climb itself was shut due to the weather but I doubt anyone would have done it anyway.

So that was the end of our tour. We had a night out in Alice Springs on the third night which involved saloon bars and all of us ending up at the tour guide´s flat where she was carried off to bed because she couldn´t walk. It made me wonder how she manages to do that job if she ends up like that after every tour.

Alice Springs is an interesting place. Aboriginies have basically been forced off the land and put into local housing, where they don´t seem to want to be. I daresay I´m over-simplifying and I don´t know much about it, but there certainly seems to be a huge social problem in Alice Springs. Groups of Aboriginies hang round the streets drinking and fighting. There is an uncomfortable, intimidating atmosphere and I certainly wouldn´t walk around myself after dark. It´s really very sad and I suppose not easily fixed.

So that was my experience of the Northern Territory. In keeping with my luck, we were in

Land of Water

The Twelve Apostles on the Great Ocean Road.

Alice Springs for what was apparently the heaviest rainfall in 30 years or something similar. The river flowed for the first time in years, so the local kids were delighted. I´m starting to think I should hang around areas in Africa affected by drought and see what happens.

The Land of Water - Great Ocean Road

The Great Ocean Road is very accessible from Melbourne, but it´s still worth taking a tour in order to see all the main sights. Ross, Wilma and I embarked on a day tour which took from 7 in the morning until almost 8 at night which felt like a long day.

We started by visiting a lighthouse that was apparently used in a kids´ TV programme called Round the Twist, which I´ve never heard of. Ross and Wilma on the other hand were acting as though they had stumbled upon Narnia.

In keeping with the TV programme (apparently), the tour guide got us to jump up and down in front of the lighthouse while he clambered down a hill and took photos of us with our cameras. It was all a bit odd but quite funny. There were differing levels

Round the Twist

Literally.

of enthusiasm which you can see from the photos.

We passed through lots of quaint little towns (one of which is called Lorne like the sausage). Unexpectedly, we went for a walk in a rainforest. I didn´t know there were rainforests so far south.

The highlight of the day, though, has to be the Twelve Apostles. There are arguments over exactly how many are left but regardless of this - the view is spectacular. (Incidentally, I counted eight.)

We also saw London Bridge or at least the place where it used to be as London Bridge did in fact fall down. Apparently a guy and his girlfriend were trapped on the other side of the rock formation when the bridge fell and had to be rescued by helicopter. Obviously this attracted the local media. The problem was that he´d told his wife he was at work and told his work he was ill at home.

Anyway. It was a nice day. The tour guide was a tad eccentric as they all seem to be. Maybe the lighthouse story gave that away already. He was obsessed that other tour guides were following him and copying his ideas.

London Bridge

Or a bit of it. It used to link the rocks, apparently.

He had a particularly negative relationship with one other guide whom he dubbed ¨Santa¨. (To be fair ¨Santa¨was relatively large and had white hair and a white beard.)

Food of the tours: it´s actually going to be a drink - is that allowed? Since it´s my rules then I say yes. It has to be ¨goon¨, cheap Australian wine that we drank on our night out in Alice Springs. It tasted like vinegar.

Quote of the tours: Bree, the Ayers Rock tour guide as soon as we got onto the bus - ¨welcome to the hardcore camping and hiking tour¨. I think if Wilma had had a gun I might be dead.

Bye.

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