Day 4 - Ballina, Byron Bay, Gympie, Poverty Point

---

Day 4.

I am back in familiar and familial territory this morning as I awake in sunny Ballina at my brothers’ home, having spent the night there. I managed to offload my partner in crime at Wardell which is 15km south of the home of the Big Prawn. He spent the night with a family member there. We reconvened at a café in the main street this morning. It was clear from the outset that I would be driving as it appears that last night Chris had met all the locals at the Wardell Recreational Club over a beer or two. He seemed to have been very taken with a big hairy sugarcane farmer called Jim. At this stage I am beginning to think my night wasn’t that bad after all, sitting around a radio listening to the football. Don’t ask.



So, having had our morning injection of caffeine we headed North, destination Rainbow Beach. Not before I had taken Chris on Adam’s tour of Ballina and environs, though. I identified numerous points of interest from my years of visiting my family up here. The old house, the current house, the court house, the manor house, the lighthouse, the beaches, the golf course, East Ballina shops, the swimming pool, the library and of course Bunnings. I must say that I was a bit disappointed in Chris’ lack of enthusiasm. I could swear that he nodded off between the Golf Course and the East Ballina shops. He also wasn’t impressed that I took him a scenic route through Lennox Head and Byron Bay. However we did see a rainbow painted road bridge on the Hinterland Way out of Byron. Now there’s something you don’t see every day.



It wasn’t long after that we were hurtling up the expressway, heading for Queensland. It is a strange State, Queensland. Not long after crossing the border we came across a billboard with a picture of a man wearing glasses and a big smile. Written next to him in large capital letters was “DR SNIP” and under that “walk in, walk out” and under that “Vasectomy” and a phone number. There was no need to say anything. Not long after that we were assaulted by signs for “Worlds”. Movie World, Dream World, Water World, Aussie World, Steve Irwin World. We were desperately seeking another giant object that we could have our photo taken with. We surmised that there could be a giant Akubra Hat at Aussie World but not so. Our last hope prior to leaving the mayhem of the motorway was the Ginger Factory, could there possibly be a giant piece of ginger? Alas, no. We did find some solace, though whilst reminiscing about the time we stumbled across the big Murray Cod on our last camping trip.



By this time, Chris had taken over the driving and he advised me that we weren’t going all the way to Rainbow Beach but we are camping at Poverty Bay. This place lives up to its name as they couldn’t even afford a sign for the turn off which we realised as we sailed past. Poverty Bay is in the Cooloola National Park and is accessed by four wheel drive vehicles only. Once on the track we could see why. Deep sandy furrows dictated the terrain of the road and after about 5 minutes in we made the executive decision to engage the 4WD as it was becoming quite difficult. Just as we did this, at the next corner, the track flattened out and you could have driven a moped on it. Typical.



We found the campsite and it is stunning. The sun is setting over the water as we erect our tent for the first time with a minimum of fuss. We erect the other things we need, seamlessly. Bushman Adam starts a fire, its perfect. Life is good.This is what it is all about. “Hey Chris, can you pass me the Aeroguard? There’s a few mozzies about…………..Chris the Aeroguard?” After a few well chosen expletives, Chris advises me that he has left it at home. This was the cue for Mossie apolcalypse. As soon as the sun went down, the unmistakable whine became a low drone as masses of hungry Mosquitos left their watery dwelling in search of blood. We had to do something. This place is very secluded but we did notice a campsite down the track a bit. I suggested that one of us should go and ask those fellow, possibly hillbilly queenslander campers if we can borrow some insect repellent. I drew the short straw. As I walked up the darkening track I could see the silhouette of two men around a fire, drinking beer. It was at this point I began to wish that I had never seen Deliverance. “G’day fellas” I say in my finest Queenslander accent. “Sorry to bother ya but my idiot mate left the Aeroguard at home, ya wouldn’t have any I can bum off ya. Would ya.” They looked at me like I was some queenslander hillbilly and produced a life -saving can for us to borrow.



Chris cooked dinner. Pork steaks with salad and now we are about to retire for the night. It was at point I began to wish that I had never seen Brokeback Mountain. Goodnight.

---